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I wish you knew this other ride
Travels to a different side
Where everything just seems to be slowing
But the miles just keep on rolling
The road fades midnight black and blue
But chances are you have no clue

Most come here to post
Others to just get lost
To disappear
And then reappear
With clearer thoughts in pursue
But chances are you have no clue

I’m back on this road again
Allied with my very best friend
Penciling all the things I lack
And all the things I got right on track
All my missed chances
All those so close dances
And how those dreamy dreams almost came true
But chances you have no clue

2006-11-09 18:02:03 · 8 answers · asked by Ct_noicS 1 in Arts & Humanities Books & Authors

8 answers

Lovely poem....so, if I were you, before I think of publishing this or anything, I'D DELETE THIS POEM FROM YAHOO ....you never know, someone might copy this poem of yours and publish it and you'd have to legal rights to claim it as yours!!

2006-11-09 20:47:02 · answer #1 · answered by J.Welkin 1 · 0 0

I'm not fond of it because it allienates the reader with the use of the second preson "You".

I prefer the Dead:

If my words did glow with the gold of sunshine
And my tunes were played on the harp unstrung,
Would you hear my voice come thru the music,
Would you hold it near as it were your own?

It's a hand-me-down, the thoughts are broken,
Perhaps they're better left unsung.
I don't know, don't really care
Let there be songs to fill the air.

Ripple in still water,
When there is no pebble tossed,
Nor wind to blow.

Reach out your hand if your cup be empty,
If your cup is full may it be again,
Let it be known there is a fountain,
That was not made by the hands of men.

There is a road, no simple highway,
Between the dawn and the dark of night,
And if you go no one may follow,
That path is for your steps alone.

Ripple in still water,
When there is no pebble tossed,
Nor wind to blow.

But if you fall you fall alone,
If you should stand then who's to guide you?
If I knew the way I would take you home.

Here the "You" seems more inclusionary, less confrontational.

2006-11-10 02:09:46 · answer #2 · answered by Rico Toasterman JPA 7 · 0 0

I think it is exquisite and feeling. It sounds to me like you are desperatly trying to show someone something and he is not picking up on any of the cles at all. As if this person won't notice you or your pain. You are very intelligent, I just hope I was intelligent enough to guess what the meaning of the poem correctly

2006-11-10 02:16:16 · answer #3 · answered by ContessaVampira 3 · 0 0

Well 3 b frank it is really not so good. but dont take it 2 ur heart pal.

2006-11-10 04:23:34 · answer #4 · answered by theallknowingguy 2 · 0 0

Good. Go ahead poet.

2006-11-10 04:22:23 · answer #5 · answered by Rohini karthikeyan 3 · 0 0

Hey, it's pretty good. I liked it. Really.

2006-11-10 04:43:14 · answer #6 · answered by Josh 1 · 0 0

your poem is very beautiful .send your poems for me.
poorya_momtazfar@yahoo.com

2006-11-10 02:12:50 · answer #7 · answered by poorya_momtazfar 1 · 0 0

NICE ONE DUDE.

2006-11-10 02:14:04 · answer #8 · answered by AMIT G 3 · 0 0

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