who here knows good "yo mama" jokes?

Answer 1

you ever hear the pharcyde song yo mama?


Yo man, you gotta be... you know
You gotta be on to die, man, what's up with that?
Yo bro-shot
Yeah, word up bro-shot
Uh, we need some brothers to be, uh, like droppin knowledge
and writin good stuff
Ay man, why don't you quit talkin all the stuff and do something about it?
You know what I'm sayin?
Oh, you talking about.. kick some, uh, knowledge...
Yeah, well you do that like right now
... and some wisdom for the people
What's up with that?
OK, I got it

(brothers and sisters)

Verse One: Booty Brown

Ya mom is so fat (how fat is she?)
Ya mama is so big and fat that she can get busy
with twenty-two burritos, but times are rough
I seen her in the back of Taco Bell with handcuffs
The sad fact (what?) ya mama smokes crack (what?)
She got a burning yearning and there's no turning back
Her knuckles drag down to the ground when she walk
Spit comes out that ***** mouth when she talk

Refrain:

Naked on a mountain top, tootin on a flizoot
Ridin on a horse drinking whisky out a bizoot
She's got the wings and teeth of an african bat
Her middle name is Mudbone and on top of all that:

Ya mama got a glass eye with the fish in it (3X)
Ya mama, ya mama, ya mama

Verse Two: Slim Kid Tre

Ya mama look like she's been in the dryer with some rocks
With the big bust nose sucking dirt out of socks
Held up the ice cream truck with a slingshot
She grabbed a bag of Cheese Corn and a soda pop
Ya mama root'n'toot and stole my loot and my suit
She may have the muscles, but no, she's not cute
She's not pretty, oh what a pity, got the glass titty
Filled up with Kool-aid, just for the kiddies

Refrain:

On a cliff butt naked, tootin on a flute
Ridin on a horse drinkin whisky out a boot
She's got the teeth and the wings of an African bat
Her middle name is Mudbone and on top of all that

Ya mama got the wooden legs with real feet (3X)
Ya mama, ya mama, ya mama

Verse Three: Fat Lip

Watch out, I'm thinkin about your mother to a funky beat
I went to your house, and she licked me on the cheek
I said excuse me lady, but I remember seeing you at the Palladium
way back in September
Cause you was beatboxin for Lou Rawls
In some bright red boxer drawers
You said ya moms was pretty and young
But she's old as dirt and got hair on her tongue

Refrain:

Ya moms, ya moms, she uses Brut
And I saw her ridin a horsey drinking whisky out a boot
She's got the wings and teeth of an african bat
Her middle name is Mudbone, and on top of all that

Ya mama's got a peg leg with a kickstand (3X)
Ya mama, ya mama, ya mama

Verse Four: Imani

Awwwwwwww, ya mom is so fat (how fat is she?)
We rode up on her back to get some burgers from Wendy's
and her skates went flat; I got stuck in her butt crack
They thought I was lost but I was caught by the G-strap
Heaven forbid a giant fart would give way
Cause that would blow me round the world in a day
We drove into the drive-in and she didn't have to pay
because we dressed her up to look just like a Chevrolet

Refrain:

Naked on a mountain top tootin on a flizoot
Ridin on a horse, drinkin whisky out a bizoot
With the wings and the teeth of an african bat, ba-aa-aa-at
Her middle name is Mudbone and on top of all that

Ya mama's got an afro, with a chin strap (3X)
Ya mama, ya mama, ya mama

Outro:

Ya mama got snake skin teeth
Ya mama wears coat hangers for earrings , dude she looks like.... hehehe
Ya mama was making sex threats to Ricky Bell and ****
Ya mama jacked the Kool-aid man for a sip, *****
Ya mama was walking down on Sunset with a 99 cent sign on her back
(You're a sellout) ya mama's a sellout ***** ya mama
***** ya mama did a pop tune *****
Ya mama's glasses are so thick she look into a map
and see people wavin at her
Your mother got an Ouija board on her back
Sidney with EQ and everything what he be sayin
His mother be hooked, fishin with a hook and reel at the frozen food section
Tre's mama got Playdough teeth
Ya mother be eatin daisies like Now and Laters and ****
Ya mama's an extra on the Simpsons and ****
Ya mama's so fat you can't even see her legs
it just looks like she's just gliding across the floor...

Answer 2

Yo mamas so fat her blood type is Ragu. Yo mamas so dumb she was workin at the inspection line for M&M's and she threw away all the ones that had a W on them.

Answer 3

I only know:
Yo Mama is so fat ythat when she sat on the airplane she sat next to everybody. And
YO Mama is so dumb, big and fat that she chased a school bus thinkin it was a twinkie!

Answer 4

Yo mama's so fat she eats the universe as an appetizer.

Answer 5

Yo mama's so dumb so failed the blood test.


I heard yo mama's so dumb she took the IQ test and the results came back negative..



I try...I try....

Answer 6

yo mama so poor I saw her the other day with only one shoe.... asked her if she lost a shoe and she said no I found one!

Answer 7

Yo mama's so fat, when she ran away, they had to put her picture on the milk truck.

Yo mama's so fat, when she hauls ***, she has to make two trips.

Yo mama's so fat, when she dances at a club, she makes the band skip.

Yo mama's so fat, on Halloween she trick or treats two houses at a time.

Yo mama's so fat, I had to take a train and two busses just to get on her good side.

Yo mama's so fat, when she ran away, they had to use all four sides of the milk carton.

Yo mama's so fat, she fills up the bath tub, and then she turns on the water.

Yo mama's so fat, they had to grease a door frame and hold a Twinkie on the other side to get her through.

Yo mama's so fat, when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down.

Yo mama's so fat, when she was diagnosed with the flesh eating disease, the doctor gave her 5 years to live.

Yo mama's so fat, her picture takes two frames.

Yo mama's so fat, when your dad climbs on top of her, his ears pop.

Yo mama's so fat, every time she wears high heels, she strikes oil.

Yo mama's so fat, her blood type is Ragu.

Yo mama's so fat, when I climbed up on top of her, I burned my *** on the lightbulb.

Yo mama's so fat, the back of her neck looks like a pack of hot-dogs.

Yo mama's so fat, she DJ's for the ice cream truck.

Yo mama's so fat, when she takes a shower, her feet don't get wet.

Yo mama's so fat, she can't wear Dazzey Dukes. She has to wear Boss Hoggs.

Yo mama's so fat, the shadow of her *** weighs 50 pounds.

Yo mama's so fat, the ***** jumped in the air and got stuck.

Yo mama's so stupid, she spent twenty minutes lookin' at an orange juice box because it said "concentrate".

Yo mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to makeup her mind.

Yo mama's so stupid, she thought Grape Nuts was an STD.

Yo mama's so stupid, she saw a billboard that said "Dodge Trucks" and she started ducking through traffic.

Yo mama's so stupid, she uses Old Spice for cooking.

Yo mama's so stupid, when she took you to the airport and a sign said "Airport Left," she turned around and went home.

Yo mama's so stupid, she thought she could get food stamps at the post office.

Yo mama's so stupid that under "Education" on her job application, she put "Hooked on Phonics."

Yo mama's so stupid, it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes.

Yo mama's so stupid, on her job application where it says emergency contact she put 911.

Yo mama's so ugly, her shadow quit.

Yo mama's so ugly, she could only be Yo mama.

Yo mama's so ugly, they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower.

Yo mama's so ugly, they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.

Yo mama's so ugly, when she looks in the mirror, the reflection ducks.

Yo mama's so ugly, her birth certificate was an apology letter from the condom factory.

Yo mama's so ugly, she looks like she's been in a dryer filled with rocks.

Answer 8

Yo momma's so fat..
when she goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to install speed bumps.

Answer 9

Who scratched her head with your toes?
Yo Mamma!

Answer 10

yo mama is so ugly she put the boogy man out of business.
Yo mama is so ugly she makes Michael Jackson look like brad pitt.
yo mama is so ugly she looked out her window and was arrested for indecent exposure.
Yo mama is so stupid it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes. yo mama is so stupid she tried to commit suicide by jumping out her basement window.
Yo mama is so fat when she bends over we eneter daylight savings time.
Yo mama is so fat she fell into the Grand Canyon and got stuck. Yo mama is so fat shes once, twice, three times the lady.
Yo mama is so fat she uses a matress for a maxipad.
Yo mama is so poor burgulars break into her house and leave money.
Yo mama is so poor the building society repossed her cardboard box.
Yo mama is so poor she watches t.v. on an Etch-A-Sketch.
Yo mama is so poor she goes to KFC to lick other peoples fingers.
Yo mama is so poor she had to take out a second mortgage on her cardboard box.
Yo mama has got a major weight problem, she cant wait to eat. Yo mama is a carpenters dream flat as a board and easy to nail. Yo mamas feet are so skanky that when your family wants jam pieces, she gets yo brother to run a loaf of bread between her toes.
Yo mama is like a televison, even a 2 year old can turn her on. Yo mama is so clumsy she got tangled up in a moblie phone. Yo mama is so nice, she offered me the hair off her back.
Yo mama is like a golf course, everyone gets a hole in one.
Yo mama is so ugly, she is so good at her job, being a scarecrow. Yo mama is like a 747, 3 man **** pit.
Yo mama is like a hardware store. 10 cents per screw.
Yo mama is like a a shotgun, first she cocks then she blows.
Yo mama is like a door knob cause everybody gets a turn. Yo mama is like a stamp, youlick her, you stick her and then you send her away.
Yo mama is like McDonalds, Billions and Billions served.
Yo mama is like a railroad track, she gets laidall over the country. Yo mama is like the Pillsbury Dough boy, everyone likes to poke her.
Yo mama is like Peanut Butter so creamy and smooth and easy to spread.
Yo mama is so smelly, when she spread her legs, I got seasick. Yo mama is so smelly that farmers use her bath water as liquid fertilizer.
Yo mama is so dirty that Saddam Hussain tried to import her bath water to make chemical weapons.
Yo mama is so greasy Texaco buys oil from her.
Yo mama is so greasy she uses bacon as a band aid.
Yo mama is like a pirate, there she blows.
Yo mama is so stupid she took aruler to bed to see how long she slept.
Yo mama is so stupid, on a job appliction is said sex and she put monday, wednesday and sometimes frida.
Yo mama is so old that instead of saying are we there yet from the back seat, you say is she dead yet.
Yo mama is so hairy that when you were born you almost died from rugburn.
Yo mama is so stupid she got locked in a bathroom and almosted peed her pants.
Yo mama is so big, she trips over walmart and lands on target and every time she passes by the T.V. I miss a season of friends.
Yo mama is so fat that she stepped on a airplane it became a submarine.
Yo mamas teeth are so yellow that cars slow down when she smiles.
Yo mama is like a fast food restaurant, Quick and easy.
Yo mama is like a shot gun 5 cocks and she is loaded.
Yo mama is like nascar two rubbers and she is ready to ride.
Yo mama is so dumb, she brought a spoon to the super bowl.
Yo mama is so bald, Mr. Clean got jealous.
Yo mama is so fat the last time she saw 90210 it was on the scale.
Yo mama is so fat that she shoved a battery up her *** and said, I've got the power.
Yo mama is like a screen door, a couple of bangs and she loosens up.
Yo mama is like a snickers bar, packed full of nuts.
Yo mama is like a race car driver, she burns up a lot of rubbers. Yo mama is so fat and stupid, her waste is bigger than her IQ. Yo mama is such a *****, she interned for Clinton.