What should I do when my kids visit my ex?

Question

I hate when my ex takes my kids for his visitations, I end up sitting at home waiting for them to come home again! I have no new partner in my life, and my friends are all married - I feel like a bit of a charity case if I go visit them all the time! I have very little money, so can't afford to go spoil myself with hair treatments or shopping etc, but hate it that I count down the time the kids are away from me. I have not been a single mum for all that long, maybe it gets easier with time?

Answer 1

Right now you are feeling lonely and vulnerable. As more time passes and you meet new friends this will become less of an issue. There is probably at little worry too since you are afraid that maybe your children will prefer spending time with their father than with you. Children are able to adapt to two homes and you will also feel better with the situation. You are grieving the loss of a family unit and a relationship and you should try and be gentler with yourself. Go for a walk while your kids are gone, have a long leisurely bath and read a great book. There are ways to pamper and reward ourselves without spending a great deal of money. Don't worry you will be ok and look back at this time as a learning experience. Good luck to you.

Answer 2

When my son used to go and visit his dad and I found myself all alone I would do things that I didn't have time for when my son was with me. I would pamper myself with a long hot bath, try different styles with my hair, do my nails, etc. I also picked up the hobby of making jewelry and would create beautiful necklaces. I found I could concentrate better. You could also read a book or watch a gushy movie. Do whatever it is that makes you happy, you don't need a man in your life to entertain yourself. Look at it this way, if you felt like walking around naked in your house you can do that when the kids aren't there, right?

Answer 3

HI!

Save during the week so you can go to a movie or to the mall and have lunch and just walk around. Go to the Library and check out some books. Start doing some crafts at home and make gifts for others, sell Avon, do something for you. THis is hard, but you can overcome it and need things for you. Good Luck

Answer 4

Good suggestions.. already by so many.

Relax, take a warm bath, paint your nails, join a volunteer group, go to the library and rent movies, do some projects around the house that you cannot get to on a regular day.
Do your grocery shopping, catch up with friends and family, go for walks
and most of all
CATCH UP WITH SLEEP

There is so much you can do..

Answer 5

I hate to tell you this but it's part of divorce and unless you can prove your ex is an unfit father you cant take his parental rights. I think you need to enjoy the time your ex takes your kids to go out and live a little maybe even find somone new! GOod luck!

Answer 6

You are in a position that millions of women would love to be in...time alone and time to refresh. Take advantage of that time and ask yourself what you want to do. Maybe take some college classes or take up a hobby that you've always wanted to try. How about volunteering at a hospital or hospice?

See, that's the beauty of it...you can do what ever it is that you want to do!

Answer 7

Use this time to get things done that you don't usually have time for such as deep cleaning, sorting wardrobes, paint a room!
Relax with scrapbooking, take some bubble baths!
Take advantage of this time!! Get together with friends..I could go on and on!!

Answer 8

Start going to school, start a workout routine. Get back to yourself and improve yourself while you have the chance. Take advantage and meet some new people in whatever you start doing.

Answer 9

You sound like a great mom! My son is 8yrs old and the other is 5yrs old and I don't go anywhere when my kids are gone. Maybe to the grocery store.