My friend Jake has a crush on this guy our french class, I've been looking him over and, he's definitley gay, and hot. I keep telling him that they should go out and they would be so cute together and Jake just laughs but never really does anything about it, one day I brought Vince to lunch with me so they could meet, and they got off great, I was watching them from the next table and there was so much chemistry, but Jake didn't ask him out, the bell rang and he said "See ya" and left, I caught up with him and asked him why he didn't do it, he just looked down and said "I envy you" "Me? Why?" "You don't care what others think of you, your the ******* vice president in a gay rights group, and your straight" "Well don't rub my face in it" then he looked right at me and said "But I do, and it's impossible to have a gay relationship as a teen" Then he left, is this true? It's not possible for gays to date in highschool for fear of being harrassed? Or is that different in some places?
2006-11-11 04:05:41 · 17 answers · asked by StarGirl 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I'm not trying to make them date, in fact I've given up because he makes a sad but true argument, I just set my friends up, if it works out it works out, if not then tough luck I tried my best.
2006-11-11 04:14:02 · update #1
yes its possible, especially if you're an older teen.
2006-11-11 04:09:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not impossible to have a gay relationship as a teen, but it is very difficult. Some people still have problems with gay people, and teens tend to be very hard on each other for any differences. I commend you for your outgoing personality, and your ability to not care about what other people think, but it is best to leave Jake alone and let him start a relationship when or if he feels comfortable with it. Your best bet is to continue to be a good friend to him and keep up your work in the gay rights group. And please remind Jake that *everything* is easier in college.
2006-11-11 04:10:57 · answer #2 · answered by Beth B 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had boyfriends at school, but it was an all-boys school, and in the UK, so maybe it was a different situation. I haven't got any experience of what it's like in other schools.
I was out from about the age of 12, and always open about it, and I did get some bullying and stuff but nothing too serious (it was a very good school, though, with a strong anti-bullying policy, and the headmaster was very positive about equal rights).
I think in some ways being very open has worked for me, and boys who tried to be more secretive about their sexuality got picked on more. Or maybe I was just lucky.
You have to let your friend make his own decisions, though, even if you don't fully agree with his reasons.
2006-11-11 05:27:57 · answer #3 · answered by JBoy Wonder 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is very possible to have a gay relationship in high school. And harassment shouldn't matter to them....They should have pride. And relationships take a while so don't expect them to get together the same day you introduce them. Just sit back and watch what happens and maybe they might turn out to be best friends or boyfriends.
2006-11-11 05:21:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
In most part of non-western, non-heterosexualised world (including India), boys often have sex with each other without having to be labelled 'gay' (actually there is no such thing as 'homosexual' or 'heterosexual' in non westernised societies).
It is just a part of growing up, it is not encouraged, and in fact if caught boys are punished for it, but since there is no stigma of being 'gay' attached to it, most boys participate in it.
2006-11-17 16:29:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My cousin is a very popular gay guy at his high school and has had a couple boyfriends publicly -- in CA it seems to be pretty much okay with most people and his parents are fine with it - but some places and kids are scared of what people may say or do to them -- their family may not know or if they find out it would not be accepted...
2006-11-11 04:10:20 · answer #6 · answered by doubt133 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is possible but think of all the torment they will go through. I'm a gay male as well and things like that one has to do on his own terms and when he/she wants to.
try to set them up outside of school. in a neutral area where they both can be comfortable. Mayb e then they can exchange greetings in a more private and not embarrising way.
2006-11-11 04:10:24 · answer #7 · answered by digitaldancer22 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Anythign is possible in life but at one time or another it might appear to be difficult due to one or more seemingly unscalable obstacles. And when one is young and inexperienced in the ways of life, it seems even harder to do some thingsfor fear of parents and others not approving.
2006-11-16 09:50:20 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not as frowned on as it used to be; as long as they abide by the same rules as the other students (i.e., no macking in the hallways) then they shouldn't have much to worry about. I've known other teenagers who are gay and their peers knew it. I think it depends more on how the kids' parents take it rather than classmates.
2006-11-11 04:11:58 · answer #9 · answered by Scarlett_156 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can understand his point. Just because he is putting himself out there socially does not mean that he needs to put his relationships out front for all to see.
Heck, I am straight and I don't like that kind of scrutiny myself with my relationships.
Let him make his own decisions, he is the only one that truly knows what is best for him.
2006-11-11 04:10:19 · answer #10 · answered by Barbara 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've got to walk a thin line between helping and interfering here. You can be too pushy and ruin your relationship with them both
2006-11-11 04:09:51 · answer #11 · answered by rchlbsxy2 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋