Can't stop thinking about him! Why?

Question

I finally went out with my first love when I was 17. We dated for 2 months and then I broke up with him because he seemed to have lost interest in me. Now I am married to another man. We have a child together. We have been together for five years, married for three years. However, he treats me like **** sometimes and he drinks alot. Not to mention he doesn't work due to so-called "panic attacks" and is on disability and he hardly helps me around the house. We are always broke. My ex has come in and out of my life several times in the past five years. Once I even cheated on my husband (before we were married) with him once. Just recently after 2 years of no contact he calls me out of the blue. My husband says I need to cut off all contact with him in order to make things work. I decided to do this. I have not talked to my ex in a week and I still can't get him out of my head. Even when my husband and I have sex I think about him. I don't want to feel this way! Help!!

When my ex and I were talking on the phone, I told him my husband and I were divorcing. Even though this is not true, we were on the verge of of it. I never called him back to explain and I said I would. My husband has already changed our cell phone numbers because my ex kept texting me. I guess I kind of feel bad that I never told him the truth...

Answer 1

Give it a lil more time if u still fell that way and things r still not going well with your husband then u need 2 take some time 2 yourself. then if u feel free and up 2 it try and c if things will work between u and your ex, but b careful.

Good Lcuk!!

Answer 2

When someone is in a bad relationship for an extended period of time just about anybody will look good to them. I mean you dated the guy for 2 months. Everybody has good qualities in the beginning. Your old friend probably just reminds you of better times in your life and that is why you think of him. Your husband is right about one thing though. You will not be able to work on your marriage if you are involved/talking to this other guy. Chances are it isn't but if for some reason it was meant to be with you and your ex then you need to break it off with your husband before attempting to explore a relationship with someone else. You are doing nobody any favors by stringing the ex along. The problems you are having at home are normal and could most likely be fixed if you two really were committed to working it out. If you don't feel like it can then you owe it to everyone involved to end things with the ex, get a divorce, then talk about looking for love again.

Answer 3

You will always have feelings with your ex for the rest of your life especially since he was the first love. I think about my first love from time to time and I am completely dedicated to my family and would never leave them for anything. I can only say that cutting all ties to him is best because it sounds like you are wondering what could have been and the point is that it did not work the first time and it would not work now because you are married. It does not sound like you are in a very healthy relationship with your husband and you need to get him to help out around the house and work on treating you better because your happiness does have a direct effect on your child. You have to think about your life now and what is making you so unhappy that you dream of something else. Remember that your child's future is based on what they learn growing up because no matter how much we said we would not be like our parents we are to some point because that is how we learned that relationships should be.

Answer 4

Wow..I honestly wish I had something useful to say to you,but more than likely what I will say will help you none. Seriously,you should've never married your husband,especially if you only married because you have a kid together. ALWAYS A BAD IDEA. I married my ex wife because we had our little girl,so I only figured marriage was next in line. WRONG. We ended up having another baby before she cheated on me. It was the hardest time in my life,and still hurts to this day. The point I am trying to make is,if you love someone else,don't lead on the other person..it only makes it harder in the end. I suggest talking to your husband about this. To love someone for so long,and to be with someone else,is not only bad for you,but bad for a relationship. If you truly love your ex,and truly feel like you'd be better off with him,then what is stopping you? Don't stay together for the kid,it will just ruin you and your kid's relationship in the long run. I hope I have helped some,but again,probably not at all. I hope all turns out for you! Best of luck..

Answer 5

I'd be thinking about a divorce. My answer has nothing to do with the fact you may still be in love with another man. No man should treat a women in a bad way. Women are our goddesses and should be treated as such. Without love there is no marriage. Get a divorce and get it over with.

Answer 6

First of all, maybe you should contact a counselor. You have a lot of issues. If you are unhappy in your marriage and don't want to be with your husband becaue he is a dead beat, then leave. But never leave for someone else. Leave because that is truly what you need to do.

Answer 7

maybe the reason you can't stop thinkin about him is because there is a part of you that still has feelings for him even though you don't want too. trust i think all people go through it getting over their first love's is tough

Answer 8

It is so obvious you still in love with your ex
and your husband sound like a ***hole and need to be dumped he doesn't deserve you

Answer 9

Give it time. It's only been 7 days, Each time he creeps into your head, change the subject. Pick something else to think about.

Answer 10

YOU STILL HAVE FEELINGS FOR UR EX BUT U NEED TO FIGURE OUT WHICH GUY U WANT MORE