your partner doesnt want to have children while you want
(but except that you love each other very very much and you have a great time together)
2006-11-12 08:00:17 · 18 answers · asked by girl24gr 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Children are an important decision....discuss...
2006-11-13 23:53:25 · answer #1 · answered by Juliette 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ahhh..touchy subject..I broke up with my girlfriend because she wanted kids, I didnt, of course though, I have 2 children from before..and at the end we just didnt get along..in your case...You really dont want to have children with someone who doesnt. Just because you love someone doesnt make it right, some people are selfish and love their life the way it is, nothing is wrong with that. Having children is a blessing but many relationship breakdown because of it. Maybe you have to look further, look at his past family history, financial issues, or just the fact that some people arent meant to be parents (and there are some that should have never been)
Eventually - you will have to make a decision - and which ever direction you go - may it bless you with what YOU want also. If you want children - then maybe you have to realize that LOVE is not just enough - you need that PLUS...and dont blame yourself for it...I have 2 kids - and I am happy to have them..just now they are much bigger, Id rather not start over again..unless my soulmate appears
2006-11-12 16:05:43 · answer #2 · answered by rhdtv2002 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to decide how important having children is to you, and if you would be willing to forego that to be with this guy long term (or at least forego it with him).
I am female and have never wanted kids. My first husband did want more (he had one when we met) and that was the ultimate reason he used for our divorce after 7-1/2 yrs of marriage (he knew my view all along).
Make sure you and any potential long term parters are on the same page, or can get there...or it could end the relationship...people tend to take having kids seriously and those that desire them often aren't happy until they've fulfilled that desire.
2006-11-12 16:04:00 · answer #3 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your partner is simply not ready for off-spring and the responsibility that comes with...and you love him...respect his choice for a while. He might very well change his mind in the future. If you try to trap him into parenthood, you will only lose him. If he never comes around to the idea, you might find yourself in the market for someone new who shares your same interest on the subject.
2006-11-12 16:04:54 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Then I would have to do some serious thinking about I wanted in life. If children were that important to me and there was no way he was going to give me any then I would have no choice but to leave him. Of course I would still want him to be a special part of my life and stay friends. If he truly loved me he would understand that.
2006-11-12 16:04:31 · answer #5 · answered by Candace T 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to decide whats more important to you. Can you live your life with your partner and never have kids, if that's ok with you, then you should go on the way you are now, if you can't imagine your life without ever having kids, then you need to either ask him to consider it and maybe convince him, or move on, because you won't be happy if you two don't agree on that topic, that's very important part of life.
2006-11-12 16:03:14 · answer #6 · answered by wantstoknow 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a really tough situation. Do you know why he doesn't want kids? Picture your future and if not having kids is something you'd be OK with then there isn't a problem...but if it's something you really want perhaps you should somehow come up with a solution or move on. Good luck.
2006-11-12 16:02:39 · answer #7 · answered by Heather 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have a really hard decision to make I would think long and hard on what is the most important thing to you him or children .
No one can make this kind of decision for you .
2006-11-12 16:07:24 · answer #8 · answered by Geedebb 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is one of those things that will destroy a relationship. If he doesn't want kids and you do, you will not be able to convince him otherwise. If he does have kids with you, he will resent you for making him do something he did not want to do. The best thing to do is be honest, and see what happens.
2006-11-12 16:07:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never force parenhood on someone. It will make your partner resent you. If you want kids, you'll need to be with someone who has the same goals as you do.
2006-11-12 16:26:03 · answer #10 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋