when do you know that you have a problem with drink.i dont drink every day but when i start i dont want to stop.my wife thinks i have a problem but i have always denied it.i think its affecting our relationship,but how do you get away from drinking when all your friends drink and socialise.
2006-11-12 21:47:54 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
In MY opinion...you are NOT an alcoholic, if you do not drink "EVERYDAY".
An alcoholic (again...in MY opinion)...is one who...
1) Drinks EVERYDAY...
2) HIDES it from ppl...
3) SNEAKS it in, say, a Flask, Coffee Cup, Anything In Dusguise, Ect...
4) Has an Alcoholic Beverage from the time they WAKE UP, ALL DAY & is the LAST THING they DRINK @ the END OF THE DAY...
5) LIES about their drinking...
6) Etc......
I do not kno how "Often" you drink, but you write that your the "Energizer Bunny Type Drinker". (You keep going & going & going & going) LOL
If you really wanna "Get Away From Drinking When All Your Friends Drink & Socialize", my best suggestions are 2 things...
1) Dont go out with your "Drinking" friends.
Tip: When your "Drinking" friends wanna go out, dont go... instead, spend quality time W/ your wife...take her out 2 a movie, dinner, dancing, shopping, stay home & rent sum movies, etc. That will help your injured marriage & show her that you are NOT an alcoholic @ the same time. ;)
2) Try to be "Strong Willed" & just say NO!
Tip:Do you "Drink & Drive"? If not...(and I HOPE not) then you can go out with your drinking friends, but make yourself the "DESIGNATED DRIVER". THAT alone, IF you do NOT Drink & Drive, should make you NOT drink. ;) (I would only do THIS on "Occassion", I would spend more time W/ your wife) This way, you can spend time W/ both, your wife & your friends.
But, I would let your friends KNOW what you are thinking, going thru & trying to do...if they ARE your TRUE FRIENDS, trust me, they WILL understand. :)
I WISH YOU THE VERY BEST! GOOD LUCK TO YOU!
2006-11-12 22:14:49 · answer #1 · answered by GITTIN_FREAKIE 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
The Hard nosed anti-alcohol brigade will tell you that you are an alcoholic if your drinking, no matter how much or how often affects your life in a negative way. Seems a tad too strict a definition to me, but if you drink in excess and find that your work or social interactions with people are affected then it's time to take stock and ask yourself if you want to modify your behaviour or not. In the end only a wish to stop drinking by YOU will do any good. You can't stop for someone else.
2006-11-13 00:17:44 · answer #2 · answered by Pattythepunk 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's a saying that if you think you have a drinking problem then you probably do. You don't have to drink every day to be an alcoholic. There are daily drinkers (which I was) and there are binge drinkers, which you may be. You owe it to yourself (not to your wife) to attend at least one meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous. They are 'Guaranteed or your Misery Back'. My personal experience was that after I got sober my friends were not friends at all but just drinking buddies. Besides, your marriage needs to come before them. If you don't like the AA meeting then you can always get up and walk out but it requires nothing on your part except to go. You'll be surprised that the people there are pretty much 'normal' people. Good luck!
2006-11-12 21:57:30 · answer #3 · answered by tumbleweed1954 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The weekly alcohol consumption for men is 21 units per week. The link below will help you calculate how many units you are having, and will give you advice on what to do if you are at an unhealthy amount.
http://www.bupa.co.uk/health_information/asp/healthy_living/lifestyle/alcohol/alctest.asp
Remeber you dont have to drink because others are. Conversations often last longer and are more inspired when drinking less. Maybe you could play pool/bowling whilst out. This way you also require to concentrate on a game whilst drinking, therefore you may feel less inclined to have so many drinks whilst out.
If you find you are drinking to much, there are plenty of support groups out there that can help.
2006-11-12 22:22:57 · answer #4 · answered by Need_to_know 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If alcohol is having a detrimental effect on your relationship, I reckon it`s time to start thinking about how much you are consuming.
You could try controlling the amount you drink? might be helpful? coz it doesn`t sound to me that you are an alcoholic. If you were an Alcoholic you would be looking for a drink the minute you got up in the morning, to keep you going throughout the day, hiding booze, not eating, staying off work etc etc...hope this helps :-)
2006-11-12 21:58:09 · answer #5 · answered by sols 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Alcoholism can be diagnosed by a trained/licensed mental health professional, yet it is ultimately up to the individual to determine if they have a problem or not.
Be honest with yourself, denial and justification will get you nowhere in a rush.
What is more important, your wife, or a drink with a few buddies?
2006-11-12 21:51:47 · answer #6 · answered by DrunkenDialer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You explain to your friends you're cutting down & ask them to respect your efforts in this. You stop going to the bars and clubs or only go once a week or so and drink something less strong.
If your friends are true friends (not booze buddies) they will care enough about you to not drink to excess in your presence. If they make it difficult for you then they really aren't your friends.
If you don't drastically cut down you will eventually not only lose your liver, kidney & health but also your wife, marriage, job and community's respect.
It isn't worth it !!!
2006-11-12 21:52:59 · answer #7 · answered by madamspud 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is common.
you must feel a bit like there is a problem.
go to a couple of AA meetings, she will feel you are doing something about it and you will find the answer within if you do have a problem. but only go with a positive mind.
if she feels three is a problem and you don't do nothing it can only go down hill.
good luck
god bless you both
2006-11-13 22:33:58 · answer #8 · answered by PETER J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find where there is an AA meeting near you and atend. There is no shame in admitting there may be aproblem. If it is affecting your relationship then it is a problem. The every day part does not matter.
2006-11-12 23:28:26 · answer #9 · answered by eagledreams 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you can't stop while you are drinking then you do have a problem. As for your friends, you will need to decide what is more important your friends or your family. But the first step you need to take is to admit that you have a problem. Good luck
2006-11-12 22:08:48 · answer #10 · answered by kelsey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋