2006-11-10 04:43:06 · 18 answers · asked by ms attitude 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My first husband did this. He had pics of his ex-gf on the wall and on his headboard shelf for months after we were dating. I threw a fit, and he finally moved them. We got engaged later, and I found naked pics of her hidden in his drawers. That should have been my wakeup call. I wasn't too smart then I guess and married him anyway. Call him on it, and make him get rid of them, or at least pack them away out of sight and mind.
2006-11-10 04:48:28 · answer #1 · answered by nottashygirl 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
That shouldn't bother you unless its boudior (lingerie) pinup pictures. Because they were married she was probably a big part of his life, and there is nothing wrong with keeping memories of what probably was a large period of his life. I have some pictures of me and my ex-boyfriend. I did throw out anything where there was any intimacy hinted but group pictures or pictures from our vacation or pictures to events I keep because those were part of MY life too. And thats the thing, she only exsists in pictures because shes in the past, the point is that she IS in the past, not to eliminate the memory of her completely as though that relationship never happened. I think every relationship is an experience, even the bad ones, you walk away with more than you came into it with, sometimes its only an idea of what you don't want.... he's with YOU now, not her. She's an ex for a reason. I wouldn't let that bother you, insecurity is not hot. If they were hung up inside the closet thats one thing, but stocked away in a shoebox is normal and OK.
2006-11-10 12:51:16 · answer #2 · answered by HE'S NOT INTO ME 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Just because he may have fond memories of he and his ex-wife, that does not mean he cares any less for you. At the time when he was married, he probably cherished many things he shared with her. Although that relationship has ended, there is no reason why he should not cherish the memory of those times he shared. But those memories are his past, you are his present. So start making memories that he will cherish with you.
Don't try to compete with his past, enjoy the present together. Maybe that will help you two secure a future.
2006-11-10 12:53:18 · answer #3 · answered by zax_fl 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
To be fair this part of his life was obciously a big part of his life so let him have he's memories.... Just for now!
Given time i am sure he will dispose of them. The last thing you want to do is pressure him to get rid of them and cause a rift betwen you both....Try to be understanding and he will come round alot more quickly if you do! There was obviously alot of history there as he married her. People deal with things in different ways maybe he is trying to hang on to some happy memories(The photos)
Try to consider how it would be the other way round!
And most of all try to keep smiling x
2006-11-10 12:54:37 · answer #4 · answered by Updowndizzy 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
and? me and my ex are divorced and have each other's names tattooed on each other...both tats are on my back and one is on his arm and the other on his chest...we got them bc they had meaning (plus one has meaning bc our daughter's name is on it too) and neither have decided to remove them yet bc they did have meaning and to an extent still do...do either of us want to be together? no not really but they did symbolize a part of our lives to which each was an important part. can I blame someone I am dating for disliking it? no, but they have the choice to move on if they can't handle that...this issue isnt so much to do with the picture im sure but more that you are insecure and you need to get over that and quick. confidence is something that is appreciated and attractive to a mate whereas insecurity is something that will make you go crazy with doubt and will also drive the one you love away...
2006-11-10 12:45:01 · answer #5 · answered by serenity113001 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
if they are up on the wall I would be pissed, but if they are in a box, that is part of his history,, I am still pissed that my first wife made me cut up and destroy all my college pictures, then we got divorced after 10 years,, so I have no history anymore,
let it go, they stay boxed,
2006-11-10 13:53:47 · answer #6 · answered by rich2481 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
from a girl's point of view, like Juaquin said if he's not displaying them, don't worry about it. just because i hate my mom, i'm not gonna throw out every childhood picture i have ever had.
at least he did have the foresight to remove them. my husband, left his ex's picture out and kept her underwear until i said something. then he went through all his stuff and got rid of everything of hers. well.....the pictures are still there in the computer. but at least he isn't using it as his screensaver.
2006-11-10 12:57:14 · answer #7 · answered by Bella 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Who cares. My wife still has lots of pictures of her X. I certainly wouldn't expect her to get rid of a big part of her life. It sounds like you have security issues to me.
2006-11-10 12:50:01 · answer #8 · answered by MrNiceGuy 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
As long as he doesn't pull them out and display them - what is the problem? Those pictures represent a part of his life. You have to remember that not all the times he had with his ex were bad. Grow up.
2006-11-10 12:46:38 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
My husband still has pictures of his old girlfriends.
I do not want to erase his memories. What he did before me is his business. I still have photos of old boyfriends in my photo albums from those years. We both accept it and it is no big deal.
Do not dwell on crap that is in the past !
2006-11-10 13:18:41 · answer #10 · answered by Kitty 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋