I have two friends that hate each other.They are making me choose a side.One friend I've known for a year.The other only a month and both of them can be annoying at times.I want to be both of their friends without hurting the other.But if I pick one side the other side would get hurt.What should I do?
2006-11-10 05:10:07 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
when worst comes down to worst.....go with the more popular one.
2006-11-10 05:12:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This sucks! There's no way around that... this sucks.
You will probably find that most people have been in this very situation at one time or another.... not everyone will like everyone else you know. Here's what I did when one of these situations became too intense for me; I told both of the people that I will not choose. If someone wants to do something, I'm happy to go with that person. The first plan is the one I'll be going with. If either of them decided that they cannot be friends with me if I'm friends with the other person, that one has just lost my respect and my friendship. A friend will never make you choose. Never.
Example:
Jon and Ben hate each other and each wants your time. Jon tells you that you need to dump Ben as a friend. You let Jon know that it isn't fair of him to tell you who you should be friends with. By making you choose, he is making your choice for you... Since a real friend would never stop you from making new friends, your real friend in this case is Ben. Jon has just shown himself to be less than concerned about your happiness. You don't need people like. You'll have enough of those people in your life that you can't do anything about (bosses, spouses, governments, etc.).
2006-11-10 05:31:47 · answer #2 · answered by stevegoryan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to both of the girls on an individual basis and find out why they don't like each other so much. Make sure that both of your friends don't gossip about each other and don't take sides either. After you've finished talking to both of them, all three of you guys get together and try to resolve the situation. It'll give your two friends an opportunity to get everything out in the air and hopefully, they'll become friends. If this approach doesn't work, it's entirely up to you on whom you want to be friends with or don't be bothered by neither one of them. Hope this helps. Good luck.
2006-11-10 05:18:01 · answer #3 · answered by Lady S 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need to pick sides or even one over the other. Their feud is between them and it's rude for them to ask what they are asking. I have a few friends that are annoyed by each other (totally different points of views and personalities) but I get along great with them one on one or with their group of friends. People will probably tell you to stick with the friend you've known for a year but you shouldn't have to choose.
2006-11-10 05:14:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them individually that they're being immature and that if either one of them want you to be their friend then they'll just have to deal with the fact that you happen to like both of them. Also tell them that they are not thinking about your feelings in this situation and that neither of them are showing what a true friend they are. They should be true friends and at least try to get along for your sake. Esp. if you're not forcing them to be together. If they can't handle that then tell them that they both lose. Go out and make new friends.
2006-11-10 05:15:29 · answer #5 · answered by S. Elizabeth 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Best way is to stay neutral. Tell them that you are both their friends and you can't pick a side. Try to reconcile them if you can with persuasion. Perhaps there's a misunderstanding between the two. If they were your REAL friends, then they wouldn't make you choose. They are being selfish this way...
2006-11-10 05:12:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a big family, they all dislike eachother alot. Im the only one who trys to talk to them all but most of the time I get screwed. My addvice is to tell them both" if you are my true friend except the fact that there will people in my life that you dont like ". Ask them if you didnt like somene how would they feel if you asked them to get rid of them ? Stand tall & good luck
2006-11-10 05:23:09 · answer #7 · answered by wanderlust111 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you shouldn't choose between your friends. What you should do is one weekend spend time with one firend, then the next weekend do the same with the other friend. If they have a problem wit it tell them that you would not chose because it will make everybody upset even more later.
2006-11-10 05:17:56 · answer #8 · answered by NAKIYA C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A true friend won't make you choose between them and someone else. They are just there, always, no matter what. If one is making you chose, tell them to get over it, or get lost. If both of them are making you chose, then neither one of them is a true friend.
2006-11-10 05:26:57 · answer #9 · answered by Nina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hate is a strong word. If they are asking you to choose, they are not really your friends. Why would you want to be friends with someone who doesnt respect your right to be friends with someone else or someone who makes unrealistic demans of you? Sounds like you could find much better people to be friends with.
2006-11-10 05:13:00 · answer #10 · answered by mama 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's no fun being in the middle ...and then, being made to choose. You could tell them that you don't want to lose either friend...and that it wouldn't be fair to you. If they are your friends, they'll see that they are hurting you by making you choose. You don't have to choose.
2006-11-10 05:23:52 · answer #11 · answered by Jou-Jou 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋