Am moving out of Memphis to Cal. Don't want to leave my son.?

Question

I want to start fresh at another state. but I will miss my son. What should I do? Am wanting to start school also. It is boring here in Memphis. I've live here for 22 yrs.

Answer 1

You didn't mention how old your son is, there is a big difference between leaving a 19 year old and a 29 year old. Here is my advice - Some people look for happiness, some people create it. If you truly want a new start bad enough that you consider moving, try to make changes in your life. Start by making friends in the area, join a gym, a book club, start a bunco group, etc. I have a friend in the Memphis running goup, she has made a lot of friends. If you can't find a group for your particular hobbies, start one. Something else to consider - are you exercising on a regular basis? This could make you feel better about yourself. I can't believe you think Memphis is boring. Spend some time on Beale St. I can go down there without spending a dime and have a good time. Stroll through The Peabody Mall, people watch, watch street performers, etc. Even The National Civil Rights Museum, Memphis Botanic Gardens, Mud Island, Memphis Zoo, Pink Palace, Brooks Museum, and Lichterman Nature Center have free days/times. Keep yourself busy, and try new things to bring your spirits up. If this doesn't work for you, then consider a move, but only after having a serious talk with your son.

Answer 2

Well, you don't have to move all the way to california in order to start fresh somewhere else. You could move to another town in Tenn, or to a neighboring state. In that way you are still near your son. Also, as others said, it depends too on how old he is ... if he is under 20, esp under 17, you may want to hold off on that for a few years. Kids really need their parents.

If he is an adult, see to it that you have frequent communication with him via phone/web and can visit each other twice a year at least.

If the reason you are thinking of moving to california is a job offer, weigh all the pros and cons. If it is a love interest, especially one you have met online, make sure it's a good and solid match and relationship before taking that kind of a step. That means spend a lot of time together BEFORE making such a move.

If you just think california is a cool place, do some research on places nearer Memphis, there are probably a lot of neat places to consider starting fresh at.

I wish you all the best. The fresh start can be great ... but you might also want to do counseling beforehand, because if you have issues and problems, they will follow you to where ever you go.

Also, if your son is an adult, you might invite him to accompany you or consider moving to where ever you move to. He may choose not to, but will appreciate your thinking of him.

Answer 3

The question is here, is that are you goign to place your wants over your childs needs? You WANT a new life, but your child NEEDS a parent.

Answer 4

Nothing is more important then your son.