My boyfriend is a very jealous person and he said he would kill me if I hurt him. The thing is he always accuses me. The other night I broke up with him, why, because I am afraid. I truly love this man with all my heart but if you tell someone you are going to kill them you have a serious problem. I live in a coed dorm and every night he tells me that someone is in bed with me when Iam completely alone. So i just ended it, i dont want to but its seems it cant be avoided. he cried and cried and told me how i will never find someone that treats me like him......he treats me ok but I love my life. What should i do my heart is in so much pain I want to cry but i am afraid it will hurt more. THis is the person i spent all my time with for 3 years, lost my virginity to and share so many memories with.
2006-11-09 07:12:03 · 24 answers · asked by cecelia_reyes 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He has serious issues and so do you if you want to stay with someone who tells you he is going to kill you.
2006-11-09 07:15:02 · answer #1 · answered by Premo Mom 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Alright, if this guy is threatening your life if you cause him pain, then the best thing is to be away from it. He's obviously insecure and you can't spend you life under a constant disbelief of your actions. If there is no trust in your relationship from either side, then the relationship is in vain. You may have had quite a history with him, but the threats and the jealousy can materialize into physical harm to you. Jealousy leads to rage which leads to action being taken without rational thought. And if he is making threats, then how far is he really away from crossing that line? ANY guy can treat you better than that guy can, simply by realizing that there will be times that they will get hurt in one way or another, and accepting it. How well has he really treated you? He placed you in fear of him and doesn't trust you and constantly accuses you of going astray? Oh some guy he is. He deserves a medal for his chivalry. Can you feel the sarcasm in the last few lines? Good luck to you.
2006-11-09 07:20:17 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
look, this guy obviously is obsessed. The crying game, please, this is the oldest trick in the book. The reasons that he told you that he would kill you is a way to mentally trap you in the relationship. In most cases men like this only say things to intimidate you. If you could imagine the progression of his actions if you dedicated a long term (marriage) to him. You need to move on. If his actions become obsessive, like , stalking you or pressuring you to be with him then you need to go to your local authorities and file a report and let the authorities know of his possessive nature and obsessive ways. In the mean time keep your head up and be very aware of your daily surroundings. He is going to have to learn to let go. You on the other hand regardless if you have lost your innocence to him have to cut the ties with all of that and start all over again. Somethings in life are just not what they seem. It is not the life we choose its the life we live. So, in reality it's your life and your responsibility and remember no one owns us on this earth we are free individuals only bound by words and actions.. Be careful and good luck.
2006-11-09 07:34:07 · answer #3 · answered by skawp 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really need to break things off with this person, and seek counseling because he may just do what he is saying to you or hurt someone close to you. Love hurts but you get over it and life goes on, involve yourself in other things. If you are not in church go it might help to be around christian people for some type of guidance, inform your parents and friends of his threats toward you.
2006-11-09 07:25:26 · answer #4 · answered by JANET H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing! It may not seem like it now but your life is priceless.
Make sure to get the police, your family, family and school involved in these threats he is making toward you. You may want to get counseling to get over the feelings you are having. That relationship was unhealthy. Eventually your feelings for him will go away, until then pray and ask God to help ease your pain.
2006-11-09 07:21:19 · answer #5 · answered by monetmonroe 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, he has some serious issues. You did the right thing leaving him. He tells you that you won't find anyone because he's afraid that you're the only one who'll put up with his insecurities. So just cry if you have to, but keep your head high. You will find someone better. Much better.
2006-11-09 07:20:07 · answer #6 · answered by cyber_music 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Restraining order and get some protection physically. Maybe change dorm rooms and don't tell him. Change the locks for sure and start telling people around you about these threats so they can help ensure your safety.
Take this seriously and make sure you just stop talking to him. He's NUTS! He needs a shrink too!
2006-11-09 07:17:10 · answer #7 · answered by Dr. Kat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yep, I was in the same situation once! Thing is, he really wasn't lying! He was my first, I thought we'd be together forever. Well, I ended it one night after his craziness, and he beat me and did try to kill me. If it hadn't been for an intervention, I believe he would have done everything in his power to hurt me as much as he could. Get out of the situation now, and stay far far away from him!
2006-11-09 07:19:59 · answer #8 · answered by eaglesnest1119 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Baby girl if your that afraid of him you need to follow your feelings of being scare of him rather than listening to your heart! Sometimes our heart gets us introuble! You never know if he will hurt you physically or not! I rather you not find out. And trust me you will find someone who will treat you 100 times better than what he has treated you in the past! Stay encourage God will work it out! Praying always heals the heart!
2006-11-09 07:35:18 · answer #9 · answered by brown sugar 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow u just explained my ex! he used to make up these crazy stories i never cheated on him and he waould be like whos in the background (tv) or where are u? what are u doin out in the middle of the night? (im sleeping in bed) and of course i am crying all the time and i didnt even do anything! u need to break up with him. thats crazy! my ex was doing coke though. thats what made him act like a nut job. but either way its bad news.
2006-11-09 07:16:07 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you made the right decision by ending it with him. Chances are, this behavior will only get worse. You are right, you don't tell someone you love that you are going to kill them - EVER!!
It will take time to move on. Your heart will ache for awhile, but eventually you will get over it. Good luck to you!
2006-11-09 07:17:36 · answer #11 · answered by Kailey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋