I'm a messy person. How can I be more organized?

Question

I'm going to get married in less than two months and I want to keep my house in perfect conditions. How can I break the terrible habit of not putting things where they belong?

Answer 1

Lots of things to think about in your situation.

PERFECT? You are aiming too high. Your house will never be perfect, because you LIVE there. Things are in a perpetual state of being used and that means you need to maintain them. And if you are planning to have children AND a perfect home, forget it. You will end up in the psych ward.

Second, it is honorable that you are trying to foresee problems in your future and your relationship with your new husband. But don't try changing to please anyone but yourself. You have to want it, and own the changes because your life is better...which DOES really affect your relationship and your new two person household but that is secondary.

Third, messy people sometimes just aren't approaching organizing from the right angle. You need to set your own standards and develop your own methods to stay on top of things. Maybe you are trying a cookie cutter method you read in a book or saw on TV, maybe you are doing things the way your mom did them. But guess what? Those things are for other people. You won't be able to adopt an entire method from someone else to fit your lifestyle. You may have some bad habits to break and you may be a little lazy sometimes about putting stuff away but you don't HAVE to conform everything about yourself to get organized.

Working WITH your own tendencies, you can develop a system that works for you.

Messy people sometimes keep things out and come and go between projects. OK so find a way to contain your stuff and keep it portable. If you read books in bed, keep your books NEAR your bed. If you do crafts, keep supplies in a bin that goes with you where you go, and maybe do them on a card table. When you are done for a while, take down the table and put your stuff in the bin.

For the problem of laying things down absent mindedly there is a way to train yourself to do it right. You learned this back in grade school when you ran down the hall...and your teacher made you go back and walk. When you find yourself doing something you shouldn't do, go back where you were, repeat the last couple steps before you made the mistake, then do the right thing. This sounds weird but what it does is start linking the correct actions together and reinforces changes in their context. You could just go back and fix the mistake but if you repeat what you were doing before you goofed, you will be practicing doing all the right things together...and you are more likely to do that thing next time.

So if your bad habit is leaving the lights on...when you notice, don't simply reach in and turn them off. Go back into the room, do an everyday task in there, and click the lights as you leave.

Some habits are fine. If you always lay things down in the same place, then this may be an indication that this is where they need to live...or somewhere nearby. For instance, if you walk in and dump the mail, keys, purse on the nearest countertop...then maybe you should install a hook there for purse, a dish for keys and pocket change, and a basket for mail...all this right on the countertop, or give all these items the closest drawer or shelf. Then they are right where they need to be with little change from you. The habit you want to change is dealing with the mail in a timely manner...junk mail straight to the shredder, recy bin or trash, things that need your attention in one pile, and things to file away in another and keep on top of those things...and keeping your purse cleaned out. Another example, if dishes or drink cans tend to accumulate on the coffee table, set a wastebasket in a hidden corner by the couch. You can put them there until you are ready to deal with it, and until then they are contained and off the coffee table. I am a soda drinker and cans used to line my dresser (which is near my bed) and the computer desk, and the side table. Now I have a plastic wastebasket near each of these. I let them go in there instead of accumulating on the surfaces, and every few days I take them all to the sink and dump them and toss them in the recy. It is like having a bus tub right there but slightly less obnoxious.

If your house is truly messy you probably have too much stuff and could use a good declutter. There are so many methods to doing that, I won't mention them all here. But try to pare down your belongings to things that suit your life now, and your soon to be married life. This will certainly be a problem if you are or will be merging households. There will be double what you used to have. You can get rid of things, a little of hers, a little of his, and keep what you both love and need for your life together.

If there is a problem getting rid of sentimental things, you may be able to repurpose things like furniture pieces. An heirloom dresser that you don't want to part with may become a new kitchen storage piece with linens inside and a microwave on top, or an entertainment center with DVD's inside and a TV on top...and that shallow drawer on top would be a perfect place for remote control batteries, remotes, matches for lighting candles, tealights and votives, as well as coasters, a couple dusting cloths, and a packet of windex wipes for getting dust of the TV screen. A family china hutch might become a storage piece in the office, instead of holding dishes, with office supplies in the drawers and decorative collectibles on the display areas. Get the idea?

Messies also tend to be creative and like variety. You can acknowledge this without letting it get out of hand. You can split off your scented toiletry collections...use one set for a week, then hide them away and bring out a new flavor.

Wardrobe is just another word for laundry so if there are a lot of clothes in circulation, you will have a lot of laundry and it is just more to be laying about. You can rotate your clothes more often than the two main season changes (S/S, F/W) by dividing them into separately functioning smaller wardrobes and storing all but one...swap them out with the seasons and when you get bored. You may think that limiting yourself to less clothing pieces stifles your creativity but when you are forced to deal with what is available your creativity actually goes UP. And think of the creativity you can have when once a year you drag out all the clothes and redo your collections, pairing items up in new ways??

Also, choose a hamper without a lid, or use laundry baskets for dirty clothes, so that your tendency to shuck out and leave things on the floor can be replaced with a simple toss into the basket. Just having that lid on means you have to walk over there, open the hamper and deposit your clothes...not a big effort but if you don't find yourself willing to do it, you don't have to.

I hope these ideas help.

Answer 2

I am a bit anal about my house. Sometimes that's good - sometimes not so good.

Some things I do that work well for me is that I too do not touch paper (mail) twice. When it comes in - I either pay it, put it where it should go or toss it.

My cupboards too have a list. I don't necessiarily enter an item on the list whenever I use it. I typically remember that I'm out of something. But, what I do have is a grocery list I made on the computer that contains the staples that I always have on hand, and things I use regularly. The best thing about my list is that I have it in aisle order of the grocery store I shop in. Talk about ease of getting groceries. My daughter and her friends are all used to my list - & as they have married or moved out on their own several have asked for copies fo my list!

When I check out at the grocery store I put items on the counter to pay for in an order of which cabinets / rooms they go to. This way my grocery task of putting things away is easier.

If I'm in one room & there is something there that goes to another room I take it with me.

Deal with things - messes, disarry etc as they happen and it is easy.

Once everything is done - closets & drawers & cabinets etc ... you will find that you want to keep it up. It's not as hard as some feel it is to aquire this trait.

Good luck & congratulations on your upcoming wedding!

Answer 3

I am not organized either and I was having a hard time maintaning a clean and neat house. Oprah had a show on about this website and it has saved my house and calmed all the CHAOS ( can't have anyone over syndrome) Not only do they give good advice but they share funny stories of how they started out and what their places used to look like

Answer 4

I am messy as well. Break your cleaning tasks down into smaller tasks. Ie, set a day of the week for specific tasks, laundry on Mondays, vaccummin carpets on Tuesdays, organize paperwork/mail on wednesdays, dusting on Thursdays, etc. If you spend 30 min to an 1 hour each night it gets easy to keep the house clean and getting/staying organized is much easier.

Answer 5

First off, your house is never going to be in "perfect" condition so just don't stress about that. Second, you just have to keep at it. When something is in your hand remind yourself to put it away now, because it will just be more work later. Try to not handle anything twice, especially paper!

Answer 6

Lists and schedules from cleaning to shopping lists and menus...i have back up of most things and when i take it out the cupboard it goes on the list to replace in the cupboard...this can be for hubby as well then you dont run out (my kids even use the list for shopping) Do your cleaning schedules for day to day,week to week and month to month. Stick to them and you should go fine you will probaly find hubby will jump in on the act too.Menus save time running back an forth to the supermarket.Congrats on your up coming marriage

Answer 7

I always clean up things first thing in the morning so that I don't have to worry about it later on.

Answer 8

First forget the word perfect and then go check out FLYLADY.net

Joining the Flylady list is like having your very own personal coach! & it's free to join her list.

Answer 9

I am both. At home I am the biggest slob you ever saw. When I work I am almost always the most organized person you ever saw. I over compensate for my life at home.

Answer 10

about.com has exactly this article in their Housekeeping section on how to get organized
http://housekeeping.about.com/od/getorganized/
there are more links on the left in red that show specifics on rooms, schedules, and daily/weekly/seasonal chores and solutions
http://housekeeping.about.com/od/cleaningschedules/
Best of all, are the 15 minute clean-up solutions for every room
http://housekeeping.about.com/od/15minutecleanups/
links are there for stain removal too at about.com

Answer 11

check out Flylady.com, stick to the routines, it may seem like a lot of work, but her program will make your life SOOOOOOOOO much easier! Good luck, your not alone!