What do I do about my pregnant 15yo niece?

Question

My niece is 15 and just over 6 weeks pregnant to an 18yo that she was sneaking out late at nite to meet in an alleyway. She is very immature for her age and more like a 12yo. Should the father of the baby be reported for carnal knowledge? What are the legal ramifications, if there are any. She lives with her grandmother who is in her late 60's and not in the position of looking after her and the baby because of her schedule that she has with her commitments. None of her aunts and uncles believe that she should go ahead with the pregnancy at all as we all know her well and know that she won't cope. Any suggestions or comments are appreciated.

Answer 1

If the 18 year old is reported to the police, chances are he will be come a registered sex offender. If he is aware of her age then I would report him to the police.
As for your niece, she needs to get into therapy. It doesn't sound like she has much guidance in her life and perhaps has had a hard life growing up. If she has the mentality of a 12 year old, she needs extra support to teach her things she is not learning at home.
The baby should be placed for adoption. Find a loving two parent home with people who can afford to raise a child. Let the child have an opportunity to be loved, happy and be raised by people who want him. Being raised by a 15 year old with no support system, no money and a fly by the night father is cruel to the baby.
Your niece needs to live with someone who will be there for her. If grandma is too busy with her commitments, she needs to have her granddaughter live with someone who will look after her.
No matter what, the girl needs to be on some sort of birth control. Not the pill that she has to take everyday but something that she goes to the doctor every few months. She needs to be taught about STD's. She needs to be taught about respecting herself and not finding love by opening her legs.
She needs to be in a home with people who will do all these things for her. If it doesn't happen, a year from now the same thing will happen. It will be an endless cycle.

Answer 2

Statuatory rape charge ages vary by state. Some states the legal age is 17, 16 or yes even 15 if the other person is within 3 years of their age. In a situation like this it leaves little recourse I know. Because he is of legal age I don't know if he can try to claim any right to this baby should he so choose. I would check with a lawyer Before he tries causing problems. If there isn't anyone in the family who can help her with this baby and becasue she seems to be being raised with less supervision and guidance than she obviously needs I would suggest putting this baby up for adoption, I do not know what you will do about her though and there is a good chance she could end up in the same situation again if things are not drastically changed for her. If she is going to keep the baby she will need so much help, guidance and supervision. I hope someone will help her until ahe has a chance to mature and be able to care for this baby on her own. She will be able to receive child support since the father is over 18 so that should help a little. This is a tough situation and I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 3

I guess the question goes to what is best for her and the baby. If the 18 yo is willing to stay around and be a father, some guys actually are willing to make that commitment, than I think that reporting this would be a bad idea for the simple fact that you would be depriving a child of a father. Most importantly it is up to your 15 yo niece. If she wants to have the baby then there is nothing that can be done about that. However, this is a situation in which abortion or adoption may be the best courses of action. I believe that the important thing to do is to bring her to a doctor or counselor so that she can be presented with all of the relevant information. Getting upset with her and yelling at her are not the answer, knowledge is always the best suggestion.

Answer 4

I definitely do believe the guy should be reported to the authorities. But even then, much of it is not his fault. Your niece had the audacity to meet him in an alley many nights, so this is her problem, not his. If she is immature, then the best thing for her to do with the child is either have an abortion or give the child up to adoption. Immature people never look after anyone. Since her grandmother has her own life, I think she should not take care of your niece and her unborn child. She is a much older person now, I know she wouldn't want an added responsibility. If your niece decides to keep the baby, then your family have discussions to go through with her. Perhaps you can keep the child, she can give up her parental rights. I don't know, this is just one of the many options. Or she can be sent to a group home, she snuck out at night, so I am sure she can take care of the kid. But all I know, based on the information given is she is not to be taking care of a child.

Answer 5

Lets see,my solution is that you should try to comfort her and settle things down with everyone..You sound the most concern and i have seen and heard about girls of young age getting pregnant...And it is a scary moment but there are those who are willing to take responsibility keeping the child even though it may seem immature coming out of her mouth...The thing is, she is the one who is pregnant and i bet that she had already thought of what may the outcome be if she did, unprotectedly...Many of the young supposed to be fathers left without a care that they got the girl pregnant..But I think you should have a word with the guy and understand his situation..Than talk to your niece but try to listen more than judging because she may seem incapable but you can tell how seriously honest she is in keeping the baby... At least have a family discussion with all and talk sense to everyone and put your niece words first before others because it is after her life and in conclusion as aunts or uncles,as a family, all should try supporting her in any way you could.Your niece is going through a scary moment and it may seem stupidity to adults but if she is willing to have the child than killing it than in a way she is becoming a better person..So give a hand and lend a shoulder as one family.

Answer 6

Legal ramifications vary state to state and if you lock the boy up (which as a parent I would try to do out of spite. . . not a good reason) he cannot fulfill his financial obligations to this girl. The best route, of course, is adoption. Adoptive parents will generally take care of all the medical expenses of the girl and the baby and the baby will be raised in a loving family with the appropriate financial resources to take care of it. The girl (and guy) need major counseling NOW.

You are only going to be able to offer suggestions. There is probably nothing you can legally do. I would start with the suggestion of adoption and go from there.

Answer 7

if he is ready and willing to be a father, then don't say anything about it, although officials probably will when the baby is born. If he denies having anything to do with it and shows no respect to her pregnancy, then you need to get in contact with the police because it is illegal for someone 18 and older to have sex with a minor without prior consent, and he could be charged with statutory rape or sex with a minor. as for your niece, please try not to show how disappointed you are in her, because after all she is pregnant, and she might stress out over it which may not be good for the baby. Ask her if she wants to continue the pregnancy and explain to her what to expect. and since she is only 15, you need to stress the fact that she will need to stick around and take care of the baby because she can't expect grandma to do it.. she already took care of her kids years ago and is doing your niece a favor by letting her live with her. well if your family has no idea what to do or how to handle this, then you guys should consider going to family counseling or going to a pregnancy class (all of you) and discuss your options. if yall do go, then MAKE sure you take the "daddy" with you. I hope everything turns out fine though

Answer 8

I think that if she is 15 and he is 18 then some thing should be done. That is like rap. She is to young for him. I was young and dumb when i was 15 and i was massing around with a 17 year old and well lets just say some things happen. Let her know that you are the boss and what you say goes. Tell her that becuz of their age he can go to prieson for a long time. tell her that when the baby is born then he can see the baby every other weeked.

Answer 9

I was an immature 16 yo when I had my first child, his father was 18 yo and we thought that we were in love. We got married at these same ages and we struggled. Our son is now 17 yo and is in his senior year of high school, he makes A's and B's. Somehow we did the best we could to make ends meet just for our son's sake. What I'm trying to say is that once this child came into this world we had no choice but to grow up. this child was the best thing to happen to me. He settled me down and gave me a reason to be mature. and who knows if i hadn't got pregnant when i did i could have ended up hooked on drugs and dying in an alley or ditch some where. Where is this girl's mother and father?

Answer 10

i wouldn't report the father he is only 3 years older than her. if he was like 20 or older i would report him. reporting him would just cause more problems. i mean if she decides to keep the baby i don't think he would be able to pay child support from jail. another thing if she does keep the baby, in the future it would cause a lot hate and resentment in the future.

as for your neice maybe u can get her one of those dolls that act like a real child so she can see for herself what being a parent is really like. show her the cost of children. than let her make the decision on her own. yelling at her and putting her down will not help her. telling her what she should do will not help either.