How do I stop feeling like my life is a pointless waste of time?

Question

Earlier this year I left my job after 7 years for something I liked better. When I left my job I was unaware that I didn't really have the job I left for. A week later my husband was fired from his job. His was denied unemployment. Then because I have problems with anxiety and depression our mobile home was repossessed. Currently, I am 50 years old, living with my brother and his family, and still unemployed. My husband is living in an old house on the property with no running water. It just seems to me that no matter what I have tried to do in life I constantly fail. I know there are solutions to every problem but why do I even want to get up for more of the same.

Answer 1

Keep trying and trying until u get there. U know that saying, "when you fall down seven times, you get up eight times'"? U will get there. U just have to have perseverance.
Everyone's been there in your shoes.

Answer 2

That's pretty normal. I know it doesn't feel normal, but 18 years old is a hard age. Many people would say that their early or late teens were their hardest years. That's legitimate. People don't really find their true place in the world until they're on their feet. Failing senior year isn't a life ending experience, just do your best. Yes, friends use drugs in high school, you're probably not going to keep those friends when you graduate. Also very normal. You feel like a stranger in your own home because you want to "leave the nest". Normal. Your brothers are your brothers, I hate my sister sometimes too. That's what siblings do. We're always there for each other to yell at. You do have skills and talents, you're just choosing to forget them right now. If you took a moment to remember what you like doing, I'm sure some skills will come back to you. About your parents, just because they don't come out and ask you why you're depressed doesn't mean they aren't aware of it. Everyone is a disappointment to their parents. Thats life. They were a disappointment to their parents. We get over it. Confidence comes with age, especially experience. Sometimes having a girlfriend adds much more drama. Trust that golden hint of advice. Your dog is a dog, I'm sure it loves you. You're worth it, otherwise I wouldn't have taken my time to write this message. You're alive because someone purposefully chose to bring you onto this planet and has raised you for 18 years out of love and responsibility. You deserve it, that's why you're living it. Now start looking at the good things you actually have.

Answer 3

The urge to just throw up your hands and give up is powerful and difficult to overcome. I know this from my own experiences. Once you fall into that hole, it's a hard crawl to claw your way back out. Think about this: Let's say you were taking a walk out in the country just thinking about things and you stepped on an old well that was covered with leaves and rotten boards and you fell in. You get hurt but you can still move OK. You take some time to think about your situation. What would you really decide to do? Would you just give up and lay there? Maybe somebody would find you, maybe not. Maybe you would wait until hunger or thirst drove you to try and find a way up. Do you think you could stand the agony of really dying of hunger or thirst? Right now, just stop and really ponder this. What you have described in your question is not much different because the question is, do I believe in my will to survive. To survive, only you have the control over that. So, it's necessary that you have to take control over your life as well and never leave your survival up to anything or anyone else.
Up to now, you've left your survival up to anyone but you. You left your job up to chance by not making sure you had the new job before leaving the old one. Your home was repossessed due to depression and anxiety, not your fault! Take control and you can put everything in place and make it stay there.

Answer 4

That sounds really rough, and I'm sorry that you've had to go through all of that. It's really wonderful though that your brother and his family are allowing you to stay there. The reason that you should try to solve the problem is because it's not impossible to solve.

My genuine opinion is that in some way, you are lucky to be in a situation where you can search for happiness beyond what most people find. Lots of people try to find happiness through money, and when they succeed in acquiring a lot of money, they realize that they're still not happy. I think that if you can think hard on what happiness is and find it without needing some of the material luxuries that other people have, your happiness will be richer and more fulfilling than that of most people who have lots of possessions.

I look with admiration upon the monks in monestaries around the world who have practically nothing but their robes and alms bowls, who have abandoned wordly pleasures for the sake of a higher internal happiness. People who have so little can be so happy, and there's no real difference between them and anybody else except in the way that they view the world. They don't think that they need anything, so they're not unhappy when they have nothing. Because you're not holding onto as many possessions as most people, I think that you have a greater chance than most people of finding a more genuine kind of bliss that is internal rather than external.

You might also see a therapist and talk to that person about your anxiety and depression, and that may help.

Answer 5

You have hit one of those low spots we all have upon occasion. What you do about it and how you view it can make all the difference.
I know you may be aware of this but most all companies will allow you to set a start date for you to work knowing you already are working. The fact you are working at the time you are looking reflects your dependability and honesty. So they most generally have no problem with waiting until you have given notice at the other job. generally about a week.
Never quit a job unless you have a firm hire date somewhere else.

Now the problem you have is both are not working. Okay why can you both not get a temp job while you look for something better.
Nothing wrong with working at wall-mart or any place else just to keep going. With both working that way you should be okay.

Life is hard. We all know that. But we need to look at it as a challenge not impossible. Work with your husband on this. Ask your brother for advice. Ask anyone you know if they have any ideas.

Why was your husband fired? Wasn't he doing the job or was it a boss thing?

There is help from social services but you have to be in pretty desperate shape. Sounds like you may qualify. They could help with finding another job also.

Don’t give up. It will get better as long as you believe in yourself and not give up. Look for as many ways as you can to turn this around. It is difficult and you must put yourself out there but if you do you will look back at his and feel proud of yourself for carrying on. You can do it. A lot of people have.

Answer 6

Be vigilant. Be ever watchful for jobs, and if you have to, lower your standards a little. Since you have experience already, you might look in the field you just left, at least in the meantime. Use internet postings if you can, like Monster. For the downtime, when you find yourself without anything to do, try finding an outlet like painting. Other art forms can be just as helpful, and can give you a sense of self worth and satisfaction. Whatever you do, be sure to break up your day with various activities. Maybe volunteer somewhere, or start reading more. Don't let your days blur together. The most important thing is that you don't lose hope. We all go through parts of life where everything seems hopeless, but eventually we get through it, especially when our family is there to help us.

Answer 7

meditate on what mistakes you are constantly making. What do you need to learn from to make a change and move on? There's something out there for you, visualize positive energy around you. Don't dwell on the negative it will consume you. Believe and relive all the good and positive things you have done in the past and make positive promises you know you can keep in the future. If you are not working, try vounteering. Maybe at a shelter where people have a harder life than you because they have no cool family to take them in. You never know, by giving back you could get something in return.

Answer 8

First things first...your mobile home was not repossessed because you have anxiety and depression. You did not pay your notes. It seems that you have an answer for everything. And an exuse also. There are plenty of jobs out there to be had. You all just need to get off of your behinds, stop feeling sorry for yourself and go get one.

Answer 9

Your problems with success are in the fact that when you start making progress, you let other people take your foundation out from under you. Those people pulling the foundation out from under you are losers who cannot achieve any success on their own either.

I was in your situation for a long time and then I finally decided to put my family ahead of the rest of the world and now I at least FEEL better.

Just don't help anyone until you have reached a goal that is secure.

Answer 10

This may sound strange but think of your life as if you were going up a down escalator. If you quit trying you lose ground but if you continue to try you will sooner or later make it to the top. The secret is never give up you can only make decisions based on the information that you have to work with at the time the decision was made

Answer 11

I would recommend a couple of things. If you don't have a church home, find one. Just get up in the morning and go to one. God will comfort you, and so will the love of other believers. Then, find a counselor. Depression really needs to be dealt with by getting counseling and probably some medication. The medication will probably only be a temporary thing, but let the doctor guide you on that. I wish you the best! I know how you feel.