my friend, who ive known for 6 years now and always had a crush on, she split up with her man in febuary this year and since then ive been helping out her an her two children, ive been gettng very close to her. i have strong felings but she has said before she just doesnt feel that way about me. now she has been seeing a man she met on a dating site, i havent met him yet but she tells me all about what he and her have done, now shes talking about going on the pill to take the relationship further and i feel so lonely and hurt inside because i love her and i wish i could be with her. she said before that the only thing that could stop us being freinds was if i was jealous, and im incredidbly jealoues and sad that this is happening. should i ell he how i feel even though it mite meen the end of freindship, or should i pretend to be ok with it, because i feel so uncomfortable that some man is doing things with her and we can never be as close again as we have been while she was single?
2006-11-11 22:33:57 · 9 answers · asked by clinton_b1980 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
id rather notlose her as a friend
2006-11-11 23:31:53 · update #1
of course i want he to be happy, more than anything else in the world, but i feel awkward listeningto her tell me about what she's been doing. ive began to cut myself because i feel i am bad for feeling this way.
2006-11-12 00:00:29 · update #2
she is also the only real friend i have, if i lost her i couldnt go on, but i love her dearly
2006-11-12 04:16:50 · update #3
I would have to tell her how I truly feel. Even though it may cause u to loose Ur friendship with her its best to open and honest with her. She may come to realize that she likes u for more than a friend to but no matter what route u take theres always going to be a downfall. U could loose her if u tell her or u could not say anything to her and when she goes to tell u what happened on her date u could easily say " U know glad u had a good time and all but really care to hear about it" If she comes up and says why are u acting this way just tell her that u don't feel good or something. U need to find someone who really likes u. U do need to quit cutting yourself though no woman is worth causing yourself pain over no matter how much u love them. So stop that right away. That's just crazy. Hoped this helped u.
2006-11-12 01:14:04 · answer #1 · answered by crystal 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your first mistake was to continue torturing yourself after telling her how you really felt about her. If you were helping her financially, in an attempt to win her over, you now know that doesn't work! You just can't buy love. If I were you, I would not give up on her totally, but back yourself out of the situation at hand. If she is interested in someone else, let him buy her groceries for a while. I don't mean for that to sound mean. But she may eventually come to appreciate you more, once she's lost the benefit of your special friendship. If you really do care for her as you say, be patient, because I think she will eventually come around. If not,then hey, you did what you could, and there's someone out there that will love you for the generous person you are!
2006-11-11 22:56:31 · answer #2 · answered by rebecca_sld 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are in a very destructive situation. I agree with the other poster that the only rational course for you is to tell her exactly how you feel about her, and why this means you cannot be a friend as you have been in the past.
She has said how she feels about you, so it is unlikely that this will be enough to make her come to you, but at least it will remove you from a situation that is causing you pain and will go on causing you pain.
2006-11-11 22:45:08 · answer #3 · answered by langdonrjones 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
why are you scared? are you in probability? what i favor to do is watch a gooey love movie or a comedy even as im scared. pay interest for your ipod or mp3 cd participant or inspite of. take a relaxing bathtub with the radio cranked up. sing something. flow and are available across a chum you may carry out with
2016-11-29 01:41:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her you want more than friendship and it's painful for you to be wit her when she does not reciprocate those feelings, then stay away. You are torturing yourself. Once you're gone she may realize she has romantic feelings for you. If not you are still better off being away from that situation
2006-11-11 22:37:34 · answer #5 · answered by Mica 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, life's that way
Sometimes a crush is just a crush. I think it's better if you really move onto true loves?
It's a suggestion.
Anyways are you jelouse of that man or are you just feeling sorry for yourself coz your single?
2006-11-11 22:57:34 · answer #6 · answered by Lit' Ol' Me 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will lose her as a friend if you continue this way. She has made it very clear to you that she doesn't feel the way you do. Find you someone who will appreciate your love.
2006-11-11 23:35:47 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her exactly what you have posted on here.
If it's to uncomfortable to tell her in person, then write her a letter or an e-mail.
Hope this helps.
2006-11-11 22:56:45 · answer #8 · answered by eyes_of_iceblue 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DO U WANT TO LOOSE HER AS A FREND
2006-11-11 23:28:03 · answer #9 · answered by jellyswiss 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋