my boyfriend just talked to me and said that he feels like the relationship is one sided, like he's putting in effort and im not. the problem is that im in college (he is too) but im uberly involved and don't spend enough time w/ him, im in a sorority, radio dj, work, and homework too, but i need some advice as to what i can do w/ him that will be fun for the both of us, or just how to become more involved in what he does, im not self centered, but im really independent and like to do things on my own. what should i do?
2006-11-12 04:56:03 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Coral, your boyfriend is right and I think it is admirable for him to come to you to discuss it. A lot of times when one or the other busies him/herself with activities that do not involve the partner, it tears the relationship down. He wants to do more things with you and since he has brought it up, you could sit down with him and find out what he is interested in doing. This might include just spending "quiet" time alone once in awhile. You can still be independent in the relationship, but you really need to work him into your schedule. It is really only fair since it takes two people to make a relationship and in order for it to grow, it takes both people to make an effort.
You both are in college and that alone could take up a lot of your free time. With you being in a sorority, I would think that doubles more time that your boyfriend isn't going to get. Homework and work are important and so it is really surprising the time you have for radio DJ. You'll have to look at your schedule and make it a point to fit him in. You must know some of the activities HE is interested in. Find out his schedule and you guys could alternate doing what you like and what he likes to keep it fair.
Good luck. He sounds like a great guy. :)
2006-11-12 05:09:28 · answer #1 · answered by terryoulboub 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you have to decide if you really want him in your life. If the answer is yes, you might need to cut down on some of the things you are doing, or cut down on the time you spend doing them. He needs more of your time. Get involved in something he likes doing instead so you can spend time together. Maybe he could get involved in something you are doing. Regardless, you need to set sometime aside for him. If you don't, you'll lose him.
2006-11-12 04:59:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As much as you prolly don't want to hear it, it sounds like you don't have time for a boyfriend right now. You need to find some common interests between the two of you and make time for them.
2006-11-12 05:03:14 · answer #3 · answered by ♥dream_angel♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Set out time at least every other day to spend with your boyfriend. This will help you a lot.
2006-11-12 05:02:46 · answer #4 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's good that you're focusing on school (well, the homework part).
Just have a set day(s) to spend time with him every week.
Let him know that you care and are willing to spend time with him.
2006-11-12 05:12:05 · answer #5 · answered by ( Kelly ) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Schedule date nights .
2006-11-12 06:12:48 · answer #6 · answered by Geedebb 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
one day go to the movies with him
2006-11-12 05:04:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋