Why do women respond to "mind games"?

Question

It's odd that so many women say they look for a man who "doesn't play games", but when you do play games you're much more likely to get a positive response from a woman (if your objective is to get a woman to take you seriously). Why is that?

For the record... I haven't lied, or done anything hurtful. I am talking about the more basic things... like playing hard to get, being non-commital, and answering "yes" to the "am I fat" question.

Answer 1

Guys play mind-games too?


I was only aware of women doing it....

You know.... the whole "yes = no", "no = no", "... = yes" thing... among others (I'm not even going to get into the infinite possibilities of the word "maybe").
But then I suppose I don't really pay much attention to what other guys say as much.

It makes more sense to say that its a neurotypical thing..... Mind games in the classic sense, that is.... I mean when I think about it, thats a pretty solid term for all the weird and illogical social interactions that go on between "normal" people.... Makes no smeggin sense to me.
Now .... I can occasionally manipulate people in my own special way by deliberately selecting words and phrases that neurotypicals would mistakenly assume to mean something else... but in my usual style tend to mean EXACTLY what I say.... or occasionally saying nothing to leave them with the inference that they don't want to know the answer when in fact its something completely innocent (and once they learn that, they learn not to jump to hasty conclusions). Aside from that, I tend to be completely honest.... brutally so in fact.
... And I can't figure out why other people aren't the same way. Its so much easier...


All in all, to answer your question:
Women respond to mind games because its a perfectly normal / neurotypical thing to do.... despite being crazy and pointless.

Answer 2

It would much depend on what you mean by "mind games," wouldn't it? Most involve dishonesty in some form or other. So what mind games were you playing that got you a positive response?

Lying about how you feel, for example? Many men say "I love you" very easily, because they mean "You are female and I love females." Others find it unreasonably hard to say, because they feel it means "I will do anything for you and love you forever and marry you and support you and your children and put up with whatever you do to me."

It is very, very hard for men and women to be completely honest with one another, but one way to start is to allow one another private space, silence, the right to not say too much. You don't have to lie if you are allowed to remain silent when no answer seems to be a good one. Or to use lines like, "I don't know how to answer that," or "What can I say?" to avoid answering, where necessary.

Steve used to say "I don't have a good answer," which I translated as "you wouldn't like the truth; don't ask for it." I was usually smart enough to take that and not ask more. Usually.

Answer 3

What an individual believes they want, and what that same individual actually wants... differs due to social conditioning. A conditioning to give answers that comply with current social correlations. In this specific case, the woman gives a trained response, without actually evaluating her true beliefs.

For instance, their are many people who say...
"I don't care what anyone thinks about me."
In reality, most... (or perhaps everyone) cares what other people think about them. A tough guise caused by blind conditioning.

Go after a woman who TRULY knows what she wants. A woman which has evaluated herself, and presents herself honestly.

Answer 4

Well adjusted women don't respond to "mind games" - honest. If you think they do you're hanging around the wrong women (unless you like that type of thing and don't mind someone isn't completely well adjusted).