I've been planning a bus trip for months to go upstate. I have 50 paid guests going on the trip. We recently found out that my husband's grandmother passed away and the funeral is the same day as my bus trip. My problem is that I want to be there for him but I can't cancel the trip one week before the date. The bus company does not give refunds this close to the trip and it is a full bus. One of my relatives was going to drive 9 hours to come on the trip to help me out as my assistant. She said she would host the trip without me but she doesn't know anything at all about the area and I can tell she is uncomfortable doing so but just willing to help. I am pregnant with my first and been going through quite a bit of stress lately. This situation is stressful because I feel I have a duty to my husband but also to the 50 people going on the trip and my family going to help out. My husband told me to stay and do the trip since it was planned. What would you do (serious replies only pls)?
2006-11-11 01:00:24 · 9 answers · asked by Lia 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If your husband was close to his Grandmother then you should be going to the funeral. You hav e someone to take over and a week to teach her stuff about the area. If he wasn't close to her, go on your trip.
2006-11-11 01:06:27 · answer #1 · answered by lynnca1972 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very interesting situation there Lia. Personally I would do the trip because you have a responsibility to the people who have booked and paid for the trip and as you say it would create great complications if you were to cancel the trip at short notice and lose everyones payments.Your husband has told you to stay and do the trip as planned. I know it is a tragedy to lose a member of ones family and I think you husband is strong enough to handle things himself, just make sure that after your bus trip is over to be there for your husband with lots of love and support. So have fun on the bus trip and try to reduce your stress so as not to cause yourself or your baby any problems.
2006-11-11 01:16:45 · answer #2 · answered by AussiePete 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is a sticky choice. But, your husband will be going to furnnel and you have a situtation that needs tooken care of and there is no way you can change it or just lose all that money you just paid for. Send flowers with a card with regrets not being able to attend. This is really all you can do. The woman is dead and your husband will have other family there for comfort and you have a trip that can not be changed and 50 people that has made arrangements just to go. Your husband will understand so will the others! One may die but, the sun still rises the next day and business still goes on as it was meant to be!
2006-11-11 01:09:51 · answer #3 · answered by MagikButterfly 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a tough decision for you to make. My Grandmother died a couple of years ago and my wife had never met her. My wife and her Mom and brother had a trip planned to go to Ft.Lauderdale to visit her sister that she only gets to see once a year at Christmas the same weekend as the funeral. My wife was willing to cancel her trip right away to go with me to the funeral. The fact that she was willing to cancel meant alot to me but I told her to go ahead & take her trip. I was going to have my family there and wanted her to go ahead and enjoy herself. She reluctantly went on. I think you should first tell your husband you feel like you need to be with him and let him tell you his true feelings. Decide from there. If you have someone who can take over the trip for you maybe you should consider it. I think the best thing to do is to let your husband give you his true feelings about it and then decide what is best for both of you. If you take the trip don't feel guilty if he tells you to go.
2006-11-11 01:19:55 · answer #4 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You obviously are feeling bad for your husband but if hes says its okay to go, than you should. Youve invested a lot of time and money into this trip, you should go. Your husband and his family will understand, that the situation is out of your control.
Have fun on your trip!! :)
2006-11-11 01:05:25 · answer #5 · answered by Motherload 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would do as my husband said and host the trip. He will have other family at the funeral to support him and he knows best if he can cope without you.
2006-11-11 01:06:33 · answer #6 · answered by dragonrider707 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no doubt about what you need to do and you already know it, don't you?
You have to go to the funeral.
Allow your relative to host the trip and tell her to be open to suggestions from the group.
If anyone in the group is dissatisfied, that's too bad; suggest a sensitivity training group for that person or persons to attend.
2006-11-11 01:09:01 · answer #7 · answered by ha_mer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-12-14 05:16:35 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband sounds like he understands. Be sure to be supportive of him in his loss, but if he says go, then go. But be sure he really means it and won't hold it against you later. Also be sure that his other family members understand your situation, even if they don't agree, so there will be less hard feelings later.
2006-11-11 01:13:09 · answer #9 · answered by bigwheeler19 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋