I need some advice I think she really afaid to have wild sex with her husbend and he really whats it. I gave her some favor lotion to rub on him and herself. I believe she has'nt use it. What do u say to a person like her. I'am only try to help her. Because of what she tells me. She won't look at pron she thinks everything is drity. Her husbend had affair on her 10yrs. ago. He been clean everysense. He just whats some wild sex from his wife. As a friend am trying to help her out.
2006-11-09 08:36:58 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If u want to help her, suggest for her and her husband to see a marriage counselor regarding their issues as they seem to have bigger problems than u can do anything about.
2006-11-09 08:39:35 · answer #1 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a friend you should stay out of it, and tell your friend you don't want to discuss the matter.
The worst thing anyone can do is complain about their partners in that area, if he is unhappy with her no amount of wild sex as you put it will make it right, he and you are just making too big a deal out of it, there is so much more to marriage than sex.
What if he had an accident and could never perform the act again, would she still love him and stay with him and vice versa, things happen.
and just because he says he has been clean ever since does not mean he is, he lied once before right. So how do you know that is not the reason that his wife is holding back, I wouldn't even let him touch me if that would have happened to me. It never goes away.
2006-11-09 08:42:25 · answer #2 · answered by Neptune2bsure 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I used to be very much like this "friend" you're talking about. If she thinks everything is dirty, that's a mindset she will have to change if she wants to save her marriage. They are married, after all... sex between a husband and wife isn't "dirty"; it's an important part of the marriage, and should be treated as such.
The best thing that ever happened to me was my boyfriend wanting me to masturbate for him. I didn't want to at first - I was timid, embarrassed, prudish. But once I realized that all he wanted was for ME to be happy, it was much easier. Now we do it, together, all the time. If she and the husband can do that for each other (no touching each other at first), she should start to loosen up.
One other thought: suggest she try sex in the shower, with him behind her. She might be nervous about what she looks like. That way, she can let herself go - and be "clean" at the same time!
2006-11-09 08:46:17 · answer #3 · answered by 40yomama 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have good intentions, but you should suggest that she go see a therapist or that they go to counseling together.
There may be a number of reasons that she won't have wild sex with her husband; maybe she was molested as a child; maybe she's been sexually assaulted and hasn't discussed it with anyone. Maybe her upbringing or religion makes sex "dirty" to her. Maybe she and her husband haven't completely dealt with the impact of his affair and she's still punishing him. Do you really know that he's been faithful to her since then?
Giving someone some flavor lotion to use means nothing if the whole idea of sex to her is dirty. I know you mean well, but her problem is probably bigger than you can effectively deal with. The best thing you can do is suggest that she and her husband get counseling.
2006-11-09 08:44:27 · answer #4 · answered by Le_Roche 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
then the husband needs to grab his wife and throw her down and just do it. he can talk about it until he blue in the face but if he can show her how good he can make her feel then she might have a change of heart. He can surprise her one day, and plan a special evening for just the two of them uninterrupted. It might also help if she hears it from the husbands mouth. But wild sex isn't everyone's thing, so he can help her by introducing her to new things and gradually introduce more stuff, but he should take his time and be patient and gentle, show his wife he wants to make passionate love to her not just jump up and down inside her like a madman.
2006-11-09 08:44:35 · answer #5 · answered by TRUTH HURTZ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a pal you may desire to maintain out of it, and tell your pal you do no longer desire to talk related to the difficulty. The worst factor anybody can do is whinge approximately their companions in that difficulty, if he's unhappy which contain her no volume of wild intercourse as you place it is going to make it suited, he and you're in simple terms making too extensive a deal out of it, there is so lots extra to marriage than intercourse. What if he had an twist of destiny and could by no capability take area interior the act as quickly as extra, could she even nonetheless love him and carry on with him and vice versa, concerns happen. and easily because of the actuality that he says he has been sparkling ever pondering does now no longer mean he's, he lied as quickly as in the previous than suited. So how have you ever learnt this is now no longer the point that his companion is keeping lower back, i does no longer even enable him touch me if that could have got here approximately to me. It by no capability is going away.
2016-12-17 07:16:17 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first of all learn to spell. It is hard to read something that you have to struggle to read. Second of all to be honest it is none of your buisness what goes on in someone elses sex life, your friend talks to you so she can vent and tell someone how she feels. Not for you to be all in her buisness. Leave it alone, she is a grown woman who can make her own decisions. It almose sounds as if you want to sleep with her husband as obsessive you are being with trying to "HELP" her! Mind your own buisness, stay out of THEIR marraige, and get a life. If you want to be a real friend just let her talk that is all she is looking for.
2006-11-09 08:41:53 · answer #7 · answered by melissa052572 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont think this is an issue you can push on someone. She has to want to do it. She probably still has issues if he had an affair in the past, those things are hard to get over.
2006-11-09 08:42:46 · answer #8 · answered by Jenny K 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She should go to a therapist who can better help her understand her hesitation in a perfeclty normal physical relationship with her husband. Let her know that this is something she needs to work on with her husband. Good luck.
2006-11-09 08:39:20 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I won't look at porn either, but my husband and I still have fun. The thing is, he has got to make her feel comfortable. You know, go sweet and slow at first with new things. Somethings I thought I'd never like, it turns out I really enjoy because my husband was understanding enough to go sweet and slow at first.
Something to tell him more than her I guess.
2006-11-09 08:44:07 · answer #10 · answered by daisyk 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋