i would like some advice on what to do about a sad Christmas.?

Question

hi, i'm a recently remarried mother of 3. all was as it should be until after a somewhat minor surgery i was dismissed from my job.my husband and i fought and i was able to collect unemployment however we suffered a serios financial loss. despite my efforts i have come up empty in my job search. now we find ourselves comming up empty handed. we are in danger of having electricity turned off, water, phone and everthing. my husband works so hard every day and i do what i can odd jobs and so on but i'm affraid that my girls will have no christmas this year. does anyone have an advice or know of anywhere we can find help? i feel almost unfit and i'm very scared that my mistakes will ruin my girls belief in Santa!

Answer 1

Contact your local United Way, or a Christian Ministry....Toys for Tots is a great one to get in touch with, sponsored by the Marine Corps. I personally help support these myself, for people just like yourself. Let friends, and family know(swallow your pride)! I am thinking right now that your girls are going to have their best Christmas ever. Wait and see!

Answer 2

There are a lot of programs that help - but it takes some effort to find them. Try these and there are probably other programs in your area.

Check with your local churches and the local Christmas Mother program. I live in the Richmond, VA area and for years have seen local churches help families. You do not have to be a member of the church or attend any of the churches.

Many electric companies have a program to help people pay their utiltiy bill. They may have the program administered by the local Social Services agency. Start by contacting your utility company.

Many localities have an "association of churches" that you should try contacting, they may be able to direct you to some help.

Check with your local food bank.

And while this may seem "odd" to include as a suggestion, consider asking some of these org if you and your family can help distribute items. Back in 1972, because of personal problems I would get suicidal. I really hated any holiday. For me, a way out of it was to offer a little help to others. Then in 1983 after a few months of married life, my wife and I delivered food from a church to people (neither the people receiving the food or my wife were members of the church). My wife and I think we got more out of the experience than the people receiving the food.

Also contact the Marine's Toys for Tots - you might be able to get some toys for the kids.

Don't give up. And don't feel bad about asking for help. At some time, most of us need a hand - which we repay when things get better.

Answer 3

Contact a local church, many have angel trees. Or, some will even sponsor a whole family. My parents did that for a few years after we were grown -- got the santa lists and shopped for a family in a rough time. It is rewarding on both ends....helps you and blesses those able to give. Call toys for tots, etc. I think most counties/cities also have toy collections of some sort.

I guess if I were you I would work retail somewhere just for the money -- and to keep your utilities on. It may not be your forever plans, and may not use your training, but I don't feel I am above anything when it comes to taking care of my kids.

Try to work when you hubby is home, at least for now, so that you don't have to pay childcare.

Good luck.

Answer 4

Hello, I am so sorry to hear about all of your loss and trouble. I wonder if there is a church in your area where you can turn for some assistance? Many churches have programs to help families that have fallen on hard times, especially during the holidays. It doesn't matter if you are not of that faith: usually these programs are in the spirit of helping people in need. I know it might be hard to ask, but you could go and ask to speak with the pastor/priest privately, share your situation briefly and honestly, and see what might be available. You didn't mention the ages of your children. If they are very tiny it could be hard to explain to them, but if you think they are old enough to understand, the truth might be the best. You can say to them that this year the family doesn't have a lot of extra money, but that you and your husband are working hard to get ahead, and that you are going to have a modest Christmas this year and that Santa knows that. You can say that everyone in the family is going to make each other something: a special drawing or simple craft. I know that it is very hard to compete with all the toys and commercialism of Christmas, but in a strange way, you might find that it is very freeing to say that this year your family is going to do something different. I will pray for you and your family and wish you the very best.

Answer 5

Well you are not to blame for this you had to have a minor surgery and that is just a part of the way life goes, so the first step in helping is to stop blaming yourself for what is going on. I was there where you were a few months ago, I am a single mom with three kids, and I had to have a major surgery which yes I could of held off but was in so much pain that I chose to have it done. First thing you want to do is to call all of your utility company;s and ask them for an extension on the bill, explain to them your situation and ask to make payment arraingements some company's are willing to let you do this, do not let them tell you that you have to pay a certain amount because that is not true just let them know how much you can afford a month until you get back on your feet. Also I do not know how old your girls are, but it si against the law (at least in Calif.) to shut off any utility's if there is a child under the age of 6 in the house, or if there is a medical condition taht requires electricity etc. Go to your local website for your utility company and look up there regulations, they have to post them. Second thing you can do is to find a local church, they sometimes have a list of resources that will help you pay your utilitys, and will help provide you with food, Look for a local Salvation Army in your area they also provide help with utility's and food as well. They also have a program for kids so that if you need toys for x-mas they will help with that as well. It is important to ask as many questions as you can with all of these places. I know that St. Rose out here helps with food twice a week, they do help pay some utility's and rent. It is a matter of finding the right place to go. They also have a x-mas program that is for the kids as well. I know it is hard but swallow your pride and let them help you. I had to swallow mine and it workded out for me, they paid my electric bill and everything, fresh food during the week. It is what needs to be done until you can get yourself together. I wish you the best of luck. And please feel free to let me know if I have helped in any way, or if you need more information. I can also suggest the Knights of Columbus group, they do charity work as well and may be able to help you and your family out as well.

Answer 6

try the salvation army. you can get emergency financial help with electricity and food and probably other utilities as well (they will only do it once) also you can get xmas gifts thru them for your kids. at the least they can direct you to anyone else that can help as well. good luck, keep your chin up and don't be to proud to work at a mcdonalds they pay a decent wage. much more than minimum. $15.00 can buy 3 kids each 5 fun things from the dollar tree and im sure you can find some new or looks like new items from the thrift stores.

Answer 7

There are many places who help out families in need so that children won't have to go out on Christmas. You will have to fill out an application and are put on a list. Depending on the area you live in sometimes the list fills up fast. They do try their best to get something for everyone.

I don't know where you live so it is hard to say. Where I live the Salvation Army and Community Action Program helps out families. The Community Action Program can also help you out with paying your electricity and water bills too.

Answer 8

Something simmilar happend to my family when I was a child. I was in and out of the hospital, my mother wasnt the best in the world... and my dad had a very hard time finding a job. christmas wasn't very good that year for my sister and I. We didnt blame our parents in the least though. We didnt even wonder why our presents were wrapped in news paper instead of wrapping paper. My advice is talk to your pastor at your church... they may be able to help you. (( My parents didnt go to church so that wasn't an option for them )). You can also talk to the local rescue mission.
Sometimes the only way to learn how to be full, is to expirence empty.

Answer 9

Call your local Salvation Army. They'll be able to either help financially or at least put you in touch with people who can. Depending on how much your husband makes, you could try your county's social services. In my area, you have to make less than $21,000/yr. to qualify for any help from social services. Also, contact the company you get your electricity from and find out if they have a fund for people who are in dire straits financially, as you are.

Answer 10

Call the welfare office (you should be getting food stamps anyway) Call the Catholic churches, they help everyone not just chatholics. Salvation Army might help, if not they can probably tell you who to contact. 6 years ago the people in my office were given kids wish lists. The kid I got was in a shelter for battered women. They had to leave their home in a hurry & had almost nothing. I got everything on the list then called to find out the Mom's clothing size. I bought her 5 outfits & shoes. We never met but I felt good knowing I helped