I am worried silly about giving birth. Is it normal to be this aprehensive? It will be my first baby, and I truly don't think I can do it - stupid I know, as I have no choice!
2006-11-10 00:48:31 · 45 answers · asked by K 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Aww bless - yes is it natural to feel frightened. However if you put it in perspective - millions of women give birth every day and not too many moan about it - most go on to do it time and time again so it cant be that bad can it. I have 2 children and can tell you that I was terrified of the first birth - believe me it isnt so bad. The fear of the unknown is what makes you scared. Imagine a very bad period pain and that is what a contraction is. Go with the gas and air and pethadine and you will sail through. My daughter gave birth 7 weeks ago and I was one of her birthing partners - she was just as scared as you and yet she did it just fine and now wants another . Good luck love and if you cant shake the fear have a little chat with your midwife about it and see if she cant help xx
2006-11-10 00:54:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hiya
I can understand your apprehension I was terrified about giving birth to both my girls ,it is a big event .Everybody is different I would suggest having a good chat to your mother as it seems that birthing is a bit hereditary and she will be the best person to advise and support you .Also make sure that your midwives are easily approached and caring and supportive to talk through your fears .Have you visited the hospital you plan to deliver your beautiful bundle into and made a birth plan of what you would like to happen ,on a personal note I would say that after having my first birth monitered and being given heaps of painkillers ,the second which was totally natural and in a pool was a far better experience for me and my baby. Most of all try not too worry too much it can be a wonderful experience and very empowering and just think after a few hours you will be able to see and love your baby ,and get your body back .Sending you lots of good wishes xxxxx
2006-11-10 00:59:29 · answer #2 · answered by pussin boots 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i was absolutely TERRIFIED!!! But i went to the parent craft classes and asked loads of questions. I was adamant i wasn't having an epidural (the thought of a needle in my back scared me more than the birth itself) but the midwife assured me that most women ended up with epidurals cos the underestimated the pain. Likewise, many women coped with the pain better then they thought they would and decided to go natural.
My labour was very long and painful, and after they broke my waters (to get things going) i actually went backwards from 6cm dilated to 4.5cm at that point and it didn't help at all cos i was monitored on a bed and i wasn't allowed to get off it!! I demanded an epidural at that point cos i couldn't cope any longer. I had gas and air as the epidural went in and i didn't even feel it!!!!! it was the best thing about the birth! I'd like to try a mobile epidural next time as you can turn it up or down to give more or less relief as needed.
Don't forget though, you are a mother now, you can do anything you need or want to do for your child. You are capable of giving birth else why would we be able to fall pregnant in the first place??? Be strong and make sure you watch LOADS of TV programmes beforehand. It may scare you a bit, but it WILL prepare you for whats going to happen! I had a hard and painful 18 hour labour but i am still willing to do it all over again!! (next July to be precise!!)
GOOD LUCK
X X X X X X X
2006-11-10 21:50:14 · answer #3 · answered by cuddlymummy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm 36 weeks pregnant with my first and scared stiff about the birth as well!!!.
The thing is, try not to listen to other people. Those who love to tell you their horror stories of their agonising and complicated 48 hour labours may THINK they are helping but they are NOT! Same goes for those who disagree with the choices you've made as to where to give birth, what pain releif to have etc and always ave some horrible story to scare you with and make you feel you're making the wrong decision. I've planned a waterbirth and the amount of people who get off on telling me "OMG you're mad not to have an epidural blah blah". Then again, you plan to go to hospital and have an epidural and you'll meet someone who had a bad experience with THAT and tell you to do it the "natural" way!!!!
You are an individual and your labour won't be the same as mine or anyone else's. you have to go with your gut instinct about what will make it easier for you to cope. Find out the FACTS (ante natal classes are good for this) about the stages of labour, what can happen, pain releif options, etc and make a choice based on what feels right FOR YOU not what your auntie told you or what someone on Yahoo answers says you "should" do. We are all different and one woman might feel so much better having an unmedicated home birth whilst another wouldn't be happy unless she was in hospital and doped up the the eyeballs with drugs! There is no blueprint for everyone to follow.
Talk to your doctor/midwife. They are really the only people whose advice and opinions you should be taking note of.
2006-11-10 07:50:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm 24 weeks pregnant with my 2nd daughter. Giving birth is fantastic and a fantastic experience. Your only scared because whatever we read or hear it always the not knowing. Speak to you midwife, she will discuss the birth in more detail with you if this is what you want. If your still unhappy I had a great book that shows graphic pictures but at least it gives you more of an idea rather than someone trying to explain in words, Its by Dr Miriam Stoppard, Its called New Pregnancy and birth book. You will be fine, try not not to be scared, thousands of women are giving birth every day and if it really was that bad people wouldn't keep having babies.
Good luck xx
2006-11-10 02:32:20 · answer #5 · answered by SARAH S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is so normal. I just had my son 13 weeks ago today and I can tell you as the days went by I got more nervous and my dreams proved it. As we give birth we worry that we will not be able to do it and then we worry if something goes wrong with the baby but funny I did not worry so much if something happened to me. Just breath and realize that your female instincts will kick in and you will do a great job. Just believe in yourself and know that when it is all over with you will have the best present you could ever ask for. Congrats on the baby.
2006-11-10 02:06:06 · answer #6 · answered by mytessa77 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi, Congratulations on your baby! Fear of delivery is very normal. Everwhere you go people share their horror stories," I was in labor for 3 days." THANKS ALOT! No wonder we are scared to death. Giving birth is an amazing thing that only we women do, AND as you know many women do give birth more than once. Thats the wonderful thing about it. At the end of this 9 months you finally get to see your baby and hold them and in a while you forget about all the fear and remember the joy of the baby. I personally believe that at the end of the pregnancy you are so big and uncomfortable that you will be sooooo ready to have this baby you will be saying , " I just want this baby to get here!" That's just my feeling and I've had two children. Just remember the Dr. and nurses are there to help. Get your epidural as soon as possible{ this is truely God's gift to women} and think about the beautiful baby you will be holding at the end of your labor. Best of wishes, and don't worry to much. Try to enjoy this special time in your life. Rv
2006-11-10 01:30:52 · answer #7 · answered by rosemary H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are SO not alone in feeling this way about giving birth for the first time. You have reached out to this community for answers & I'm sure you will find many supportive responses. Keep asking for the support to get you thru the scary feelings. Talk to your doctor about your anxiety. Be explicit - explain all your feelings. Your doctor needs this information in order to help you thru the birth the best way he/she can. Discuss all the pain relieving options. I believe knowledge gives you a feeling of control. When you feel in control & you know how to go forward it isn't as scary. And if you are still scared let people know you need them. It's ok to ask for help & it's ok to accept it. Maybe concentrate on meeting the little "present" you have been waiting for, for so long. Also, the reality of giving birth is this: it hurts but, the pain ends & you have the most amazing feelings inside of you while holding this new life! Best wishes for a happy & healthy baby! Congratulations!
2006-11-10 01:22:36 · answer #8 · answered by curiousgeorge 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try (and I know it's hard) not to get worked up about it. I have found with birth and with many things in life that the anticipation is MUCH WORSE than the actual event. I can promise you, you will say the same thing once you are holding your precious baby! If you can't get it out of your head that you are going to have a horribly painful birth, then you will absolutely create that. Try to change your thinking to more positive things and remember that your body is designed to have babies...giving birth is completely natural and normal. You can do it...give yourself a pep talk. Tell yourself that millions women that aren't nearly as strong as you have done it, so you can too.
2006-11-10 01:09:03 · answer #9 · answered by єЖтяα ¢яιѕρψ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its totally normal! dont worry you will be ok im 29 weeks on baby number 2 and im a bit aprehensive too but i know i get to see my baby at the end of it! just try not to let the worry rule you your birth may not be that bad ! a woman give birth up a tree in the tsunami and millions and millions of women have done it so it cant be that bad good luck xx
2006-11-10 00:54:07 · answer #10 · answered by mummy of 2 boys and a princess x 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋