My husband died four years ago. His brother asked me out and I'm definetly interested, but I con't know what the familiy will say.
2006-11-11 01:09:42 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
ya i think that's fine go for it
2006-11-11 01:13:48 · answer #1 · answered by badboy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who's family? I don't find any thing wrong with it. If they do, then really that's making it ugly> almost sick way of thinking. But I would bet there will be a few out there, that are sick.
So! Be prepared. I would really weigh out the good and the bad. Would it be worth it all, (say more that half got weird about.) Say the two of you didn't work out as a couple, now you have not only dated your husband brother, you left him . Just more talk and talk.
Hey! if its worth it and you feel something, Then go for it. Let it be there problem and not yours. But don't go out of your way to hide it either. If love and happiness finds your way again, don't let anyone take it way from you, Enjoy and Let the chips fall where they may.
2006-11-11 01:40:59 · answer #2 · answered by livelovelaugh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my husband went thru this as we were dating. his brother had died an he was there to help make arrangments an go through the sad funeral an help in putting his brother away. the sister-in-law took a liking to him and so did her mother. even the mother requested my man ask her out ! inwhich , he said he had a girlfriend an was never interested in her that way. she felt as family an knew his brother would of been very upset in all this , had he been alive to see it. he wanted to be there for the nephew not to help heal the inlaw. i went through hell was treated like **** by this family. so i know if it is the other way around it must also fit this shoe as well. NO i don't feel it to be right to date someone who was once an inlaw.
2006-11-11 01:28:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people will judge you, but 4 years is a respectable amount of time to mourn. If you want to date the brother, I say go for it and the other family members be damned.
2006-11-11 01:12:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's OK---you both loved your husband and have grieved for him.
In historical times it was the norm for such things. In fact, Henry VIII whole reason to divorce his first wife of many years was because he suddenly felt it wasn't right to have married his brother's widow.....thus beginning the Church of England. I know not relevant.
You deserve to be happy and if the family is OK with it---and even if they aren't--it's your life.
Good luck!
2006-11-11 01:15:58 · answer #5 · answered by Lori 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
something like this is hard....especially when you both have feelings for each other....i think that all kinds of problems could arise from this not just with the family, but what if you find this man starting to question himself as to can he live up to the standards of his brother, not that he should have to, but I'm sure he will feel like this sooner or later especially in the bedroom area, he himself i think might develop insecurities.....i not sure if it is a good idea, but it is your life, and depending how strong your feelings for each other. Good Luck.
2006-11-11 01:21:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Turn the situation around...how do you think your family would feel if the tables were turned and you past away and your husband wanted to date your sisterl...I mean...I don't think that it would be a very good idea, but every one is different. They may be okay with that. Everyone deserves to be happy, so even though I wouldn't do it, doesn't mean that it's wrong. You just need to look inside yourself to see if that will truly make you happy, or just make you feel weird.
2006-11-11 01:16:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I see no reason you should have to gain the permission from his family, it should be a joyful thing seeing two harts finding each other. knowing that if some member of his family find this relationship as being inappropriate the both of you two need to be the only judges in your relationship, it's your time to find a partner if you want to and you have no need to explain yourself to others. best of luck with your new found love and enjoy the feeling in your hart.
2006-11-11 02:03:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL...I think it's funny, those people tht think it wouldn't work out::
You all would DEFINITELY have lot of common bckground already- - I think it would be fantastic, & that your relationship would be strengthened by the fact tht you re both bound by ties of love to his brother. I think I could almost say it would be "natural" :: Best wishes to you, & mybe you could tlk things over with the Mom here, etc (just as a courtesy...feel that one out & do it only if you feel she's one you cn "talk to", you know?)
2006-11-11 01:44:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes! Who cares what the family will say! Some of the familily might feel akward, but they will get over it. This is his life and your life.
Lets play the what if game-
What if you lived happily ever after?
Congrats, now go call him and set up a lunch date for today!
2006-11-11 01:16:35 · answer #10 · answered by earinfection 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Four years is enough time to show that you are not hurrying in to anything. You can not stop how you feel. Is he a decent man? Is he honest and trustworthy? If he is and if you are drawn to be with him, then just use some common sense and compassion and all will be well.
2006-11-11 01:13:44 · answer #11 · answered by Isis 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋