I feel always the "need Tobe perfect" How can I change.?

Question

I have learned this week I need to be human to help others. I always feel the need to be perfect and at times I care about the opinions of others, what can I do to have a godly self esteem and not "try so hard" or always feel the need to "explain myself".
I realize I can live this way but how can I let go and let God?

Answer 1

"Out of sight, out of mind" ring sooo true. Keep the verese that tell you that you ar unique, and predestined to be conformed in the image of Christ and the scriptures that tell you what God says about you. We're only human- look more at your PROGRESS and not PERFECTION. There was only ONE perfect person on this planet'but, working towards your desired goal means that you have faith. We can't do it alone, but what we can do, we need to- God handles everything else!

Answer 2

A lot of people don't realize that they "need to be perfect" and that is their greatest fault. It is good that have recognized this because it can get on the nerve of some people quite easily. First you have to realize and accept the idea that perfection in any form does not exist. If you do not believe this, I challenge you to find one thing that is perfect (with the possible exception of God). There was a question on a latin test that I took today that relates directly to this: we had to translate the phrase "errare humanum est" to error is human (there are probably many versions of this quote). If you have done extreamly well on a project but you feel that one little thing is wrong say to yourself that it's okay, nothing is perfect and don't waste time trying to make things that way. Also don't punish yourself because you got one little thing wrong on something, no one else will think anything of it and neither should you.

Answer 3

The first thing in facing a problem is admitting you have a problem. And you obviously arn't perfect because your name is Tobe. Sorry, just my sense of humor.

Your internal dialog is bogging you down. Your perception of what makes you you is perfection in external -obvious things.

Change your internal self talk. Do the best you can. Accept yourself for what you are.

Realize that everything that goes through your brain needs to be heard or explained. How to learn this?? Change your thought patterns. Stop pleasing others and be yourself.

You used the statement Let go and let God. That is an alanon saying. Alanon saved me from myself. Get some books or go to meetings.

Answer 4

Sometimes flat out, "no" is the only thing *to* say. But if you feel like that is more nagging, try saying "Let's play with this" or "Oh look at this really neat _________". Distraction can be a mommy's best friend :) Especially when Mommy is trying to cook or do something important and the baby goes for the trash can or one of mommy's pretty breakables! You could even try finding an older remote and remove the batteries for her to play with. Or even an old keyboard to tap on, or an old cell phone that you don't use any more. I had to get creative as my kids got older!

Answer 5

The problem isn't even as far as God. The problem lies in your question "how can I change?" the answer is simple. Stop feeling the need to change. You need to find a way to gather the self esteem and respect to NOT feel the need to change.

It's great advice that's hard to follow, believe me, I feel the same way as you a lot of the time. But you have to keep working at it.

Answer 6

To become wise means that you need to learn to brush aside many things. More often, the perfectionists ends up in street fights and do not ever reach the destination. What is important is the goal to be achieved. At the same time, for achieving the goal, you need to show some sense of purpose and a firmness. You have to strike a balance.

Answer 7

When did someone in your life made you feel imperfect early in life, as that is where your need to feel perfect is coming from, which is simply a need to be love perfectly, but then only you can do that for yourself as you know all your imperfection as you call them and still learn to embrace and love them as that is what make you special and unique in this whole wide universe.

Simply love all that you are, by embracing all that you are, we all need to be told that we are lovable and adorable just the way we are, and once we learn to do that for ourselves we are free to be who God made us to be - our Self.

That is called, perfecting ourselves with love as the more you love yourself the more perfect your life will be and more the presence of God or love will you feel in your life, it is all in our hands ultimately, as no one else can love ourselves the way we can or God does, and he love us just the way He made us, perfect with all our so called imperfection as those our learning lessons for this life, to accept all the imperfections in our life, and our body and mind so that we can transcend our fate and reach our destiny.

Answer 8

Be true to what makes you happy. we cannot help others if we do not help ourselves first. We cannot offer support if we are not strong enough or know ourselves well enough.
God, Buddha, Krishna etc. will love you if you enjoy your life for the precious gift that it is.
Your conception was one in a million possibilties - you were meant to be here, now. Just being here and living a good life without harming yourself, others or the Earth is as perfect as can be.

Answer 9

You were created by God. Perfection can only create perfection. Therefore, you already are perfect. So you don't need to worry about something you already are.

That does not mean you should not strive to improve or do your best. It means that you do the best you know how, and do something different when you have a better idea of how to do it.

Answer 10

Perfection is a illusion. It doesn't exist. If you where perfect, I don't think you'd like living on earth. We're all a bunch of screw ups, but we keep trying anyway. And above all, have a good laugh, at least once a day.