What should I do?Am confused...serious answers only pls…read all?

Question

I told my close female friend how I felt about her and she said that she doesn't want a relationship,the main reason being that she is scared of
losing the friendship\risking it.

Wud she ever change her mind??Or should I just accept this.

Why wudn't a potential relationship work???

Is the difference that big???Especially as we're practically a couple already-minus the physical side.

I've not spoken to her for 6 days now,she's txt my mate asking if he knows what's up with me.

Does this mean she's missing me?Will she txt again asking how I am?Why won't she ask me?

We are attracted to each other-we once contemplated a 1 night stand,but decided not to.

When she said 'IT WUDN'T FEEL RIGHT' does this mean anything?Should she get in touch with me if she really feels something for me?Is a true friend?

Answer 1

This is what she is affraid of. You are her best friend and she can't even talk to you because you haven't talked to her in almost a week. You just proved her point for her.My husband is my best friend. And back when he was just my best friend he told me that he thought we should try going out. We aready were going everywere together anyway. I turned him down also for the same reason I was afraid I would lose my best friend. Do you know what changed my mind. He looked at me and said o.k. can't blame me for trying. Now come out side and help me do the tune up on my car. By doing that by letting me see that he wasn't going to start acting wierd towards me. By just continuing to be himself around me. I realized that their wasn't anything to be scared of because my best friend would be there in this relationship with me.

Answer 2

The mind of a woman is a complex thing and the route to their feelings is even more so. I think you should be glad you have a friendship with this girl and not push things. If it's meant to happen it will happen. I think that as she has text someone about you she does care for you but also why the hell aren't you txting her? Just because you have revealed your feelings and been told that maybe it isn't the right time why should things change between you both. I think she is a true friend a possible soul mate just give it time, don't push and enjoy life!

Answer 3

i think that to make the relationship work, you both have to come to some kind of agree-ance (made up word) that the relationship would work and that if something should happen, you will remain friends.

i think that she's afraid to establish a relationship like that because if something does happen, she wont have you as a friend in the end. obviously she values your friendship now and doesnt want to risk losing it.

youre going to have to talk to her about being what friends are to each other at the same time (if in the relationship) being faithful to one another. if the friendship is that strong enough then i dont see why having a failed relationship would hurt it. it would only hurt knowing that it couldnt work-at least you tried- but at least you know you two are better off as very good friends.

dont have people delivering messages back and forth for the 2 of you... just talk about it face to face and be comfortable about talking about it... your friends afterall... you should be able to talk about anything!

you'll never know what will happen until you do something about it. dont waste your time wondering about the "what ifs".

goodluck. best wishes

Answer 4

sounds like she really only wants to be your friend and she was being perfectly honest with you. now since you haven't talked for a few days she's probably worried she lost you all together. go back to things the way they were and if this really was meant to be an "in-love" relationship it will happen when you're
BOTH ready and comfortable. if you really love her, you'll respect that she IS a true friend and didn't want to hurt you by not being honest. if you want to be with her so much you can't stand to be "just a regular friend," let her know and don't leave her guessing and feeling as insecure as you feel now. honesty is always best, especially when you've had a good friendship in the past.

Answer 5

Ok, if my best friend asked me out and I basically said no, and then he stopped talking to me, I would be slightly confused. She didn't say she didn't want to be friends with you right? If you just ran away from the friendship, that's exactly what she was afraid of happening after a relationship. She probably wishes as much as you do things could just go back to the way they were. And yes, girls are infamous for changing their minds, so be patient and you never know what you may find. Hope this helps.

Answer 6

Sorry friend - I think if youve been that close for that long as friends and shes turned you down its because she doesnt feel the same way - She obviosly cares for you as a friend because she's not taking you up on your offer for the wrong reasons, (loniliness, desperation or whatever)
I think at this stage you have to think about distancing yourself from her - you have such strong feelings that arent going to be returned - its bad enough having your heart broken - dont break your own. Put some distance between you for two reasons -
1) At this stage if there is a move to be made it has to come from her , youve made it very clear what you want.
2) If this isnt going to happen with her - spending time so closely with someone you feel that way about is painfull and you wont be moving forward in your life
Sorry friend id love to think that things would work out for you, love can be such a messy business!

Answer 7

I think that you should contiue and a gentle way to show her how youmfeel. first lifees a risk, but on the other hand you are 3 quarts of the way there she your best friend and your her best the foundation as already be laid, she will comme to realize with your absents her true feeling for without risk life isn't worth it. she frighten another approach may be to find out what happen in her past relation, their a trust issue, also distance does make the heart worry about those we are even used to, show her you on another level that of best friend and romatic partner. Take the leap it's going to alright, it sounds as she cares, don't play any games with her remember their is a trust coming from somewhere inside this women. I wish you luck.

Answer 8

Its called 'letting you down gently' mate. Forget it, she doesn't want to know. She obviously still wants to be your friend though so don't let that go. The 'wouldn't feel right' thing simply means that she's just not attracted to you in that way. Just move on, you'll get over it.

Answer 9

There is a big difference between being your friend and being your lover. Your friend obviously wants to be just that, your friend. If you value your friendship don't ask any more of her 'cos you risking losing her friendship.

Answer 10

Give her a call. Talking is so important. Take it one day @ a time and if the relationship turns physical so be it, if not find a girlfriend who is in sink with your needs and wants. It's a two way street.