i realize that everyone is self-centered to a point, but i have a friend who is very much all about herself. she has pissed off all of her friends.. ALL of them, since getting a boyfriend who is a total wet blanket. she started dating him 4 months ago, and all of her friends have told her how much she has changed, but she just hears that she is pushing her friends away, but she still just goes futher into her new boyfriends shadow, and we have no hope of getting her to see reality.
her boyfriend is "different", shall we say from all of us, we do things (partying) that he doesn't see any need for, in his life, which i completely respect.
however, i am having a hard time respecting my friends choices. its like they are from two different worlds but she doesn't see how that pushes us out. is there any hope? general rules give her a couple months to get over this crap-- its been FOUR!
if the changes are permanent than i think i am going to eventually lose my "best friend".advice?
2006-11-11 03:05:21 · 13 answers · asked by don't be rude. 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
thanx... makes sense what some of you are saying.
1. i am married, so i have found what she is trying to find, but....
2. i have never lost friends or pushed friends away, my husbands and my life blended together, we didn't push people out and stomp on them when we got together.
3. i do realize that everyones reality and perceptions are different.
2006-11-11 03:23:43 · update #1
4. i have and her other friends have all talked to her..... NO CHANGES.
i am coming to the point where i am just going to give up, but i feel sorry that when she pulls her head out of his **** she will have nobody.... its a sad day.
2006-11-11 03:25:43 · update #2
Yeah, well that's life with some so called friends. As soon as a guy comes into the picture, they're gone. She'll be back when she's without a boyfriend. I'd made a new best friend if I were you and when your "friend" asks why you guys don't hang out together, tell her the truth. You can't be self-centered and expect people to hand around waiting for you and your problems. Godloveya.
2006-11-11 03:10:09 · answer #1 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her. If you know what will come of her pushing her friends away then help her out a little by letting her know what she needs to do. She will end up w/-out this guy & no friends when she decides that this guy isnt the best for her. Talk to her. Tell her "I love you to death cuz youre my friend & thats why i cant sit here & let you do this to yourself. Youre pushing everyone out of your life that cares about you. Youve changed & its not good. Getting a b/f doesnt mean that you have to push out everyone else in your life. I care about you & want you happy but dont forget about all the people that were there for you before you had a boyfriend." I hope that helped. Good luck!
2006-11-11 06:18:49 · answer #2 · answered by Abby 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Opposites attract! She is just trying to be a girlfriend.
You should explain to her that you miss her and her friendship, spending time and doing girly things are a necessity to life. She has to decide how to balance out your friendship and her relationship. She is choosing him but if you don't talk to her and tell her how she is pushing you and her other friends away she won't know. Typical of women tho - we seem to alienate everyone when we get a new man in our lives - I haven't a clue why some of us do this. It only causes regret later on, because friends are for life men come n men go!!
2006-11-11 03:12:29 · answer #3 · answered by HereweGO 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
A friend got involved with a real idiot, and she spends all her time with him. Worse of all, she hasn't even met him yet, and everyone thinks he's a scam artist or some guy that is playing with her mind. He feeds her attention needs, and her REAL friends are getting the cold shoulder.
2015-02-21 03:22:24 · answer #4 · answered by Rachel L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're simply angry that she's chosen her boyfriend over you.
It happens. You have to understand that she's found a relationship that she enjoys and wants to pursue. People are individuals and don't have to see the truth or the light or "reality" as you see it.
If you're old enough to know what's right, then give her that same credit. Mayhaps you should find your own relationship.
2006-11-11 03:18:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The more you talk to her about it, the farther she will dig in. It's really a shame that some people will turn on their friends when there is a guy involved. You can either hang in there with her, or just let things take their course. When she breaks up with him, she will be back.
2006-11-11 03:21:06 · answer #6 · answered by doglady 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
talk to her like tell her how you feel about it, friendships will always be changing throughout life, if she doesn't listen you don't have to put up with her, even thought it's really tough ending long friendships you'll be making new ones in the future so look forward to those
2006-11-11 03:19:33 · answer #7 · answered by meloy 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should not feel that way, unless the boyfriend forbids her to spend time with you, her friends. What about being the first one to reach out to our friend and her boyfriend? I think they would appreciate it a lot if you are happy for them.
2006-11-11 03:20:24 · answer #8 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I know its hard for u to understand but dont u think she is entitled to find happiness for herself regardless what you think of her choice of blokes.. You know someday the tables could be reversed and then what.. Will u remember then what your said in the past..
2006-11-11 03:14:11 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she's found a good guy. Can you accept that if it's true?
2006-11-11 03:10:20 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋