How can I save my marriage?

Question

Throughout our relationship and our marriage I was very stubborn and lazy. I also refused to compromise. Over time, my husband gave up and began acting the same way and he ended up leaving me. We have talked since but he refuses to come over fearing that I have not changed and I am going to be the same negative person I was before. How can I show him that I have changed when he won't even let me see him? It's getting to the point where he will barely answer my phone calls.....

Answer 1

NEVER BEG..How long where u two together? .okay if you where a way for a long period of time then just saying and wanting isn't gonna get you any where but wondering why he doesn't want me attitude...Are u still married did he file for divorce yet...if so honey sorry but you waited to long to realize what you lost....if not you still can compromise if he wont give you one last chance to talk then all you have left is gonna be one letter.....(you have to stick to this) but you need to ask yourself how much is he worth if it doesn't work you are gonna have to let him go unless you want him hatting you if it was meant to be you may get him back later in life if you can keep up a more positive person....either letter or in person try this tell him that he is worth changing for and if you give me a time frame let me show you if you still have any feelings for me you would give me this chance...If not we can go our separate ways .....

Answer 2

You should really have thought about that when you were together. If the two people in the relationship ain't prepare to compromise or come to some mutual agreement, there's just no point. You say you were stubborn, does that also mean you wouldn't listern to what your husband was telling you, even thought he might have been right. Your husband probably believes he would be banging his head against a brick wall he if you got together again. If he's refusing to talk to you, I really don't know how you can convince him. You should have done the talking and the listerning when you were together. You may be better moving on, and learn from this experience.

Answer 3

You do not have to "teach" her as though she is a puppy!!! to begin with, your present concern have got to me the end result of some thing... what has been taking place among you 2?? have not you attempted to do not forget that she have got to be even much less convinced than you're?? you're considering virtually "fingering" and stuff like that once might be the supply of the predicament is verbal exchange?, empathy? and know-how??? whatever else Beyond the mere sexual act? And do not even attempt to take this concern as an excuse and cheat to your spouse now!! That could very egocentric or even immature for a person of your age... Try to concentrate what she has to mention and DON'T JUDGE her of getting conventional ideas... im certain there may be plenty to save lots of in on your marriage, much more after 22 years!!!!! Good success and sorry If I spoke strongly however guys oftentimes are so inconsiderate....

Answer 4

I hate to be the bearer of BAD NEWS but ....
You need, I take that back, YOU MUST move on! Let him call you. You may have had a crappy marriage but maybe you can salvage the friendship!? If you hound him (if it was him after you it would be called harassment) you will only push him further away. Let the dust settle and lick your wounds. Give yourself time to heal and thank god you learned something from that marriage. Everyone has something to teach us and it is hard to leave a positive teacher! If your relationship has any chance it won't come from chasing him and trying to prove you are NEW AND IMPROVED person(sounds like a detergent ad lol). Seriously, suck it up be strong, and have self pride that you are better person because of him.

Go ahead! Walk down that street WITH YOUR HEAD UP KNOWING YOU ARE NEW AND IMPROVED!

Don't u think u are a better catch now?

Answer 5

This is always a hard thing to get through.First you should stop calling him.Clean up your act and your place.Get your hair done different than it was when you where together.Spend some money and time with your self.Ask your self am I better with him or without.Which ever way you answer you should follow your heart.If you feel better with him and you have taken care of your self(hair nails etc)go where you know he goes and kind of bump into him.You can tell looking at him if he is still interested in you.Follow your heart.It may get broken,but at least you tried and know where his heart is at.GOOD LUCK and I hope you find your true love.

Answer 6

Well I would say change comes from the inside and radiates out kinda like um welll... the holy spirit who changes you from the inside and you become a new person. You wanna see dramatic change? Seek Jesus! I have heard testimony after testimony of how God personally changed people. A satanist priest, A adulterous man, A fifteen year old athies. I know all these people personally if you want to meet them they are in Chrisitan Chat 3 in Yahoo.

Answer 7

I'm sorry to say this, but your marriage is over! You really need to learn from your mistake and move on and NEVER let that get in the way of other relationships. Maybe if you stop calling him and let him think about things he will come back. Maybe you calling him like that is to over powering and he does not want that. You really have to step back and let him work it out and if you lose him you will just have to learn.

Answer 8

I'm impressed that you have the courage and insight to evaluate your part in the breakup. This in and of itself demonstrates such maturity and willingess to improve yourself.

From his perspective it is understandable that he is fearful of getting back into old habits that were negative for him. Continue to walk the talk, let your daily actions be the proof. He may or may not notice but either way... you are a new and improved person. If its not him, someone will benefit from this gift.

Good luck to you and your husband.

Answer 9

Marriage takes two and like a job, laziness and a bad attitude will only get you fired.

It's hard for people to believe someone can just change overnight and maybe you are trying to hard to get him to come back. Stop calling and make him wonder what you are up too.

Answer 10

I do believe actions speak louder then words if you show your husband that maybe you have a job your home is neat and tidy and that you are talking care of yourself he may realize hey she is trying and doing a pretty good job but saying you have changed and doing something to change your old ways are two different things. Good Luck and God Bless.