I have 2 kids and pregnant with our third... and my husband and I are best friends... but lately he has been leaving at the drop of a hat anytime anyone calls him to get out with him. He's fortunate enough that he's been able to keep his friendship with most of the people he knew in school but I on the other hand never get to get out with mine- and probably would have no idea how to even get ahold of them if I wanted to. He doesn't understand that I need him as company when I've been at work all day. He's just happy to have friends and to get out of the house... but it's turning into ALL the time. I feel like I have to check with his schedule before I can plan anything with him- and I'm always put behind his friends. He's 23 - is this normal?! I don't want to be the wife that "makes" him stay home but I want my husband back too. I don't want to be lonely. What do I do?
2006-11-09 06:29:11 · 16 answers · asked by KC 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
How could you have said it anymore honest and plain and without malice.Print out your question and hand it to him. A good man would see this as you trying to solve a problem the right way.Everyone should be able to depend on their spouse for company.Maybe let him see the answers too.Good Luck my wife ditched me constantly before she left.She didnt believe in trying to solve anything.
2006-11-09 08:46:42 · answer #1 · answered by Honest Injun 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is young, so I can understand, and you might be more emotional and having mood swings because your pregnant. He also might be trying ot get his freedom in before the responsibilities of the new baby and helping you through your labor, etc.
I would talk to him, and ask him if you're doing something to make him want to stay away. Try planning new activities for the two of you. Please, communicate. He isn't a mind reader. Let him know exactly how you're feeling! In fact, use the exact words.
I don't want to be the wife that "makes" him stay home but I want my husband back too. I don't want to be lonely. What do I do?
If he loves you he will understand and make an effort. good luck!
2006-11-09 14:33:58 · answer #2 · answered by Mrs.Gaddis 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes at that age and having a lot of responsibility with 2 kids and another on the way he might be feeling trapped or in pretty deep and overwhelmed. Talk to him and let him know you understand his feelings. Be cautious too, sometimes when that happens at that time in his life he starts fooling around looking for that freedom he thinks he's lost. Give him more attention and more lov'n. You know what I mean. Use your charms to keep him happy and at home. Try and have a romantic night once a week to keep him from straying. Every man needs lov'n.
2006-11-09 14:42:55 · answer #3 · answered by Zig Zag 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is normal behavior for a lot of guys. The problem is that he is taking you for granted and not being considerate. Make an effort to get out with some friends at least once a week. Go out alone if you have to, hopefully your Mom or siblings are around.
You have made it way to convenient for him. I t sounds like he is way too comfortable that you are tied down.
2006-11-09 14:37:36 · answer #4 · answered by MG 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should have married a man not a guy ....sounds like he is still in high school.....when you see him next ask him if being a father,and a husband is "less" important then hanging with his friends???.... then simply state the fact that he needs to be with his family..... you will soon find out what king a person you married. I hope for yours and your kids sake that he chooses to be a man and take care of his family.....I would consider being left home to take care of the kids and house and doing all the raising and cooking and stuff to be abuse, your not his maid or baby sitter your his wife. so be the strong woman your kids need you to be and get you house in order or risk losing you guy to high school again.....
2006-11-09 14:40:59 · answer #5 · answered by 4stringthndr 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Simple, tell him that his wife, and kids need him to be around more often. i am sorry to say, but at 23 years old, he is still a bit immature. Family should always come first.
2006-11-09 14:33:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't matter if he is 23 or 83, a husband/father's place at night is his HOME with his FAMILY. End of story.
2006-11-09 14:36:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him how you feel, if he really loves you he will understand how you feel, you love him and you want to see him and right now I think you need him more than his friends. You are his lifetime partner, you should be just as important as his friends, even more and right now you're carrying his child, he should be there to help you, even if you've been through this.
2006-11-09 14:35:45 · answer #8 · answered by Chiemi 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him that you are lonely and want to spend more time with him. you could agree to let him go out with his friends once or twice a week, and he could let you go out on your own. maybee reconnect with some friends, take a class, or find a new hobbie?
also make sure you have a date night with each other every couple of weeks.
2006-11-09 14:36:39 · answer #9 · answered by Crazy dog lady 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why not suggest a weekly date? you dan't have to go anywhere and sometimes it could include the kids. after they go to bed you can get something yummy to eat and a movie and snuggle up on the couch. if you make it a certian day a week then you can count on it and he can plan around it.
2006-11-09 14:34:18 · answer #10 · answered by onlylove41 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋