Ok so I've been with my guy for bout a year and a half. We've had our ups and def have had our downs. This past summer we were broken up due to the fact that there were some rumours going around that he was unfaithful. There was no evidence so though it hurt me like crazy, I took him back. So ever since part of me feels that he hasn't but then theres the other that feels that he has.
Now the real problem. I met this guy about a month or two ago and we've been chatting quite a bit on the side for sometime. It started out as just being associates since we know all the same people but slowly we are starting to like each other. I feel TERRIBLE being as to I'm in a relationship and I tried to stop talking to this other guy but I just cant. I love the guy I'm with but I cant help what I am feeling towards this other guy.
2006-11-10 09:14:07 · 23 answers · asked by TheLight 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Wow all you guys are awesome! Thank you so much for all your advice.
2006-11-10 09:29:34 · update #1
Oh and I DO love my boyfriend the I think the problem is maybe I'm not IN love with him as I use to be.
2006-11-10 09:31:13 · update #2
I will tell you this from expierence. I used to love my bf, but I used to like other guys. I would start having feelings for them, but I wouldn't want to lose my bf. Well now that I'm older I know that it wasn't real love if I let other relationships happen. Plus he would find out and I would feel horrible because I would chose him. However, if you love your bf and want things to work out, then be committed to him and don't talk to the other guy anymore, or anyone. If you really feel unsure, then give it a rest, and move on with your life. My ex also had cheated on me and I took him back. Seven years later, we broke up, because he was still cheating. Good Luck.
2006-11-10 09:31:33 · answer #1 · answered by Susa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, honestly, whether there was no evidence to support the rumour that he cheated on you, its obvious that your trust in him has been broken. If he did, he isn't going to tell you. If you really love him, you have to forgive, and trust him again. If you have even the smallest amount of question as to his faithfulness, then it will always be there, and maybe you should think about moving on and enjoying your chatting time with the other guy instead of feeling terrible about it. If he did cheat on you, more than likely he'll do it again
2006-11-10 09:31:23 · answer #2 · answered by Notorious Pink 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You probably shouldn't be with this guy... I always had that problem... Being with a guy that i loved but looking at someone else... When you meet the person you're meant to be with you trust them, you don't look at other people and have feelings for them and if it happened you would be able to stop this realtionship on the side because of your other realtionship... As much as it sucks to be alone drop your guy it seems your realtionship was to damaged by the whole summer thing... Good luck to you.
2006-11-10 09:20:31 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
People in general use the term 'love' much too loosely these days. If you really loved him you would know what to do. You would avoid all temptation, including your "friend". Love is unselfish. love is sacrifice. Since you don't really love him, and your having feelings for this other guy you should just end it with him and tell him the truth. Stay single for a while until you have a chance to sort out your feelings.
2006-11-10 09:26:01 · answer #4 · answered by Nicole G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-12-28 18:16:57 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The bestway is to handle the relationship you are in before you start (or upgrade) the new one.
Take some time to figure out if your current relationship is where you want to be. If not, quit wasting your bfs time and let him move on.
If it is what you want, then end it with the new guy, because there is no room for a third in a healthy relationship.
2006-11-10 09:17:02 · answer #6 · answered by Rum_Punch_Girlie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well do what your instincs tell you. Wonder if the guy you resently met has no hidden baggage, for example negative flaws or habits, wonder as well if what you starting to feel is a physical attraction. Don't leave your guy if you sincerely trust him or feel something for him because if you do you will have this other feeling that won't stop like regreating leaving him. Go with what you believe feels right for you not what others think is right. who knows i could be wrong telling you to stay with your man if there is no mutual trust or respect.
2006-11-10 09:25:22 · answer #7 · answered by estrella20 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well now you have whats known as ''baggage'' with the first guy because of you thinking he may have cheated and apart of you will always believe that now... You don't have anything bad with this new guy and under neath it all you think, why not because in the back of your mind your boyfriend could just be a lieing cheat, there for causing you to want to run to this guy being that you have no issues with him.. It's a security thing, he makes you feel secure and your boyfriend does not...
2006-11-10 09:23:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, you have to stop using your boyfriend's behavior as an excuse for doing what you're doing. No matter what anyone else does, that does not give us the right to be as cruel and uncaring as they have been.
Second, be honest. If you don't want the current boyfriend anymore, tell him. Don't do to him what you say he has done to you. There is never a reason for mistreating someone, only a excuses. Be bigger than he was. Don't stoop to his level. That makes you no better than him.
Good luck
2006-11-10 09:22:38 · answer #9 · answered by sleepingbeauty123 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey girl....So i know exactly what your going through. You should definately break up and start talking with the new guy. Its sounds like you're not IN love with your b/f but you do love him as a person. Don't be scared to let him go. You never know it might be what he wants as well. This guy that you met could be the one for you. Don't pass up that chance.
2006-11-10 09:26:35 · answer #10 · answered by foxyred0220 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋