Okay need relationship help,sister is with an idiot...? please read details?

Question

My sister has been slapped (once) hes lied to her, i think hes cheated on her also. Shes in love. Wants him to come over for thanksgiving. I told her it would be suicide for him. Live about hour away. Anywho is it true the more i tell her i h8 him the stronger their bond will be? Am i just going to have to deal with it? im worried about catching a murder charge if i see this guy. im twice his size. shes 30 hes 27 like me. H has a good job a house and all.So he doesnt live of her. She wants me to repect her decision. What should i do?

shes is an idiot too and hits him. forgot to add that. but no man needs to hit a girl. we can over power so they cant swing. I will just tell her im there for her. and when i see him , well i guess well have to se about that on thursday

Answer 1

invite him for dinner then poison him

Answer 2

You can't make decisions for her. But you can get information on spousal abuse and give it to her. Read it first so you understand more about it. And tell her to call you and you will get her out if she ever needs to escape.

I would invite him over. Watch how he treats her. Does she seem intimidated? Pull the jerk to the side and tell him that if he ever hits your sister again you will be after him. I don't know if this will help but it may make him think twice next time. Maybe he'll find a new girlfriend without a protector.

I've met women in this position and I just can't understand it. The only thing I can figure out is that it is a self-esteem thing...they don't think they are worthy of better treatment. I've taken women to the hospital unsure if they will live then see them again in several months with the same jerk.

I'd definately tell her what you think but emphasize that you will be there if she needs you. Then call 911 whether she wants you to or not. Don't beat the crap out of him....do it legally so you can still be there to protect her.

I'm sorry. I know how hard this is to see happening. And impossible to understand.

Answer 3

If the dinner is in your home, then you can let her know that the guy is not welcome there. If it is not in your home, there is not much you can do about whether he comes to dinner, other than to choose for you to not be there. It is all fine and dandy that she would like him to come have dinner with your family. She needs to stop and think about what kind of situation that would create for everyone if he were there. Maybe you could talk to her rationally about that and she could understand that it would likely get ugly based on this guy's past treatment of her.

Please try to remain supportive of your sister and provide her with information on domestic abuse. She needs to get out of that relationship before he does permanent damage to her physically and the sooner, the better.

If you do wind up at the same place for Thanksgiving, stay as far away from him as possible. Go outside and cool down, leave the room, whatever it takes. I think he will get the point that he is not welcome there. Don't create a big scene and do everything possible to see that there isn't one created, especially if there are going to be children present.

Answer 4

This may be hard but sometimes when you try to tell your family member that they need to leave their bf/gf alone, it makes them want to stay with them. I don't know why that may be but the only thing that I can tell you is to just let her know that if she should ever need you, that she can always talk to you. But if he already slapped her once, he'll do it again, and that is no lie! It may start off as one slap and then one punch but it will get worse. If she doesn't want to leave him, just keep an eye on him because he is treating her like she is his property. Make your sister see things from YOUR eyes because she is not in love, she is in denial and she doesn't want to lose him but he is going to do her more harm if she doesn't get help fast!! I wish you all the luck and I hope she listens to you and comes to her senses!!

Answer 5

Okay yeah with you hating him you are pushing them closer together. I know this from experiences You can calmly tell her what you are feeling and then if she tells you that she does not want to here it then you have to back away. You can also go to the police in his area and ask what they can do about the slapping.

Answer 6

it is purely suitable and precisely on element. i these days had a verbal substitute with this guy who in no way misses a guess to coach me onto Christianity. and that i stumbled on the quantity one million for myself. i ultimately have been given bored stiff with this Jesus talk and asked him if he understand the way all of it have been given started. He did no longer. So, I advised him. He started screaming at me how none of it grew to become into prepare, no longer purely like the perfect Being whose existence of direction have been shown previous any doubt! i think of those religious fundamentalists are with out cognitive reasoning.

Answer 7

knock the **** out of him after you lock your sister in a room...then call the cops and tell them he was trespassing on private property and the reason you hit him was cuz you were trying to protect your sister....then when the dust settles, explain to your sister that she shouldn't allow herself to be **** on by guys like that just so she can have a guy with a house and job (not that those things are bad), but if a woman allows a guy to treat her like crap in exchange for financial security that's kinda like being a hooker..

Answer 8

As hard as it may be to do you need to respect her decision. Im sure that when she has had enough of his abusive ways she will leave him. At least give her the opportunity to see him for who he really is........let's just hope that she doesnt decide to have children with him

Answer 9

it doesnt matter how much she loves him, he needs to be sent to prison...she needs a new man and a new life!