ok heres a good one for mature relationships?

Question

My girlfriend and I have been seeing each other for two months we make out and stuff and we see each other like every other week i love her very much and i say so she likes it when i tell her that, she is divorced as well as I. she has been out of her relationship for 10 months. she says she doesnt know how she feels yet, her and her ex have a house together and are selling it she is told by her ex that she has to keep in communication and can not see other people. she says it could ruin things with the divorce. (i was thinking she was talking about the money or she just wants to wait till the finality of the diivorce to get serious) my goal is so she feel more open and she's not so confused she drives about an hour and a half to see me almost once a week but now and this has happened several times where she say we need to take things slower she says this will all be over in january and we should wait till then to get serious but she want to be able to talk with me and chat

Answer 1

i say the if that is what she want you have to respect it and accep it that way.

Answer 2

"My girlfriend and I have been seeing each other for two months we make out and stuff and we see each other like every other week i love her very much and i say so she likes it when i tell her that, she is divorced as well as I. she has been out of her relationship for 10 months. she says she doesnt know how she feels yet, her and her ex have a house together and are selling it she is told by her ex that she has to keep in communication and can not see other people. she says it could ruin things with the divorce. (i was thinking she was talking about the money or she just wants to wait till the finality of the diivorce to get serious) my goal is so she feel more open and she's not so confused she drives about an hour and a half to see me almost once a week but now and this has happened several times where she say we need to take things slower she says this will all be over in january and we should wait till then to get serious but she want to be able to talk with me and chat"


But she says I can still send her money and that she has to pretend that she still loves her husband but she will try and call me once a month and dont pay attention to the guy in the background cuz she loves me and not him but because the cat ran away she can go with me yet cuz it might not come home and im sad so i take things slower and dont call her for two months and when i do her husband picks up the phone and tells me that im a loser but dont stop giving them money and i drive around and cry but then i go home and send her a check cuz i know she love me and not him and my question is do you think i should send them even more money?

Answer 3

The point you don't make is if she's legally divorced yet. At first it sounds like she is, then it sounds like she isn't.
If she is then the sale of the house and the money she gets from it should be in writing in the divorce decree and the ex has no right or reason to make these demands of her. If it's in the decree, there isn't a thing he can do about her seeing other people, period. The court has already told him what he's gonna do and he has to abide by it or face legal actions from it.
If she isn't legally divorced yet, he could be using the house as a form of blackmail to keep her under his control and single. If this is the case, then you guys should keep your seeing each other quiet until it's over.
Still, it doesn't sound right. If they're in the process of divorce, the court system should have already told them the house has to sold and the money divided between them. Unless of course, they just agreed to it out of court, but even then I think the judge would have to know about all assets, including the house and it's sale.
If she has a lawyer, she should talk to him about this. He's supposed to be taking care of this part of the divorce partition for her. If she doesn't have a lawyer, she should get one before he screws her out of her fair share.

Answer 4

This is certainly a hectic & anxious time for her. Be there for her when she needs you, support her without crowding her & if you two were meant to be, things will certainly work out.

A girl usually start feeling the need to take a few steps & analyse the situation when they feel things going out of hand. This probably is a good sign as she is certainly affected by you. So take that as a positive sign & step aside to give her space but do not cut off contacts or stop calling altogether. Keep in touch but barely so from your end.

Answer 5

Having gone through divorce I can sympathize and empathize. Yet, she is now a free person and her soon to be ex=husband really has no claim on her to make such demands. Seeing someone else will make no difference to the divorce in this time of no fault divorce. However, the wound is still very fresh and takes time to heal, so give her as much as she needs.

Answer 6

first thing to do is learn how to communicate effectively without run on sentences and starting a new subject in the middle of a sentence with maybe using capitalization and if you wanted to get really crazy even punctuation i think you should be careful telling a girl that you love her who isn't even done with the divorce yet and if she is saying you should wait till January and then maybe you should just wait to see what happens too bad you won't get to make out and stuff until then whatever that means.

Answer 7

And you said this i a mature relationship? How do you know you love her, it's been two months, you haven't really spent much time with her to know. Once a week for two months isn' t alot of time to know someone. And it sounds like she needs to be out of relationship 1 and know herself before she goes on to another relationship. Sounds like a recipe for disaster. And if she says divorce will ruin things? What is that about? Sounds like she is having second thoughts.

Answer 8

January is not that far off. Give her the space she needs and if things havent changed by February then I would suggest moving on.

By the way first you say shes divorced then you say it isnt final. If it isnt final then shes not yet divorced. That made your question confusing.

Answer 9

Being so new to getting back into the dating scene...give her the space that she needs. Maybe she just needs an adjustment within herself to get her mind together and may not have anything to do with you. It's difficult to go from one relationship to another with out having a moment to mourn/breathe in between. She's still very emotional...try an be patient with her.

Answer 10

You should have a serious heart to heart with your girlfriend and discuss your feelings openly. If she still makes excuses, then you must draw the line as to how much you are willing to put up with and base your decision regarding your relationship on that.

Empty promises are simply that.

Answer 11

Be careful of this one. Always remember, it's important in ALL relationships to give each other space,{reasonably} and don't act "clingy" or persistant. If something is going to develope with you and this woman, it will. Let nature take its course. Thing that are meant to be always are. ps. try not to get your hopes up to high, cause being hurt really sucks!