next boyfriend before marriage? Since she is now "tainted" is premarital sex such a big deal?
2006-11-10 10:04:18 · 16 answers · asked by Laughing Libra 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Why is she "tainted"? Because she had sex? That is a crock of crap. A woman has every right to be every bit as sexual as a man. She's not tainted by one man or 100. This idea of "tainted" is one that men have put impressed upon women to protect their fragile male ego because they are threatened by her past lovers being bigger, or better, etc. This is such a chauvinsitic ideal. It makes me furious that women still think they are inferior because they want to, like to have sex, or may have had sex with several men or dozens of men.
I love this passage by Eric Jong. It sums up the Christian ideal of the "pure woman" very well:
“The Virgin Mary is a sanitized version of the Mother Goddess – sanitized and fragmented. She is Woman devoid of her sexuality, Woman giving birth without human intercourse, Woman as unbroken hymen, the child-woman, the ideal of the “female eunuch” which Christianity has imposed upon one-half of the human species as the price of their very survival upon this earth… Christianity claims to honor the woman as mother but does not acknowledge her power to give life. Thus Woman is doomed to live in a double bind which is at once psychological and physical: she is damned for doing the very thing that keeps the race alive. Man, for his part, is damned for partaking of that guilty sexuality, and doomed to wander the world turning virgins into whores, then cursing his fate in having no true mate to love.” ~ Erica Jong
I revel in my wife's sexuality and I am not threatened by any of her past lovers or ex's. Why should I be? She's not with any of them, she's with me.
2006-11-10 10:19:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a personal question. If she was that religious in the beginning than she may not want to have sex however if she is a devoted Catholic then she does not believe in Divorce. I personally think that as an adult premarital sex is not a big deal. If you really look into it. According to the bible you were not able to have sex before marriage however it did not matter back then as you were married around 16 years old and dead by 40. Now a days if you are older tahn 16 or 18 then I think you are OK after that.
2006-11-10 18:10:22 · answer #2 · answered by Itry 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK you've been raised wrong no offense but "Tainted" come on. What was tainted was your marriage not to be rude but that is what you needed to take seriously but if it didn't work out understandable. It is OK to have premarital sex to get a feel for what you want and need sexually in your life. Don't feel bad for doing it.
2006-11-10 18:20:54 · answer #3 · answered by ~InEvItAbLe~ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Would you buy a pair of shoes without trying them on first? Right or wrong, in today's society it is ok to have premarital sex. be cautious of std's and of unwanted pregnancies. Very few people this day and age feel that premarital sex is wrong. Life is to short to worry about how other people view your life, or your decisions. remember.....be true to your self. After all you are the only one you have to live with for the rest of your life.
2006-11-10 18:09:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I could not even read the other responses on here...I was laughing and then shaking my head in wonder!!
If this is a worry, ask a pastor, don't ask ppl on Yahoo. Everyone is supposed to develop their own morals and standards.
If she has sex without marriage it is still premarital again.
(virgin or not).
2006-11-10 19:06:23 · answer #5 · answered by strong1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is okay, after all you did save yourself for marriage the first time. And sometimes you learn more about a guy if you have sex before marriage since it tends to bring you closer!
2006-11-10 18:07:16 · answer #6 · answered by Tammy R 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
she's not 'tainted' nor damaged goods. Premarital sex is a personal choice, but as those who engage in it are likelier to get divorced, as are those who have been divorced before... I would think she would want to keep the odds in her favor as much as possible.
2006-11-10 18:07:35 · answer #7 · answered by czekoskwigel 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sick.
Do you eat squirrel and discuss this with toothless people?
Does the theme to Deliverance bring back good memories?
She was tainted before the marriage by all that oppressive Bible Belt BS.
2006-11-10 18:07:42 · answer #8 · answered by Erad 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, a woman is not "tainted" because she makes love.
Premarital sex is only a big deal if that is what you want it to be. Don't guilt yourself out if you want to be intimate with this person.
Protect yourself from pregnancy and STD's...........and love your decision!!
2006-11-10 18:08:26 · answer #9 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That depends completely on her. I personally feel that as long as you are a mature adult and in a caring relationship whether married or not a physical relationship is normal and wonderful but she needs to do what she feels good about doing or not doing
2006-11-10 18:08:56 · answer #10 · answered by buffybot67 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋