would he understand?

Question

i have a self destructive past...should i tell my boyfriend?

i have a self destructive past ...(cutting)...should i tell my boyfriend? i quit just before i started going out with him..we have been going out for about a month and a half

Answer 1

don't mean to be blunt here but are you givning yourself a reason to cut again?

you need to tell him if you are willing to take his reaction. you are fresh in a relationship and probably do not know him well enough to know if he would be understanding or not. Only tell him when you are comfortable and trust him, and make sure it is for the right reasons not to self sabotage.

It would do you great benefit to start talking to someone if you haven't already, chances are you have cut yourself for reasons you don't want to reveal to yourself, and want to hide from it. Rejection of others is a great catylist to start cutting again, because you have rejected yourself and blamed yourself for some reason and cutting is a way to perhaps release the pain... or to feel and deal with it. But it is only superficial. In order to stop cutting you need to get down to the heart of the matter, and that is like peeling back the layers of an onion. The road you are embarking on is one of healing and I admire you for that, but you have a long way to go... and it is hard to go it alone.
Do not make light of it with the ones you love, and if you feel you need to be open and honest right away, prepare yourself for a reaction you may not expect... but a negative reaction does not mean or say anything about you. Please know that people are responsible for thier own actions and reactions, and it may be something that makes someone uncomfortable, and it may seem like you are held in judgement, but truthfully they just don't know how to react.
Begin to love yourself by getting the help you need and deserve. If you are unsure of telling him right now as your question suggests, perhaps now isn't the right time.

Please know that I am not making any sort of judgment of you, and I do realize that some people, there are actually a great number of people who cut themselves because they think it is "cool, or fun" or what have you... I have not come across this , I have only talked to people who cut themselves because of deep emotional need from a buried tramatic past.
I could be wrong, but cutting from what I understand can become addictive... either way, this should be addressed with a professional who can help and get to the heart of the matter.

Answer 2

If it's something that's going to affect your relationship with him, then, yes, you should tell him. I would wait until I saw that the two of you had something, then by all means you should tell him. If there is really nothing there, then there's no use. In the meantime, try to stop being self-destructive, and get some help if you need to. Good Luck!

Answer 3

Are you still prone to those episodes? How long have you been together? I would not tell him until things get really serious unless you may fall back into the same routine sometime.

Answer 4

if he is someone you will have in your life for a long time then yes. He should know the good, and the bad.

Answer 5

yes

Answer 6

Yes, you should tell him..