Can u give me some good jokes or riddles for publishing in a magazine ?

Answer 1

Three men were applying for the same job as a detective. One was a Sardarji, one was Jewish, and one was Italian. The chief decided to ask each applicant just one question and base his decision upon that answer. When the Jewish man arrived for his interview, the chief asked him, "Who killed Jesus Christ?" The Jewish man answered without hesitation. "The Romans killed him." The chief thanked him and he left. When the Italian man arrived for his interview, the chief asked the Same question. He replied "Jesus was killed by the Jews." Again, the chief thanked the man who then left. Finally the Sardarji arrived for his interview, he was asked the same question. He thought for a long time, before saying,"Could I have some time to think about it?" The chief said,"OK, but get back to me tomorrow." When the Sardarji arrived home, his wife asked "How was the interview ?". Sardarji replied, "Great, I got the job, and I'm already investigating a murder.

Talking about those days when there were no mosquito repellents and we had to spend sleepless nights. Sardarji was also experiencing the same every time. he tries to sleep,one mosquito comes and disturbs his sleep with a sound "guooonn, guooonn." He gets very irritated. He tries to cover his ear but the problem remains persistent. Ultimately he gets up and catches the mosquito in his hand. He is very kind and not for the blood shed but still wanted to take revenge. Happy as he is now starts singing a lullaby and says "so ja machchar, bete so ja". After some time he finds the mosquito falling into deep sleep in his hands. So he goes near it and says "Guoooonnnnn, guoooonnnnn."

Answer 2

One boy was idle. His mother took him to a man and requested him to give him some job for the boy. On way she had advised his son that when you find your employer in a happy mood, ask for increase in salary. The man said leave the boy here, you can go and let me check him how intelligent he is. The mother went back. The man told the boy to go the shop nearby and get honey for five rupees and loose ghee for five rupees. He gave him ten rupees. The man kept quiet and was watching him unawarely. The boy searched here and there. There was nothing left outside. He noticed a cup board half open. He searched in and found a syrup bottle and an ounce glass. He took the ounce glass -- the top of which measures one full ounce and the bottom of which measures half ounce. The boy thought he can collect the both the items in this and took the ounce glass and went to the shop and orderd for honey for 5 rupees and loose ghee for five rupees. The shop fellow served honey first. The boy showed the ounce glass in his hand and received the honey. The shopman asked him ok i will give you now the loose ghee, how you will take? The boy turned the ounce glass upside down and said now put the loose ghee here. As he turned the honey fell on the floor completely. The shopman was aghasted. Poor boy, you have dropped the honey and wasted. The boy said it is ok, now put the loose ghee on the other side of the ounce glass as the boy was holding it. On his returning from the shop the boy realised that at least we should reach this loose ghee to the employer. He reached home. The man asked the boy very good, what is it, the boy said it is loose ghee. Good. where is the honey. The boy again turned the glass and said here it is and thus dropped the loose ghee also there. The employer was enjoying the foolishness of the boy who dropped the honey at the shop and when asked for honey he dropped the loose ghee and he was loudly laughing. The boy said that sir my mother advised me when my employer is in a happy mood to ask for increase in salary!

Answer 3

These are Jokes from the ahajokes.com (You can surf there too for more jokes) If you use them for publicatin, you have to cite the source.

Dealing with a juggler
Juggler, driving to his next performance, was stopped by the police. "What are those knives doing in your car?" asked the officer.

"I juggle them in my act."

"Oh yeah?" says the cop. "Let's see you do it." So the juggler starts tossing and juggling the knives.

A guy driving by sees this and says, "Wow, am I glad I quit drinking. Look at the test they're making you do now!"

Why must we learn this?
One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med student rudely interrupted to ask, "Why do we have to learn this pointless information"

"To save lives." the professor responded quickly and continued the lecture.

A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?" he persisted.

"It keeps the ignoramuses like you out of medical school," replied the professor.

Answer 4

okay, here are some


~ A guy in the military had 5 kids, and everytime he went away his wife would complain that she never got any peace cuz the kids always wanted to sleep with her. Before heading out on one mission, the man gathered his kids in the livingroom and sternly told them that they were all old enough to sleep in their own bedrooms. Upon his return, his eight year old son lept into his arms, and oblivious to the airport crowd around them proudly announced
"dad, you'll be so happy, no one slept with mom while you were gone!"


Hear about the guy who lost his whole left side? He's all right now!

Answer 5

Do an editorial on present day storage band developments and song genres they are doing on your area, and checklist the coming near near exhibits places and costs. I dont comprehend what age you're conversing approximately .. you mentioned college toddler i dont comprehend you in case you advise extreme college or what.. i'm assuming extreme college. So song is solid.

Answer 6

If you're planning to get them published, they should be original -- meaning you've got to write them yourself. Otherwise there could be copyright infringement problems.

Answer 7

Hear about the guy who lost his whole left side? He's all right now!