you can't get the image of them together out of your head and every time you think of them together you can't breath and you cry uncontrollaby. and you can feel you heart breaking more and more each time.
2006-11-09 19:30:23 · 22 answers · asked by tippy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Tippy, the only way you are going to be able to deal with this is to forget it. When you start remembering, stop. Imagine something brings a smile to your face. It's not wrong to stay with a man that you love, even if he's cheated. But honey, it's your mental health that is taking the punishment. You are going to have to forgive and forget to make it. It's not easy and it's not going to happen over night. I am sorry, your heart breaking is got to stop before it completly breaks.
Does your husband help you? What I mean has he ask for forgiveness? Does he show you emotional support? Honey, you need for him to help you with this. Believe it or not, you need him to help heal from this wound. He needs to be more loving, and shows that he cares that he hurt you. If he's just blowing it off, like it happen-get over it-then you may never be able to fully forgive him and stop the tears. He's the kleenex, he's the one that needs to wipe them away with his love.
Honey, you must remove the images, clean out all the thoughts of them together. You are grieving in a sense, you have been betrayed, and it's like part of you has died. It hurts, and it's so hard, but it can be done. If you want to save your marriage, you are going to have too! Your husband may have be so wrong, but now it's your turn to make sure you don't make it worse. If you feel the tears coming on-focus on something else. Anything, but that. When you start, or catch yourself thinking remember this...it's in the past and today's a new day, each day it will get less and less. Your husband has got to do his part sweetie. You can't make a marriage by yourself, No matter how much you love him, unless you are going to be a silent wife, and just let him do what he wants when he wants. You deserve so much more than that. You deserve to be loved and respected, it's your choice your decision rather to forgive, and if this is what you want to do, you must not dwell on it any longer. Kick yourself in the butt, if you have too. I am so very sorry, no one should have their heart broken like this, but you aren't alone, and many marriages have become stronger from living thru what you are going through right now. So, please dry those tears, take a deep breath, and remember it's all your choice how you deal with it.
Praying that your heart mends, and the memories are forgotten, and that you have the strength to know you are worth true love and respect from the one you GAVE your heart to.
God bless us all............
2006-11-10 12:44:26 · answer #1 · answered by totallylost 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u are going to keep thinking about it day in, day out, 24/7 and cry uncontrollably each time the images of them together comes to mind then it's just not worth it. It would just be better for u to move on. I know that's easier said than done but do u honestly want to be with him and keep brooding about what he did? Think about it. You'll never have peace of mind.
2006-11-10 03:48:30 · answer #2 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No nothing is wrong in this situation...you stay because that is your choice for your reasons and you need to see a counselor together...you need to put some things into place to help you control your emotions and start the healing process.... A friend of mine once said it's better to heal and forgive with the wound open...
Mind you time out for you time away to think and preferably with fun friends to keep you happy wouldn't hurt you either...
2006-11-10 03:35:27 · answer #3 · answered by lol_des 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
All it will be is an endless cycle. Yeah maybe he will or will not cheat again, but once that image is burned into your hear it stays there. The best thing to do is leave. I put up with it for a while then I met someone else.
2006-11-10 04:05:41 · answer #4 · answered by ProudToBeWhite 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Leave. This is a health risk aswell as heartbreaking. It sounds as if you have a few self esteem issues. I put up with loads of crap from a man for 4 years as I convieniently thought of the good times, it is like editing out the crap, but one day the realisation will hit you. When you where little and you envisioned your life in future, was it with somebody like this who treated you like dirt?? life is too short, as I found out. Do not waste any more time. There are others that will love you and you will love, even though you dont believe it now. I found somebody who is perfect and I love and he loves me. I t will happen. ditch this man now. xxx
email me if you need advice. xxx
2006-11-10 03:57:32 · answer #5 · answered by Abigail 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's only wrong if you think it is. If you are perfectly content to tie yourself to a guy that won't keep his pants zipped when you're not around then I wish you the best. Please also realize that it's not just "cheating"... he's possibly putting you at risk of contracting an STD.
If you're asking the question, then some part of you must be questioning the value of the relationship. I wrote in another post that we are treated only as badly as we allow ourselves to be treated. HOW DO YOU WANT TO BE TREATED?
2006-11-10 03:35:08 · answer #6 · answered by anon 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OMG
Move on. We all have people in our life that we love but can't or shouldn't be with.
You are basing your own idenity on this guy.
What part of your self esteem thinks it is ok for him to get by with this?
This might be news- but self sacrificing your own spirit and soul isn't love.
He has broken your heart....and you keep it from being mended.
Make a choice for happiness. Take good care of you.
2006-11-10 03:35:26 · answer #7 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
the way you wrote this sounds as if your terribly crushed. I can understand because I've seen it... you know, you gotta know what kind of person this guy is. HE CHEATED ON YOU! that is lacking honesty, it shows what kind of guy he is. A guy like that is not worth your time, your only hurting yourself. Try not to be dependant, remember lover yourself so you can love others. There are plenty of guys who arent ****ers like this guy. Move on. I wish you the best of luck.
2006-11-10 03:33:29 · answer #8 · answered by xyz00192 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
please get rid of him- before he ends up breaking you down more or even giving you a std. you deserve better than this. there is someone out there ready to love you- go find him and forget about this guy!! ive been where you are and you think you love him, however, as soon as you get rid of him- you will look back and thank god your out of the heartache. i promise it does get better. focus on yourself, and you will never put up with this treatment ever again. you will find someone that will love you the way you love them!! good luck and best wishes- remember you deserve better
2006-11-10 03:47:57 · answer #9 · answered by sweetthang 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your being foolish he will continue to treat you this way leave while you can do you want a pregnancy then your screwed with a kid and a two timing pig he sounds like a jerk and a player?
2006-11-10 03:32:57 · answer #10 · answered by Livinrawguy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋