How do i kick start my life back into gear, feel so down and brassed of with life?

Question

53, and wondering where to go from here, any one got anyu sensible ideas.............

Answer 1

In my experience going out on the town every night is not the whole answer. that is only a short term solution. You may only end up more depressed and feeling guilty for what you did the night before. I am going through a divorce and did feel very much the same way, so I changed my job found myself a new partner and tried to look for the positives in life.I did have to look hard but they are out there. This may not be the answer you are looking for
but it is what worked for me. Take a look at my 360 and see what I mean. Best wishes and I hope you can get out of the rut. And remember, you are only as old as the person you want to be.

Answer 2

You need to build up your confidence.
Get a job as a bus driver. When I was training I was paired with a lady who lacked confidence and the instructor would get me to do something like back the bus around a corner and then the lady would have to do it. Last I heard the lady was an instructor herself.
Many people think the job is stressful, but it's all about your point of view: If there is congestion, that's the city council's responsibility to fix it; if the bus breaks down, then that's the responsibility of the mechanics; if people don't pay the right fare, that's the inspectors responsibility; if the bus runs late, that's the schedulers responsibility to fix. In short, you can put the blame for almost every eventuality onto someone else.

Answer 3

You are at the point in your life where you begin to take stock of things.If you have children, they have probably moved on and begun their own lives. If you don't have children, you may have been bereaved of family members or friends. The business of getting on with life calms a little at our age, giving us time to think. I am the same age as you. I have reared five children, lived through two broken marraiges, had various careers. I have also been in the place where you seem to be at least twice.The most recent I am still coming to terms with. I guess we can't expect life to run smoothly all the time. you don't say what has happened to cause these feelings. might you be depressed and be unaware of it? Depression doesn't always mean you have to take medication. Sometimes the sheer volume of everyday stuff wears us down to the extent that our psychic energy is exhausted. We just can't do any more.To get this one out of the way first, maybe have a chat with your doctor. It could be your hormones. Are you going through the menopause or just beyond it? there are loads of products out there, supplements you can take to help with everyday energy levels. Are you financially strapped? If so, then treating yourself to things might not be an option, but you can do things that cost very little, just for you. At least twice a week, do something for you. Take a walk in a park, sit in the sunshine, look at ducks on a pond, listen to birdsong. Yes, I know it's winter, but that's part of the enjoyment. When I was very poor and my kids were all young and needy together, I used wander around shops looking at things I couldn't buy. One day I saw this really pretty bone china cup; It was a pound. It was all I had . I bought that cup and made a little ceremony out of drinking my tea out of it every day. I felt i was special enough to deserve it. I still have that cup 13 years on. It still symbolises hope for me. Can you take up some sort of course as a mature student ?Did you ever have dreams when you were younger of being something? Even going to schools and colleges to ask can be an adventure. you don't have to act on the information, but it just might trigger something inside you. Have you someone you can talk to about things? If there is no-one you feel can listen, find yourself a good counsellor. you are worth it. It will not stay this way forever, nothing does. Make yourself do something , for yourself. then watch events start to unfold. I wish you well.

Answer 4

Well Im 57 and crashed out last year but slowly slowly im cominback First dont wallow , I volenteered in a hospital met new people and could go at my speed as the boss was desperate for freehelp (Ilive inIsrael so things may be different in the uk) Education is a good idea and exercise is really really good
For me most off all is the belief there is a creator and I was put into this world for a reason..Also finally and importantly a supportive family or friends is without compare

Answer 5

Keep a diary, have a good rant in it each day, say what was good and bad about the day and what you are going to achieve tomorrow. Get fit, take speed walks, for a few miles a day. Keep a list of things to do each day. Find a course you are interested in (Art/Cookery/home electrics), also a GREAT way of making new friends! Last thing at night, just before sleep takes you, tell yourself that from now on you will think positively. Don't wait for the situation to change to make you happy, have a smile every day.

Answer 6

Deffinatly a new haircut, completely different from what you've had over the past few years. Try finding a group to join, maybe a reading or knitting club (knitting is now the "IN" thing). If you have anything you've wanted to do that you've been prevented for, like traveling or skydiving, go ahead and do it. I think the main thing is to stay moving and active and interested in your life. Just have as much fun as you can so that you'll know in your heart that your life is going on and becoming better than it was with him.

Answer 7

First off, you need to know the blahs will pass. (It may be hormonal---are you in "change of life", which is a massive biochemical adjustment?)
Second of all, you need to know the blahs will pass.
All the answers about travel, new interests, working out, etc. from respondents above, are good ones.
Third of all, you need to know the blahs will pass!
The one suggestion I'd add is, get involved with helping others. This is the best, sure-fire cure for the blahs and the blues.
So, hang in and soldier on, time will pass and things will brighten!

Answer 8

The answer to life is not changing the way you look, or the people you hang out with, unless these things in particular are what's bringing you down.

First, figure out what it is that truly makes you happy and find a way to do that as much as possible.

Second get something accomplished every day. I mean it, every day. There's a word in psychology for it: mastery activity. It means that you get your bills paid, or you get your weekly shopping done, or you clean the house, etc... getting these things done actually can make you feel better, a feeling of accomplishment.

The main thing, though, is to do something that brings you joy. If having a dog will bring you joy, get one. If going horseback riding will bring you joy, go! If sewing or painting or writing make you happy, then do them!

I wish I knew more about your life and situation. If I did, I could say more.

Don't let life get you down. We're only here for a short time. What good comes from being down? Find things to be happy about, spend time with the people that make you happy, make you laugh. Go to the zoo and watch the animals. They're not depressed, especially the monkeys. They're a riot!

Let me share a little story with you. I work in a hospital and have been questioning whether or not it is something that I want to do for the rest of my life, seeing so many sick people really gets me down. However, I was graced by the presence of an amazing 84 year-old woman this week. The woman was ill, on a ventillator, but getting better. It was obvious that she was scared, uncomfortable and felt very alone, as her family was not in the room at the time. She wasn't my patient, I was just there to observe a procedure, but I reached down and held her hand and talked to her. Her eyes lit up, she smiled around the breathing tube. I explained what was going on, I told her we were trying to help her get strong enough to breath on her own, so that she could get well and go home. Well, later that day, when they had removed her from the ventilator and she could talk, just a little bit, I went in to see her and she lit up, she smiled, she reached her hand out to me, tried to sit up. I held her hand and she gestured me to come closer. She whispered, "You are a very special person." "So are you," I said, "so are you." Helping one person, simply by holding her hand and letting her know that someone was there and they cared about what happened to her mad her feel good and me feel great. That woman reminded me why I went into the field in the first place.

So, what's this story about? IT's about the fact that we will all be that old one day and facing death. Why do we fret so much now, when we still have years ahead of us. We have our minds, our bodies and our spirits still. USE THEM, that's what they're here for. To get us places that bring us joy, to help us express ourselves. We are lucky to have our health and our ability to communicate, travel, our independence.

Take advantage of it. Make joy in your life if there isn't any right now. PLant flowers, cook, if you like to do these things. Just enjoy what little life that we have here, if not, it's wasted.

I hope that these scattered thoughts help you at all. I've been in your shoes. Be good to yourself.

Answer 9

This may sound harsh, but a healthy diet and exercise at a gym is a good start to feeling better and feeling self worth .... Then join a club or get a new hobby ... sounds boring but works for most .... Overall remember this ... If you always Do , what you always Did.... You will always Get what you Always Got ! .... So try a total change of habit ! ... Good Luck ...

Answer 10

hey, u can restart ur life. u just do what u want, just enjoy ur life. we come in this world to enjoy, to be happy. ending a bad relationship is good, make a new relationship and move on. look it is ur life, to get happiness is depend on u. noone can make u happy if u don't want. so forget anything happened in the past. befriend with people who are like u, their likings and dislikings are just like u, and enjoy the life and most important if u want to be committed with somebody in the future make sure he should be just like u.