I'm 3 months pregnant and me and my baby daddy are going through alot or should I say I'm going through alot. But anyway we both decided to keep the baby. We argure to much I mean it seems like he likes to start them. On friday he called me at 1am I was like what wrong with you calling me this time of the night why didn't you call me early. He said he was waiting for me to call him being that he don't have long distance but he uses his mother cell phone. Then he ask me did I hook up with any of my partners trying to be a ***. Just was saying off the wall type s*it. I said no I'm still on way you calling me so late he said well since you want to b*t*h then how bout I don't call you know more I said how bout it and hung up. And I haven't call him and he haven't call me. I have to focus on me and my child because stress isn't good for the baby and he tends do get me that way so I had to eliminate it. But my question is was I wrong and what should I do I don't want to be with him anymore.
2006-11-12 15:13:50 · 11 answers · asked by Scooby_doo06 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
It is almost scary how your story sounds like my own. When I found out I was pregnant, I too, was not going to have her. I didn't talk to my b/f, i was going to hide it from him. I just didn't know if I wanted to be with him for the rest of my life. That way of thinking came from my family. I decided to keep the baby, he was happy, I was going to have his child, I went through hell for the next 8 months. He worked at a bar, and even after he got off he would not get home till like 5a.m. I'm sad to say, I am still with this man, after 6 years. I have never forgiven him for how he acted. He said he was sorry, and that he just started to freak out, because his whole life was going to change. I am miserable. My advice to you, PLEASE, if you don't love this man, and you know you are not going to be happy with him, leave, in the long run, that is something that will be good for your baby. My girl is 5, I wish every day, I would of left so long ago. If you stay and you don't want to be there, you'll start to feel dead inside. I'm going back to school and hoping when my girl gets a little older she will understand that mommy and daddy love her so very much. But it wasn't meant to be. I hope you can figure this out. You can mail me if you like, or need to talk. I wish you all the best. Don't make the same mistake I did. Please!!!
2006-11-12 15:27:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well there are systems in place to help you. A judge can give you legal custody and set up child support that the father will be obligated to pay. He will likely get either split custody or visitation. The guy is going to be a part of your life for a long time, so best to get along if possible, but of course you don't have to be with him! He doesn't exactly sound like a good catch.
If you really want my two cents, the better decision would be to give the baby a life with a mom AND a dad who are married. If you're willing to look at what is truly best for your baby, try http://www.itsaboutlove.org - Good luck.
2006-11-12 16:48:06 · answer #2 · answered by thyladydulcinea 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are in a position that all woman dread. Being deserted and left to take care of your own.
Majority of men have a nasty way of getting what they want and once they get it they want something else and you are left with the responsibility of a child.
I feel for you i really do, the same thing happened to my mother and i saw all the hurt, struggle and pain she had to cope with everyday with 2 young siblings by a man who said and i quote "babies don't pay bills'.
You need to be more strong now than you have ever been not just for you but for your baby, there is only one persona child needs in it's life and that is a loving, caring, protective mother which is you.
If you do not wish to be with this person anymore be prepared.
It aint easy to bring up a child on your own but that aint no reason why you should stay with him.
Most of the time a man will deny that he is the father and accuse you of sleeping with ever tom, dick and harry there is only because they dread the thought of being tied down.
They are quick enough to put it in but aint quick enough to deal with there responsibilities.
I admire your strength and courage and so will others as will he.
2006-11-12 15:31:55 · answer #3 · answered by nade 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Honey you did the right thing. If you take him back it will only get worse. I would make the break now. Your baby needs a loving environment not one fill with name calling and friction. I think you will be a wonderful mother. you are already concerned about your baby's future. I will say a prayer for you. and the Lord will bless you for caring so much about your baby to be. Congratulations and God Be with you both.I will also pray for him that he will change his ways. He needs the Lords help also, as we all do.
2006-11-12 15:41:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing.He just wants to have you chase him and beg him to be good and be with you.Sounds like he coulda been drinking or something.My boyfriend[now husband]use to do the same thing.AFTER he finished running around and got bored he had time for me.But just to see how much he missed or what I had done all night or maybe if I had been in a place to bust him out for something he had done.You did good.Dont worry about it and just move on.
2006-11-12 15:43:41 · answer #5 · answered by migamw 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think you are wrong. You have a baby to care about now not his games. Sounds like he is trying to Control you and is mad that he isnt or Cant. You really dont need him . When you have your child you will look into her/Him eyes and realize you only want the best for child. Not saying not having father there just saying you are going to be a role model and dont settle for something you dont want just to have it . You only live once.,
2006-11-12 15:30:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to do what is right for you and your baby. But you also need to remember, unless you get the courts involved -- he has just as much right to be a father to your child as you have to be a mother. You two do not need to be together, but you do need to be civil to each other for the welfare of your child.
2006-11-12 15:19:57 · answer #7 · answered by Just Me 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you answered your on question sweetie you don't want him anymore and you were not wrong. he needs to know you are a woman he don't call you out of your name he wouldn't like it if someone disrespected the women in his life his mom grandma sister so he shouldn't do it to the woman that is having his baby all you can do is pray and ask god to help you good luck sweetie
2006-11-12 15:20:16 · answer #8 · answered by k2u 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are never wrong.What happen is,that he show you; that he does not want to take responsibilities about your baby.If he love you indeed,he never will fight with you.If you think in your heart that you will be better as a single mother,then do it.God bless you every day in your life,and God bless your baby.Good luck.
2006-11-12 15:46:02 · answer #9 · answered by cobrasnake 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you did the right thing. i wish i was as strong as you are, bc i know is hard. u gotta do was best for you and your baby n u know what dat is. u dun need extra stress in your life, u betta off with out him.
2006-11-12 17:08:24 · answer #10 · answered by geovanna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋