Been friends for years. although got megga problems myself, put my back out to help her through a morgage, (work or an IFA) ran down in torrential rain on day off to fax details to solicitor, walked her daughter's pups while she was at work cos daughter on holiday, tidied her house, (she didn't ask me to, goodness of my heart), her internet broke down, she asked me to book tickets for her Mum and Daughter to go on holiday at my work place, I said ok, and did. Then come my birthday, totally on my own, no guy, her my mate, son's doing their own thing, she never asked me if I would like to go out. Then when I told her why I wasn't phoning or texting, cos I was upset that she didn't ask me to go out! I got a very nice text (NOT) saying I couldn't leave everything up to her, It's my birthday and I should organise it if I want to do anything. What's the rating of this friend please. X
2006-11-12 04:42:45 · 16 answers · asked by RUTH M 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
sounds like a ***** to me
2006-11-12 04:45:56 · answer #1 · answered by mschmitty920 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'd rate her 5/10.
A good friend should at least ask if you've got anything planned for your birthday! Did she even give you a card/gift??
But on the flip side to that argument, there's no written rule saying that friends have to provide unconditional love and be there every time you need them.
When we are younger friends often mean the world to us; but as we get older many other things get in the way: work, partners, family etc.
It sounds like you are just one thing on a list of priorities for your friend, rather than her main priority. And to be honest that's how it is for most of us, with most of our friends.
What you do now is up to you: if you don't want to stop being her friend, you'll just have to learn to live with her lack of consideration this time - now you've explained to her that it's upset you, she hopefully won't do it again! But if you are so upset that you think your friendship may not recover, then just break off contact for a while and see how you feel in a month's time.
Good luck honey x
2006-11-12 07:36:12 · answer #2 · answered by Kat69 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Self-centered wench. I'd give 'er a text . . .
Don't be angry at her, tho', if you share blame in keeping an unhealthy relationship alive. Did her behavior surprise you? Had she always, in the past, been supportive of your interests, your feelings, your concerns? Was she a good listener when you needed one? Did she know how important giving you attention on your special day is to you? Are you expecting her to commit some kind of mistake like this, as in, you kinda' saw this coming?
If the relationship doesn't have a healthy future in store for you (and instead promises 'more of the same'), acknowledge what was good in it for you (an opportunity to enjoy things you wouldn't have, the chance to give from your heart, etc.) before you move on.
I think your job might be to learn how to avoid a repetition of this in even a different friendship. Were there 'red flags' you didn't pay attention to, things you recognise in retrospect which could've warned you about your friend's selfishness/shortsightednes?
If, in order to show support to your friend you have to neglect something important to your own self, be wary, the price may be too high.
Good luck.
2006-11-12 05:18:37 · answer #3 · answered by Zeera 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your boyfriend could desire to be incredibly solid buddies with this guy OR He could have the hots for her? i'm sorry to assert that yet i can't think of of why he could be so ragin at you eh? Like cmon what you reported wasn't that hurtful grew to become into it? See he would not see what you reported he sees it as somebody dissin somebody he likes. Cos shes in all likelihood purely a slutty bimbo.
2016-12-17 08:50:31 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a very one sided friendship to me. Its ok when you are doing things for her but she doesn't seem to think about you.
Ok maybe she was waiting for you to say something , but if she knew it was your birthday she should have ask you what you were doing for it ,if she was your best mate. When its one of my mates and it their birthday that the first thing we ask, and if they have nothing plannned we plan to do something with them
2006-11-13 01:26:54 · answer #5 · answered by big k 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if my friend said that to me i wouldnt not be very happy although i dont like surprises i would of loved to have gone out with my best mate if you know what i mean i think you should sit her down and tell her how inconsiderate she is and remind her how much you are puttin your **** on the line for her all the time it seems to me like you do too much for her and you get nothing in return which is not right xx
2006-11-12 04:50:24 · answer #6 · answered by jaymus 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I wouldnt take it too much to heart. It sounds like she has a busy life and doesnt place as much importance on birthdays as you do. Think carefully - good friends are hard to find xx
2006-11-12 04:46:51 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Obviously shes the kind of friend that loves everybody running around for her but is too lazy to even think about anyone else.
You're too good for her and she knows it. shes a *****. and she should be the one thanking you for all that you've done and apoligising to you.
2006-11-12 19:25:49 · answer #8 · answered by Lady Claire - Hates Bigotry 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you call that a friend! I dont think so, find someone who will give as much as you give!
2006-11-13 01:25:01 · answer #9 · answered by I~Love~Baileys 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she's right. it was your birthday and if you wanted to do something with her, you should have asked her if she would like to come with you. none fo my friends ask my out for my birthday. people usually think that you have other plans on your birthday. if you wanted to do something in particular with her, you should have asked.
2006-11-12 04:50:47 · answer #10 · answered by redpeach_mi 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
if she was a good friend she would have kept in touch and asked u if you wanted to go out for your birthday.
i would say not a good friend
2006-11-12 04:46:20 · answer #11 · answered by magiclady2007 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋