one of my best friends is hanging out with the wrong crud... need help?

Question

one of my bs has befriended this girl who has a history with drougs, alcohol and all the stuff mom try to keep their children from... my friend is also going out with her jobless, without-college, crazy brother.... i want to help her understand that she is ruining her life... because i still care... any tips please

Answer 1

Unfortunately, there's not much you can do, other than be supportive and set a good example. The more you get on her case about her hanging out with the wrong crowd, the more she'll be drawn to them and the more she'll view you as an oppressive parental figure - which is not fun. Always keep in mind that even the best of us can be petty - if she senses that you feel in any way threatened by her new friendships, she could perceive this as you being jealous of her new friends monopolizing her time, and will only further encourage her. Try a little reverse psychology every once and awhile - it unfortunately gets you a lot farther than being straightforward with people. I don't mean for you to be dishonest, just don't share all your thoughts with her. If you do share your thoughts, she may very likely just view you as creating a wedge between her and her new friends. Hopefully, she'll come back around to her senses. You're a good friend that you care so much about her, and I'm sure that through your actions, not your criticisms, that that will eventually shine through.

Answer 2

Let me tell you this if you have talked to her already and she is not listening to you and she continues to do what she wants anyway well my only solution for you is let her learn on her own...Sometimes it takes people to learn from there own mistakes rather for them to listen to a person that really cares enough for you to try to help...The other thing is that the majority of these people who have people like yourself who try always later on feel like they have wasted there breath...so my advice to you and this is if you want to talk to her again and if she doesn't listen to what you are trying to say then you have to be the one to step back and let the chips fall where they may lay. Now reading your statement you might have not tried as of recently but you do have to make an effort to let her understand that this also damaging the relationship with the children...Talk to her and see what happens then all you can do is try...Like a good friend you are.

Answer 3

Well there is no way you can make somebody listen to you they got to want to listen to u cause you can't force nobody to do anything.But one thing you can to is try to help your best friend and don't give up on your friend no matter how hard it is getting because a true friend will stick next to you no matter how hard things are getting. So you be that true friend and show your friend no matter what you are going to be there.and try to sit down and talk to your friend try to hang out with her more and show them how life can be fun without all those negative influence around her. Well i hope i helped you a lilttle bit so good luck and keep your head up and let your friend know that you love her.

Answer 4

she probably just gets mad at you and calls you a ***** when you bring it up, eh?

if that's the case maybe she's found her true calling...being a low life. worst-case scenario if she's in trouble and doing stupid **** call the cops on her and show her the consequesces of being the smut of the city....

lessons learned best from lessons. (bad boys bad boys, whatcha gonna do? whatcha gonna do when they come for you?)

Answer 5

Go ahead and tell her. You are friends after all.