I have two men in my life. I have my ex with whom I spent 25 years of ups and down's and had 5 kids, now grown although two live with me. I have the love of my life with whom I've lived with for nearly 3 years. I feel comfortable with my ex, he says that I will only ever be the one for him, and can share the concerns of the kids, etc, although he has never given me maintenance for the youngest who is still at college. With my partner I can never have that total bond with his children or mine and it's too late to have our own.
2006-11-10 03:24:26 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
It's not a matter of love or family. You can have both. You're ex- is your ex- for a reason I am sure. Yes, you have the bond of having children together, and that is permanent. But your marital relationship is over. Follow love. You love your new partner. Stay with him. So what if you can't have kids with him? You have a bond with him that is unique and different than the one with your ex-, but not any less important and strong. Just different.
2006-11-10 03:28:05 · answer #1 · answered by nottashygirl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you spent 25 yrs with your ex why did it finish?As you say you now have the love of your life stick with him.Is the ex only saying you are the only one for him because hes on his own .You have moved on this far dont go back.Your ex couldnt have cared that much when the youngest was growing up as he left you to finacially cope with no help from him.Leave him where he is in the past,you dont need kids to bond with a man,now that the children are grown up you have each other to enjoy the world is now your oyster open it and enjoy.
2006-11-10 03:52:36 · answer #2 · answered by candyfloss 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't choose the man you can live with, choose the man you can't bear to lose! That's the one you love, despite any difficulties. You say your partner is the love of your life, surely he is the one you want?? Or is being comfortable with your ex just easier? In which case, why did you separate? Families grow up and make their own lives leaving you alone so make sure you follow your heart and not "concern for the kids"!
2006-11-10 04:06:15 · answer #3 · answered by Pixxxie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a hard one, isn't it? Still, you kind of answer the question yourself when you say that your ex has never helped you with the youngest child - how invested IS he in the family if he can't be bothered to do that?
I'd stay with the man you describe as the love of your life. Your children are ready to be on their own, and you should be with someone you truly love instead of someone you just feel comfortable with.
2006-11-10 03:27:49 · answer #4 · answered by dingobluefoot 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing wrong with things they way they are now. If you want the youngest one's maintenance, take the ex to court, you'll get the money.
2006-11-10 03:40:09 · answer #5 · answered by Solstice 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
with your new partner you can have something way better a life of love and fun.. you can travel and explore and just be together...Do you really want to go back to diapers and 2 more years of worry...I would think you are at least mid to late 40's take the rest of your life and have fun with the Love of your Life
2006-11-10 03:27:33 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ooo thats kinda complicated..i feel sorry for your new husband wow. you should feel lucky that hes even sticking it out with you even when your all like this...confused and everything. i say that you do both. you have to, sure keep relationship with ur ex for the sake of the kids, but remember whos your lover in your life
2006-11-10 03:27:33 · answer #7 · answered by craigorous 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did you and the ex divorce/break up? Your children are adults now. You need to decide who makes you feel better, happier, treats you better. GOOD LUCK!
2006-11-10 03:39:05 · answer #8 · answered by Mimi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love. Your children will soon fly the nest.
2006-11-10 03:36:15 · answer #9 · answered by Jo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your kids are grown. You need to choose which man you are happiest with.
2006-11-10 03:26:39 · answer #10 · answered by JC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋