Dont any of you want to be treated like a princess anymore? I've been married for 13 years and I want out. I dont ask her to work unless she wants to and I do all the housework. I am there for her nomatter what. I've been faithfull anlthough she has not. What more should a man have to do? I dont want to hear about marriage counceling because I've brought that up before and she tells me all I need is to be on some sort of medication to balance my emotions. We are intimate once every three weeks and that is just unacceptable. I want out. Am I wrong?
2006-11-10 23:14:59 · 27 answers · asked by This too shall pass 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
What is stopping me is my fear fo being alone. I do know that this fear is why I've taken it for so long. So I suppose my situation is partially my fault.
2006-11-10 23:51:51 · update #1
Your scared of being alone? Well, whats your number, seriously man, I have been looking for a guy like you my whole life!! It sounds to me like your wife knows that she has you right where she wants you. I mean, you said in your own words that she can do whatever ever she wants, whenever she wants and not suffer the consiquenses. In other words, she knows that you are not going anywhere and knows that no matter what she does, your gonna stick with her. You don't need medication!!!! You need a girlfriend that doesnt mind being treated with respect and respects you right back!! You are not wrong in leaving at all!! As a matter of fact, you should have left a lonnnnnnggg time ago, like say WHEN SHE CHEATED!!! I am a firm believer that cheating is the worst thing you could do in a marriage. It distroys your whole marriage, trust, LIFE, and the kids lives too!!! It is the most selfish thing you could do!! It totally makes you feel like it is your fault when it isnt. Sounds to me like SHE is the one who needs counseling!! So, my answer to you is GET OUT!!!! If for some reason you decide you just cant do it, here are some tips for making her turn your way again.
#1) Leave just for a little while, say a couple of days, she will be crawling back to you!!
#2) Stop showing emotions...I mean be so cold hearted that even she could feel the chill!!
#3) Start a new hobby, and start filling your time up with it. She will wonder what this "New Hobby" has that she don't.
#4) Stop giving her attention. The telivison is a great way to accomplish this. My personal fav shows are - Lost - Grey's Anatomy - Deperate Housewives - Weed's on Showtime - Dexter on Showtime. This way you will be devoting your time and attention to these shows every week and not her. She will be crawling back in bed in no time to watch TV with you!!
I know that this is long winded, but I fear that your really not gonna leave, if I dont tell you this stuff. She does not deserve you at all!! Don't be scared to be alone. Ther are plenty of things out there to get involved in that will take you mind off of her. clawbeaja@yahoo.com if you need anymore advise!!
2006-11-11 00:18:30 · answer #1 · answered by clawbeaja 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
most of us want to be treated like a princess. The problem usually come in defining the word. Ok so she has no responsibilities,if she is being unfaithful then maybe you haven't been there as much as you think you have. Does she have a point about the medication and a possible hormonal level. i don't know you or live with you so i'm just asking. Intimate can mean more than just sex to a woman, why don't you men get that!!
2006-11-11 00:15:13 · answer #2 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men like you are far and few between and from what you have explained,maybe you do need some medicine to balance you out , i sure would. It is a stressful situation for you and there is only so much you can do. Sounds like you have done it and now it may be time for you to take care of you. And yes, there are women out there that would love to have a man like you. Marriage is a 50/50 proposition. Move on, and the next time you don't have to treat her like a princess. All we want is to be loved, respected for who we are and what we do, as you would want to be treated and be treated as an equal. Maybe you went overboard on this one and ruined her. LOL good luck
2006-11-10 23:32:20 · answer #3 · answered by shyone 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You don't deserve this but you've taken it nonetheless. People will take advantage of someone like you - because you open yourself to it. Believe me, that is me too. We want to treat others like we've wanted treated. Problem is, you are doing all the giving. She quit along time ago. Of course she doesn't want counseling, she would have to see what her problems are. This way, she can continue to use and abuse you. I think most of us have a fear of being alone. Human nature - wanting someone to love us. If only it were that simple.
Take time out. Tell her that you are done. Then do it. Get out on your own, and take a breather. You need it. Don't commit to anyone until you've healed. You need the time to heal and collect your thoughts. This sounds like a cycle - maybe talking with a therapist yourself. Heal inside and out. When you are ready, you will find the one that is for you. To love you as you deserve. I hope you will do this. It is what you need. Good luck and God bless.
2006-11-11 01:21:46 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh I love being treated as a princess. I love to treat my man as a king. You are not what I would call a perfect husband. I want a man who is strong, who doesn't let me have everything my way, who doesn't do everything for me and doesn't let me have everything I want. It will be boring, boring and boring. I want him to be a man who has an opinion a strong one, one who makes more of the big decisions, one that gets mad and challenges me when needed. one that stimulates my being from head to toe. One that takes action. Plays good guy, bad guy. One that makes me laugh, that's a must.
Are you wrong about what? wanting out? Is it that she doesn't putout the reason or the other facts. I believe we all have the right to be happy and to live our lives the way we choose..You like what you are and that's what you want to be and you should have someone in our life that appreciates that. So no wrong or right here. Find happiness, find your happiness.
2006-11-11 00:15:35 · answer #5 · answered by livelovelaugh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like she's just not into you and she's soaking it all up as much as she can.
Consult a lawyer.
have you thought about therapy for yourself? You sound like a sweet person, BUT, you probably have some hurt that you *may* need assistance sorting them out and getting over it in a timely fashion. This will help you so you will be able to recognize this same type of woman in the future so you DON'T get mixed up with those types again and get hurt again. You deserve so much more in life. Life is too short to be living with someone like that.
2006-11-10 23:48:19 · answer #6 · answered by Jennifer L 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you got married I bet you did not feel like this, try to bring back the magic you two had before. You must be able to communicate with her. Maybe she wants out too, but if the both of you want to continue you both must agree to the terms of your marriage. You can treat her like a princess, but if you expect to be treated like a king she needs to know this. You both have to come to terms with the expectations you have for the future success or failure in your marriage.
2006-11-11 00:38:45 · answer #7 · answered by MeToo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her something has to change or you're leaving. If she cares enough about you, she'll try to make it work. And if she doesn't, as hard as it may seem, you need to break it off. I know being alone seems scary, but having the opportunity to be free and meet women who will appreciate and love you is far better than feeling trapped in a loveless marriage.
Good luck ~
2006-11-10 23:54:48 · answer #8 · answered by ....... 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes we want to be treated like princess'. I don't know what planet you wife's living on but it's not earth. She needs a good kick in the butt to wake herself up. All men should be like you. No, it's not wrong at all to want out. I know a few womane who would just die to marry you, not me though coz I have a wonderful man like you, but he doesn't do any housework. Got some pointers there.............lol
2006-11-10 23:22:59 · answer #9 · answered by rach 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
So get out.
No, I don't want to be treated like a princess.
And I don't want a servant either.
If you have told your wife you are unhappy and she is unwilling to go to counseling or acknowledge her 'stuff', then your only recourse is to either decide to accept things as is or make a change.
Marriage is a partnership - find a good partner. Best of luck!
2006-11-10 23:22:42 · answer #10 · answered by Pam 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋