What coping skills are you using to deal with your desire for a baby? What are reasons your spouse has given you for not being ready?
2006-11-11 09:39:02 · 6 answers · asked by Cheyne 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Going through this right now, and it's so hard! I've been wanting kids for years, my husband and I got married a year and a half ago and I want to start trying! But he says we're not "ready" yet. I went into the marriage telling him that this was not an issue I was willing to compromises on, I will be having kids. He was ok with that, saying he wants kids too, just not yet! What's been making it especially difficult is that 11 of my friends and family members have had babies THIS YEAR! It is so hard being around them, as I am happy for them but completely jealous of them too.
I'd love some advice on this too, how do I get my husband to agree that we are "ready" (whatever that means anyway)?? We have a house, jobs, all that good stuff, what else is there?
2006-11-11 10:42:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I doubt this is considered a coping skill by any means, but my husband and I are actually divorcing and this is one of the main reasons why. I have always wanted kids, he has 2 from a previous marriage and seems to have no interest in having more. His first wife has been a real biatch to us and kept his kids from him for the past 7 years. I think he's afraid of going through that pain again. It kills me he thinks I would do something like that to him.
Dr. Phil says it takes 2 yesses or one no, so there's my answer. I'm out of here. You can't force someone to become a parent, and if you do, you'll regret it. Good luck, hopefully in time he'll be ready.
2006-11-11 09:47:02 · answer #2 · answered by theAfternooner 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have the desire to have a baby, hubby has the desire but not yet. He says we owe it to the future of our child/children to be able to give them all they need. His biggest fear is they may have to go without and he doesn't want that. So together we made a plan for 7 months from now. We budgeted a plan for bills/creditors finding a home of our own etc. I am ok with this idea. In the mean time we practice..lol
2006-11-11 10:23:13 · answer #3 · answered by odessa2469 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st he brings up: $$$, savings, bills, I want this 1st, ETC! Then I tell him that having a baby is always on my mind, etc. I make plans on my own for whenever it does happen: subscribing to baby, etc magazines and leaving them out in the open, buying baby clothes and toys and doing the same, bringing over a friend or neighbor who just had a baby, watching alot of T.V. about parenting, etc. I could go on and on. Just use a devious mind.
2006-11-11 09:45:22 · answer #4 · answered by rhonda_seiler 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry my husband and i think if it happens it happens if it dont it dont as long as we have each other
2006-11-11 09:44:26 · answer #5 · answered by mustang_rws 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no idea.
2006-11-11 09:44:25 · answer #6 · answered by dotab 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋