What's your best way to deal with telemarketers?

Question

Please, be creative. I don't like telemarketers and love to mess with them when they call. I need new ideas. Best one gets 10 points. (but, nothing obscene or gross)

Answer 1

When they ask "How are you today?" Tell them! "I'm
so glad you asked because no one these days seems to
care, and I have all these problems; my arthritis is
acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died..."
If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, ask
them to spell their name. Then ask them to spell the
company name. Then ask them where it is located.
Continue asking them personal questions or questions
about their company for as long as necessary.
Cry out in surprise, "Judy! Is that you? Oh my God!
Judy, how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Judy
a few brief moments of pause as she tries to figure out
where the hell she could know you from.
If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family
and Friends plan, reply, in as SINISTER a voice as you can,
"I don't have any friends... would you be my friend?"If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for
bankruptcy and you could sure use some money.
Tell the telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask
them if they will give you their HOME phone number so you
can call them back. When the telemarketer explains that they
cannot give out their HOME number, you say "I guess you don't
want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The telemarketer
will agree and you say, "Now you know how I feel!"
Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon, playing a joke.
"Come on Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how's ya been?"
Tell them to talk V-E-R-Y V-E-R-Y S-L-O-W-L-Y, because
you want to write down EVERY WORD.

Answer 2

I use the line from Mrs. Doubtfire: I am job. That leaves them thinking and when they repeat the whole bit I answer again: I am job, by the third time I answer I am job they start getting either nervous or annoyed.
What I often do as well is answer in Spanish something like Bueno? Bueno? most of the time they hang up and try again later, and if they speak Spanish I just go to Pronto? Pronto? which is Italian, by then they are annoyed as well.

Answer 3

The propose became into sturdy approximately registering you telephone quantity. We did and very seldom get calls from telemarketers. till now we registered our numbers, whilst a telemarketer spoke of as, i could answer and tell them i became into investigating a homicide and needed their call, what relationship that they had with the relatives and reason they have been calling...an abrupt carry close-up became into continually their reaction. you may sign in all your telephone numbers with: The national do not call Registry provides a decision approximately no rely if to acquire telemarketing calls at residing house. maximum telemarketers shouldn't call your quantity as quickly because it is been on the registry for 31 days. in the event that they do, you may record a criticism at this web site. you may sign in your place or cellular telephone for unfastened. sturdy success!

Answer 4

Start speaking foreign languages (make up some stuff).

Say hello, hello, hello and hold on, they will hang up and try to call someone else but u will have the line tied up for a few minutes, they will hang up at least 10 times lol.

SCREAM "Tommy stop that", then appoligize, then do it again over and over and over lol.

Or just answer and hang up. (that is what most everyone does).

Answer 5

ok some of the ones i have used are
1- speak in a different language
2- protend to have the same accent as them
3 - repeat everything they say to you
4- have a tape recording of that television commercial selling pro active soloution with the voice of Vanessa Williams and just play that when ever they ask a question.
5- tell them that they have just called a goverment phone number and you want to know how they got this number -they usaully hang up pretty fast after you say that.

Answer 6

Easiest thing to do is probably to say, very politely, "Can you hang on one sec? Let me turn down the TV." Then just put the phone down on the table and walk away. Eats up their time.

If you're good at pretending, you could pretend to be a 94-year-old person who's delighted to have an audience and insists on rambling on and on and on about "the good old days" and doesn't follow what the person is saying at all.

Answer 7

I had a childhood friend who's mom was great with telemarketers. Whatever they were selling, she'd throw some comment out that they couldn't react to. If they were selling encyclopedias, she'd say "No thanks, my family's illiterate". Once a company was selling service contracts for the washer/dryer and she told them her washboard works just fine. You have to be quick though, or you lose the effect. She just popped out answers like it was nothing! Funny lady...

Answer 8

I love it when they call trying to sell me magazines or newspapers because I always tell them I would love to buy a subscription to their magazine/newspaper but then I would ask them if they are going to teach me how to read. They usually apologize their @ss off and then hang up.

Answer 9

I just tell them that I'm busy, but if they could give me their name and # I would call them back. They usually hang up. Or just ask a bunch of idiotic questions. Either work.

Answer 10

I repeat everything they say....they hang up real quick or ask for an adult..then I say "hold on" then come back ( or get someone)and do the exact same thing.