I chat to my neices friend. Am i doing something wrong?

Question

I'm 20. My neice is 14.
My neices best friend is also 14. I've known this girl for 2 years and see her almost everytime i visit my sister.
A couple of weeks ago, my neices friend added me to her msn.
My neice likes to have group discussions through msn and when that happens her friend and i usually team up and just make jokes about the other people. Nothing too mean, just stupid little kid stuff that i would just play along with.
The other day i was talking to her on msn, about one of our recent group discussions. Nothing out of the ordinary was said, just recaping old jokes and making new ones.
Then a couple of days later my sister tells me that the girls mum is angry at me for apparently sending "innapropriate" and "stupid" messages. To me it sounded as if her mum thought i liked her daughter, and that i was trying to hit on her or something. Which is not true. I'm not a Pedophile. I was just making jokes. Is that wrong? Am i wrong to be chating with me nieces 14yo friend?

Since that day. My neices friend has not spoken to me on msn. And when i see here at my sisters house, there is no more joking. Just maybe a hello. No eye contact. Thats the same with her mum. I dont know what her mum could have thought, but it is now REALLY unconfurtable when i see them. She cant be this angry over jokes, can she? She has to have gotten the wrong idea. How do i explain to her that i'm not like that, and that it was just joking around? I feel as if though i have done somethig wrong, when i know that i haven't.

yumcup,
Its not like i go on msn to talk to my neices friends. I'm on msn, they add me to the convo, and i just chit chat while i do whatever else i may be doing on the computer at the time.
She is always the one to start the convo, unless she talks to me first, i dont talk to her

Answer 1

umm no its not wrong til you make it wrong! you are the adult and she the "child" keep it friendly and clean! but then again were not that girls mother!

Answer 2

It all depends on what you was joking about.You should of included your silly jokes in your question.Her mother and a good lawyer can get into the computer and get all those messages you sent to that girl and twist and turn the messages so much that they can make you look like a pedophile.It may have been innocent but learn and move on.No more chatting with any girl under age other then your niece.That means no more group chats.Play safe.

Answer 3

It sounds as if what you did was innocent, but mothers get very protective of their daughters, and the fact you didn't ask her permission probably looks as if you were "sneaking around" behind her back.

I feel for you, because I have a 14 year old friend that I sometimes chat to on e-mail as well as in RL. I am REALLY careful about what I say to him, and 99% of the time I talk to him only with one of his parents or another adult with us. When I e-mail him, it is through his family's e-mail account so they can screen our e-mails. I would never think of chatting to him on msn, or even the phone.

It sucks that it has to be this way, but protecting the child has to come first. And being realistic, you have to consider what other people would think, not just what you know to be right.

Answer 4

According to what you said, it all sounds innocent to me. I don't really see that there is anything wrong with it. Especially when you've known her for a while and it's your niece's friend. It's not like you were hitting on her or talking in a sexual manner. If you were, I would say there is everything wrong with that. If you want advice, if it makes the mother uncomfortable, I would just stop for a while or maybe just cool the subject down to simple stuff. That's what I would do.

Answer 5

You have to admit, it looks bad. Maybe she is over-reacting... maybe she isn't, as you haven't told us what was said. But hey, none of our business eh. Just try not to cross the line with her. If you feel that a joke, conversation, or whatever is getting too sexual or the friendship starting to turn, walk away. I wouldn't expect jail to be much fun. Best of luck

Answer 6

Don't worry about it. If there is nothing going on then what do you have to worry about? Just don't get too personal with the little girl. If her mother doesn't want you chatting with her daughter anymore then take heed to that. Respect her wishes.

Answer 7

No, you're not wrong. It's just that other stupid people in this world have ruined it for everyone else. My grandfather met my grandmother when he was 23 and she was 14. That shows you how much times have changed.

Answer 8

This is your niece's friend's mom. I KNOW what you did.

Stay away from my daugher named (my daughter's name here). I know that you have a thing for (her name again). I don't care what (you probably think I don't actually know her name) says; YOU TOUCHED HER. If I see you with (you're right, I really don't know her name) again, I swear, I'm going to KILL you. (Because I'm not really her mom) is hurt because of this, and it's YOUR fault. I really don't appreciate what you did to (or as you would say, "mum") and it's going to stop. (Bye) says bye.

"Shut up, (this joke is getting old)!"

"No, (okay, I'm really leaving now), you're not the boss of me!"

"(What if no one actually gets this joke to begin with?), I'm not kidding!"

Okay. I'm back. But I swear - if you touch little (I'm leaving now, this is really it), I will have you HUNG.

(It's "hanged," not hung) says bye again. Okay, bye.

...

(Bye.)

Answer 9

This stupid law has got to be rethunk me think.
It is getting to the puint where you cant even open your mouth if somone in the area is under age

Answer 10

Hell No!! but her Mom sucks (only if you didnt do anything seriously offending). Stop doing alot of chat with that girl because parents can be unreasonable and dangerous.
Hope you dont get into trouble. GOD BLESS!!

Answer 11

no u r not wrong maybe the girl momma got issues and dont like her being friends with 20 year olds