Men only! Does a divorced Mother with two kids scare you.?

Question

I was woundering if a women with children is somehow less dateable than that of someone with no kids. If so or if not I would like to here your point of view on it.

Answer 1

You want an honest answer to this question ? coming from a middle class man myself, This is known as a ready made family, No not at all, most guys would be the luckest man on earth knowing they don't have to face all the extra problems that comes with their wife being Pregnant and the extra doctor bills that come with it. you can actually get on with the important part of having a family and knowing you already have children will be an added blessing to them both on raising the children together. this is a package deal and most men would grab it in a heart beat because he can love you and the children at the same time and feel the gift of knowing he's important to you all as well.

Answer 2

Are you less dateable? No! However, if I am a single male without a care in the world and no familial responsibilities then it will be less likely that I will understand your situation and the priorities that you have in life. Example: I was just invited to fly out to NY for the weekend I now have to consider if this is your weekend with the kids before accepting. Or are the kids sick and you don't want to leave them for the weekend.

However, if I were a mature smart man who can see all of your wonderful qualities and realize that I would rather spend a weekend at home with you than alone in NY, it would not bother me.

Bottom line, it depends on where the individual is in life. The man that loves you will love you and your family and will want to be a part of that family.

Meanwhile - Enjoy this crazy ride called life, love your children but never forget to love yourself too...

Answer 3

Ready made families scare alot of men away because of the possible responsibility of taking over another guys family and knowing that a mother has obligations and responsibilities for her children and may not be as readily available as a single lady. This doesnt mean that you as a mom are not dateable material but does mean that your time is valuable and may not be as free to do spontaneous dates. There are alot of men out there willing to take on ready made families but may not be the best suitable for you so you may have to lower your standards a little but then watch out for the many undesirables out there too. Good luck

Answer 4

She would not scare me but the fact there’s an ex lurking would. Fathers and mothers alike are not very keen on seeing someone else telling their children what to do. There’s also the emotional bond between the ex’s that concerns me.

I personally think there are plenty of women out there that have never been married, widowed with or without children that would be ahead of a divorced woman with or without children.

If it was a booty call relationship that’s one thing but to be serious with a divorced woman… Ooh, scary indeed.

Answer 5

It depends. Of course kids have a cost, and they will usually have a kind of relationship with their father that you can never have with them, but the more challenging aspect of these kind of relationships is the the baggage the mother--who must deal with her ex-husband because she has kids--carries from her marriage.

If the mother is carrying a lot of resentment toward her ex-husband, then you can wind up feeling like you are sharing her with her ex, and she can project her insecurities over that failed marriage onto your relationship with her.

I've been down that path, and it's a hard thing to pick up on in the early days of a relationship sometimes because people put on their best faces when they are starting a new relationship. I say you have to be on the lookout for such residual issues early on and be ready to walk away sooner rather than later if there are too many red flags.

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Answer 6

I will not do it again. While I have a tremendous amount of respect for single mothers the children end up running the relationship. Relationships can be hard enough and when you have to please three people in the relationship it is impossible.
Me and my ex got along great until I let her 17year old daughter move into our home. We were divorced within a 11/2 after that.

Answer 7

Hello...Well I am a mother of 2 and single..
I have been in about 6 dates before!
It's just how you express yourself and talk about you!
You my not brag about how you could handle 2 kids
and how you are a single mother!
That won't help...at all
Well a woman with kids is more date-able just as a woman with kids..{that's what i say to me all the time i go hang out}
Take these tips..the y well work...
hope you like my answer.
P.S This answer was giving in a vary way.And men are like little kids you have to find the way around them.

Answer 8

Mostly. You will be bringing alot of baggage into the relationship. You are not going to be nearly as free and flexible as a single woman with no kids. Also a nice guy might feel like he is wasting your time if he just wants to date and isn't looking for a wife and ready made family.

A guy could really dig your kids, but ex-issues are going to be a giant pain.

Answer 9

Scare? No.
Concern? Yes.
It raises a lot of questions, especially involving the father of the children.
What is his involvment. Is he a help or a hinderance? Has he "let go" of the relationship or is he going to slash my tires?

My concers with the kids would be how much wil they accept me?
Will they try to sabbotage the relationship?
How well behaved are they?

Answer 10

Not at all! If I love the mother enough, I would work to gain the respect of the kids! I would want to have a happy family with all the members or else nothing would really work out!