Why do you think that sex without marriage is NOT wrong?

Question

Do you just follow the opinion of the masses and the pressures of society without any questions or do you have an opinion of your own?

Answer 1

Yes, you SHOULD wait until marriage. However, how granted is marriage to begin with. Say you find that ONE special person in your life. There is no telling how far it is going to go. It might end up in marriage. Who knows? However you share that special moment with that person. Is it REALLY wrong?

People get married every day for the WRONG reason.

Answer 2

The thing is I have realised that i dont want to give my virginity to the first person that asks, and then a few years down the line think back and say " i cant believe my first time way with them!!!"
That is why i feel that i must make sure that my first time is with the right person. Marriage is an almost garrentee that the person is right - but like most things in this world is not 100%. People cheet, divorce etc. Any way that is why i am waiting till i am married.
The thing is if someone finds the right person, but they are scared of marrige, or think it is too much effort etc etc etc, i dont think that they should have to be marrieg to have sex. Take Gene Simmons from Kiss. He doesnt have a wife - he has a like partner, and they have 2 kids together. I think that that is perfectly ok. It i more if people sleep around that it is bad, and some people want to able to make a list of the people they have slept with, without having to worry about any commitment.

Answer 3

Sex and marriage are, for most of human history, distinct activities: sex, whether procreative or just creative, is an act that occurs between two (or more) people - and ethically, I'm with Dan Savage on this one: no problem with any combination or act as long as both, or all, parties CONSENT (no dead people, no kids, no animals). Marriage is a contract between two subjects and the state, guaranteeing inheritance and taxation rights (in states that follow versions of Roman law). In other cultures, marriage may signify other things: agreeing to raise and counsel your nephews; leading a war party...

In the EuroWestern world, the pressures of society have tended towards containing sex within marriage at least since feudal times, in order to ensure that land and money were passed to a biological male heir. Pressures particularly applied to women, who were expected to preserve their virginity for sale to the highest bidder. In the late feudal stages, the troubadours' mythology of love and romance developed, and was used by dominant culture to weave together love, sex and marriage (even though the troubadours' lays were often sung by men desiring married women).

As for "the opinion of the masses," I'm intrigued to know what this is, how you discovered it, and why you think that you are able to stand outside it. Globally, I think you'd find that more people in all cultures and ages groups now believe in a religiously-mandated marriage between a male (of whatever sexual experience) and a virginal woman. There are many forms of resistance to this - some thinking, some maybe unthinking - but they are not the global norm.

I agree that some aspects of the media overtly endorse sexual experimentation, and have been accused of pressuring teenagers into sexual intercourse while they are still emotionally immature. You could flip this around and say that religions and schools pressure students into signing away their rights to their sexuality while they are emotionally immature.

It's been proven that teens who receive abstinence-only education in the US wait on average one week longer to have their first sexual experience than teens who have had full contraceptive sex education . Yup, that's right: True Love Waits... a week. In addition, those teens are much less likely to use a condom or any contraceptive methods, and much more likely to get pregnant or catch/transmit STIs. There is also evidence that abstinence-only teens are less able to resist sexual coercion, and less able to give informed consent.

Education - which means learning _all_ the facts and being empowered to make your own decisions - is key to all sexuality, and is exactly what is resisted by abstinence-only educators (favoured by GWB to the extent that global sexual health NGOs only receive funding from the states if they preach ABC -- Abstinence, Be Faithful, Condoms in Emergency). Only education can allow people to form opinions of their own.

If you live in a school district where you feel you are not receiving adequate sexual health and sexuality education, below are some sites you can check out...

Answer 4

Because there is no reason that 2 adults cannot communicate in any way they want and cannot use their bodies as they please, since they are not hurting anyone. Of course, we are talking about mature people, who can practise safe sex and be responsible for their actions, which is pretty much the reason why religions and societies advertise sex within marriage (because outside marriage there can be many unwanted pregnancies).

A healthy sex life is necessary for all adults, that doesn't mean we should get married, unless we find the right person and be in a mature enough relationship for marriage.

Plus, if I had married the first guy I had sex with, I would be divorced now and I wouldn't be married to the man of my life, whom I met later.

Answer 5

The key thing here is the way that- in your question- you making having sex at some point a question of right or wrong. It is for sure that, through history, it has been made out to be a moral issue and has been the source of much misery as various people have been made out to be villains or simply 'wicked' for having sex with the wrong person, or at the wrong time, or with the wrong gender! In the last century in Britain they even locked up some women as 'moral defectives' because they had been found to engage in extra-marital sex.

It seems to me that sex can be a profoundly enjoyable activity, whether on its own or in the context of something bigger- like a lifelong relationship. I'm sure that- in common with most other human activities- there will be occasions when it is not the right thing to do, and times when it is exactly the right thing to do!

But the last thing that is needed is to wheel in God or the legions of the 'decent' to legislate for the rest of us. Can't each adult individual be permitted to form their own opinion of what they want to do, with whom, and when they like?

Answer 6

First of all, let us define Sex.

Sex refers to the: male and female duality of biology and reproduction, a process in biological DNA that dates back 4.6 - 3.5 billion years. DNA links back in an unbroken series of sexual reproduction taking forward information to present day. The somewhat similar term gender has more to do with identity than biology. The concept is confined to organisms that reproduce sexually.

Now, as you can see, Sex is the means through which organisms produce an offspring and ensure the existence of their species for the generations to come. But Sex is only done for reproductive purposes in Animals, except Humans, Which tend to associate sex directly with pleasure.

Personally, I think Sex before marriage is okay, but it is only okay so long as the person who is willing to engage in Sex and Sexual intercourse is familiar with the consequences of having Sex. For example, myriads of Sexually Transmitted Diseases do exist which have diverse effects ranging from making you sterile as in Syphilis to rendering you without immune system (Immuno-deficiency) as in Aids.

Also, even if these diseases didn't exist, Sex has far reaching social effects. When you are having Sex it is possible that you might bring a child into this world. Having an unwanted pregnancy and eventually a child is not very desirable. If you can't afford to have the child you resort to mostly unorthodox ways of avoiding having the child. Abortion, which can endanger both the life and health of the mother and child , Having a child and throwing your child ( Trust me, I've seen mothers throw their children in the streets ) and making a child not have his Basic and essential rights ( the love from a father and a mother ) are some of the diverse effects of , what should I call it, 'Sex-go-awry'.

There is also the moral and religious side to consider. Most religions that have a well established setup on our societies do not approve of Sex outside the wedlock in general. Some have expressed their explicit and puritanical views on forms of Sex like Sodomy and Unorthodox sex. In short, you have that side to entertain as well if you are religious too.

My advice is that you can have sex, but be aware of the consequences a one night stand may have on you. Use condoms all the time ( even with the most trusted person) and be aware of the ways STD's are transmitted.

Now, does anyone want to buy some condoms from me?...lol.

Answer 7

Because I believe marriage is a waste of time and money, and that nobody should get married. Chances are that they're going to divorce eventually anyway... which costs even more money.... and people who really do love each other for the long term should be fully capable of staying together for the long term -without- being legally chained together.

As such... that sex without marriage isn't wrong is a given.

[Addendum: Rhapsody's answer makes me happy in my underwear.]

Answer 8

I think that the bible says its wrong. I think the bible was written too many centuries ago.

Since you obviously believe in following the "word of god", I wonder if you follow all these archaic "rules". The ones like if you can't have children with your husband, you are to divorce him and marry one of his brothers. Or if it's your problem, then he divorces you to go and find a wife who can provide children.

Or maybe you follow the rules about a wife keeping her mouth shut and being the keeper of the home only. Always defer to your husband and allow him to voice the family's (his) opinions, do you follow that too?

Or my personal favorite, sex is ONLY for procreation, so if you are post-menopausal, no sex even if married, or heaven forbid you have an illness/injury and have to be sterilized, no sex ever again, oh yeah, don't forget the hubby then gets a pass to take another wife.

Why do you look down on and put down people who have a different moral compass than you?

Mighty Christian attitude there.

Answer 9

I was married when i was 21 years and the man who married me was my first guy to have sex with. I got pregnant that first day and we got married immediately. I didn't enjoy sex the first time and i have never enjoyed sex. We separated after four years of marriage and to tell you the truth i hate sex, men and every thing to do with marriage. Since we separated six years ago i have never had sex and i don't miss it one bit. I'm happy without it and my point was with or without marriage sex depend on personality or what you believe or how you feel about your partner one mistake can ruin your whole sex life and i mean whole life issue

Answer 10

I whole heartededly refuse to conform to any boundaries set forth simply by public opinion.Fact is it's usually only religious zealots that adhere to these guidelines.I always obey the laws set forth by legislators and law makers(except speed limits some of the time).Public opinion really means nothing to me.
I lost my virginity at the age of 14 and have had premarital sex HUNDREDS of times.
My ex wife and I even did it before we got married.Being accepted by the non thinking conformist society means absolutely nothing to me.I do however value the opinions of thinking people who I grow to respect.Fact is none of those people that I know agree with the stance that one should wait for marriage.
Outside that it's yet one more way to test compatibility between the two.