My boyfriend needed $2000.00 bux for a down payment for a nice house he bought for my kids and i BUT he couldn't come up with the money so i used my clear van title and lost my van.
I have 3 children that need to get to school, doctor, dentest, and haul all their friends around in too.
which i can't do now. I do use my boyfriends car but he yells at me about the gas, dirty car, and how the kids eat in it. I say well if i had my van all would be well.
The real problem is:
my soon to be exhusband is willing to pick up our son and take him to school drop him back off at home no problems.
Boyfriend HATES this and thinks ex is only doing it to lust after me which i have been over ex for 5 yrs am NOT in love with him nor want him in any WAY!!!
BF says IF i let him drive the child then he can keep getting drunk and buying beer with money we don't have THAT COULD GO TO 2nd car!!!
but he keeps going on about,.. he'll keep the beer if i keep the exhusband around
What do ya'll thi
2006-11-09 11:15:44 · 14 answers · asked by rdjclark@sbcglobal.net 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Well honey I dont know how old you are but with age you will learn. I love a man just like the next woman however I never put any man or one before my four kids, nor my self because with out me my children would not have a mother. theres no sense in dwelling over what you should've, could've, done with your van obvoiusly you shouldve keep it for your better good. People (men expecally) will do exactly what you allow them too you allowed this man to use you for your van for what so he can get a house? shouldnt he be buying you a house? For you and your kids aren't you a package deal, How did he think you you were going to be getting around with your Van? How did you think you were going to get around better yet?
NEVER EVER put your finances for you and your children over a man unless he has put a ring on your finger (perferablly 2 carrots) clothes on you & your childrens back, food in you and your childrens mouths, a roof over you head in both of your names (what happens if you break up) you have no car nor house?
As far as the Ex Husband I feel that he is the father and should very well be involved in his childrens life weather or not you BF thinks he wants you back because frankly if the BF was doing his job as a MAN to you and father figure to YOUR kids then the EX/childrens father wouldnt pose a threat after all you are with the so called BF. You dont have you van and it doesnt sound like the BF is going to by you a new one, So I feel you should let your childrens father step up and do what is right for HIS children.
The BF sound childish and obviously doesnt know how to buget his money. Hopefully hes also buying food for the kids when he picks up his beer. Did you at lease make some kind of payment arrangement to to van so that you can buy another vehicle? Promisary note? anything? that would have been the smart thing to do, cause theres really nothing to be done now that hes gotten you car taken away and he got your money, seems like you are SOOL (**** OUT OF LUCK) all you can do now is learn from you mistake...grow up, be a mother and move on.
2006-11-09 11:45:18 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first of all your ex has a right to see the kids! So whether you like it or not there is no way you can completely avoid your ex. I hope your bf understands this. I also think your bf has trust problems and his beer argument just looks like an excuse. He knows he has a problem as he just want to put the blame on someone else. From what you say this relationship really needs some work. Also when you said he bought the home for you and your kids I hope you have also signed the papers. Not something like he will add your name later on the papers. Because then that would be a big red flag.
2006-11-09 11:25:44 · answer #2 · answered by A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your boyfriend is a loser. Um, yeah, a big time loser. Sounds to me like he doesn't care about you or your kids, all he cares about is what he wants. I don't blame him though. I blame you for allowing him to put you into this situation. You should have waited till he had saved up enough money to buy the house instead of getting rid of your only means of transportation. I mean, would another couple of months of saving really been that bad? Why did you have to have the house that soon? Am I missing something? Well, I'm gonna tell you a saying that I've always gone by so you can take it or leave it.
" With patience, the outcome is always better"
2006-11-09 11:30:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, the first concern here is you said my boyfriend...that is a noun word I usually associate with a verb word---uncommitted. when you made the decision to sell your van did you deeply consider the consequences of no longer having personal transportation for yourself and your children? I believe now is the time to re-evaluate your relationship with your boyfriend. Your ex-husband is the father of your child and no one should try to prevent him from being apart of his son's life. your boyfriend should not present you with such a ridiculous choice; it's me or your child's father. If I personally had to make this decision hands down I would choose my child's father. If your boyfriend didn't have enought money to purchase the house---how do you think that he will be able to stop drinking now, and purchase a second vehicle for just you and your children?
2006-11-09 11:33:39 · answer #4 · answered by roddy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've only been with guy for a month. If he does move you in this soon, you'd better not unpack, because you'll be moving out as soon as Miss Right comes along. Better take the time to know this guy, before you start making plans. Having regular sex is not the same as developing a loving relationship.
2016-05-22 01:31:39 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why in the hell do you want a boyfriend like this????? He is using you for a free ride and abusing you and the kids.......what is wrong with this picture? You have no one to blame but yourself for not having a vehicle. Why in the hell would you choose some damn man and his wanting a house over transportation for your kids? Your ex husband needs to come and take the kids so that you can give ALL of your time to your dumbass boyfriend
2006-11-09 11:23:16 · answer #6 · answered by classy&sassy 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell your boyfriend that he really must make a choice: either lend you his car without complaining or letting your ex-husband drive your kids. He has to come to terms with your ex being the father of your kids. Your boyfriend has chosen you, and you are a whole person, with you history/story included (ex, children, past, etc), I mean, he can't pick just a part of you.
2006-11-09 11:23:04 · answer #7 · answered by cecilia d 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
, You are putting good money down after bad, your bf is a looser and abuser best house clean and get rid of him, what you are doing now isn't working find some thing else
2006-11-09 11:23:12 · answer #8 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well your an idiot ain't you..... why couldn't he sell his car why your? He sounds like he doesn't care about you and your kids.
of course your ex is gonna pick up your son how else is he gonna get to school.
2006-11-09 11:21:34 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Drop him. You have bent over backwards to hel him out and he seems like a complete jerk. You dont need him, honestly
2006-11-09 11:36:07 · answer #10 · answered by geoffzaz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋