had suspitions before------now i know
2006-11-10 09:57:17 · 39 answers · asked by mcspic63 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This is fake, right?
2006-11-10 09:59:03 · answer #1 · answered by Smith Smith 3 · 1⤊ 3⤋
Wow Hun! I'm sorry you have to go through this. I would show her the tape and while she's watching the t.v. you watch her expression. It will most likely be horror over being caught. Then I think you need to get away. You don't have to end your relationship per say, but get out of the house for a week, month, however long it takes for you decide how you want to proceed in life. Try to not say anything to her. If she wants to explain, listen then leave. The worst decisions are made in the heat of the moment. Do what feels right to you and only you.
As for your "friend", I say send him a copy of the tape and say "thanks for the friendship" and leave it at that. Good luck to you.
2006-11-10 10:08:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You know what to do, I think you're just looking for validation for your next move. Make a time to confront your spouse, if she denies the action, play the tape and ask her what she thinks you should do. There will be, no doubt, tears and regret, but remember a relationship is built on trust and she has destroyed yours. Or simply make a copy, leave it for her where she can find it easily and then leave. If you don't want to leave your home forever, come back when she is gone, pack her things, leave them on the door step and change the locks. Don't return her calls and refuse to see her. No need to discuss anything further if you are truly done with this relationship. Good luck, this is an awful time for you I am sure.
2006-11-10 10:05:47 · answer #3 · answered by crkristy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow!!!!!!! OK so you got proof and ammunition. You need to think before you react. If you love your wife enough to forgive her then you need to talk it through but if not then do what you have to do and move on. I t may be hard if you have kids. Two wrongs don't make a right but here is a suggestion: I say find a hot girl and play the tape and have your wife walk in on y'all having wild sex that would get her attention.
2006-11-10 10:05:33 · answer #4 · answered by ~InEvItAbLe~ 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
It depends, do you have children? You need to realize that no matter how angry you are at her if there are children involved you must protect them at all cost's. No matter how much she hurt you this is an adult thing and the children should never know. Telling them will only hurt them. Go talk to a lawyer and file for divorce. Confront your wife but don't be stupid.
You need to realize that there were issues before she cheated. No one cheats unless there are problems or they are missing something. Maybe her lack of respect for you prior to this should be a reason for divorce.
2006-11-10 10:03:00 · answer #5 · answered by Itry 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Did you know that one of the top male fantasies is a husband watching his wife have sex with another man? No Kidding. You may want to look up the term "Hotwife". Many married couples do this. It's not cheating if you know about it. Weird to some but normal to others. Here is a link http://www.ourhotwives.org/forum/.
2006-11-10 10:50:17 · answer #6 · answered by iwanln 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LEAVE. I don't think there is any excuse for that deep of a betrayal by either the spouse or friend. I'd walk out and hand her a copy of the tape the origional may come in handy when you file for divorce and leave her high and dry! You my friend deserve better.
2006-11-10 10:05:07 · answer #7 · answered by buffybot67 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Honestly.........stay in control of your anger.
Ask her to leave (today.) to give you thinking and breathing room *you deserve it*. Schedule time to talk about the situation in 2-3 days.......don't take any phone calls from her.
Then decide what to do. Write it downs......Pros (being married to her) and Cons (being married to her). If you want the marriage it will take a considerable amount of change in order for your wife to earn your trust back, but it can be done.
You stay in control. Don't use anger or threats. And of course, if there are any babies involved .......... be a great Dad.
Best wishes!
2006-11-10 10:02:33 · answer #8 · answered by ? 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
now that u know the truth, let her have the other guy, let her live with it,and go forward not backwards. if a person is constantly looking behind them, that wil be their future. truth hurts, and your one of the lucky ones, that u have seen it with your own eyes, and u won't have to go through the pain of unknowing. you will never feel the same about her, or trust her again no matter what she says when u confront her.u trusted her completely, and she has betrayed your love, and unfortunatly i don't think one can ever get past something as horrific as this.
2006-11-10 10:11:43 · answer #9 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well hes not a friend any more!
Lawyer Up and give the tape to to your attorney! You dont leave the house make her go! Otherwise its abandoment! She will probably get nothing out of the divorce!
Good Luck!
2006-11-10 10:03:42 · answer #10 · answered by decorator101 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Use the tape as evidence in your divorce proceedings so you won't have to pay any alimony. That's really the only good result. Consider yourself lucky you didn't acquire an STD.
2006-11-10 10:15:52 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋