I have been a good 22 years of my life being straight. I have also been 3 years married and I have a 2 year old son. I have always been attrated to females, since my Sophmore year of High School. Everytime I had a chance to do something with a Female as soon as we would start I would feel wierd and stop, and its always been like that, Females turn me on as if I was a guy. I can't bring myself to do anything with them thought. I absolutly love having sex with guys. The truth is that I still feel very strong about Females. Deep down inside I would kinda hate myself if I was to divorce my hubby and get with a female. My family would hate me, and I think my son would too. I don't know what to do about this feeling, I have gone down on a girl but it was like for 5 minutes and I stoped and I couldnt go any further....I don't know whats wroung with me....this creeps me out...I need help !!!!!
2006-11-09 03:40:26 · 7 answers · asked by I think of you I touch Myself 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
The best thing I can tell you is that YOU ARE NORMAL!!! LOL I know it may not seem like it, but it is natural to have reservations when exploring your sexuality......... It took me all of my 24 years to finally get to a point where I know what I really want. Just don't push the issue. Your true self will surface eventually. As for your family and son hating you..... there is no way they can hate you for finding yourself and you will never be happy being someone else.
2006-11-09 03:50:59 · answer #1 · answered by ~T.O.M.B.O.Y.~ 1 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like thoughts of what your family with think and how your son may react is whats holding you back.
I went through this with my mother when I was around 8 she left my dad. I think the biggest problem I have with my mother isn't the fact that she's gay but that she just left, I didn't see her again till I graduated high school you know. As long as your son knows that you still love him, and that if his Dad is a (Good Man)he sees that you respect his father. As a child in that type of situation if I would have seen just those two things I really think my Relationship with my Mother would still be intact.
Maybe go on Vacation and try it, like Vegas or cancun or something. That may ease the Pressure becasue it's not where you live (For starters) then maybe that will give you the boost you need to date or your married so I don't know. There are swingers out there if you want to let the Hubby join in. I don't want to tell you what to do or anything like that.
Just don't leave your son, cause that does hurt.
2006-11-09 11:57:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Obviously you have performance issues, your worried that you will not be able to please a woman. Are you difficult to please? Also being with a woman is more intimate and maybe your afraid of your feelings. As for everyone hating you because you would be with a woman is ridiculous. There is no reason why anyone should live a life as a lie. I would only imagine everyone in your family including your son would want you happy- and your husband too. It would be the way you handle things. You don't just find a woman and leave your husband and family. Why don't you try talking to your husband about your feelings, who knows maybe he will listen.
2006-11-09 11:46:39 · answer #3 · answered by mylife 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like you're having a difficult time dealing with bisexuality. it's understandable, especially if you were raised to think that the only acceptable form of sex is between a man and a woman. does your husband know about your attraction to women? if he doesn't, you should be honest with him. hell, he may even want to help you explore your sexuality via a three way. as for your feelings, i think you should do some research about bisexuality, and talk with a therapist about why you feel this way. a big part of it could be that you feel guilty for not being "the way wives are supposed to be", or it could be that you're scared about your husband's feelings on the subject. whatever the reason is, you should talk with someone about these feelings, and try to find a way to be comfortable with yourself. good luck!
2006-11-09 11:53:24 · answer #4 · answered by LoriBeth 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You should stop thinking of everyone else and do what is going to make you happy. You will hate yourself if you keep it in. And what if you can control it for now but in 5 yrs you just cant anymore then it will be worse for your family. Be honest with yourself and do what is right for you.
2006-11-09 13:13:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay. Okay. Calm down. Fantasy is not reality, and you don't have to do everything in your mind. I mean, every time I look at the National Zoo's Panda Cam, I think of how nice it would be to cuddle the baby panda and rub his fat, fluffy belly, but I'm not about to fly to Washington DC and try to climb over the fence into his yard, you know? You can simply enjoy your thoughts and fantasies.
Some people can have open marriages, but it takes a lot of hard work and a lot of understanding. You'd have to accept that he gets a girlfriend, too. Does he know how you feel about women?
Since you love your husband and love sex with your husband, why consider divorcing him? If you find yourself attracted to a man with a different eye color or of a different height, would you think to divorce then? Instead, try watching lesbian porno, or talking about women together. Laugh at yourself instead of beating yourself up. Put up pictures. Get friends you can talk about crushes with.
As a bisexual woman, I'm married to another woman. I get crushes on men, too. I have had sex with a man in the past, but we're monogamous now. I don't have to be with a man now in order to know that I am bisexual. I look at sexy race car drivers on TV, and my wife laughs at me--"Oh, Tony Stewart's on, you can't talk to her yet." I look at UPS guys and executives who fill out their Brooks Brothers suits real nice. I had a calendar of male chefs from DC restaurants, posing naked with hands or boxes or pans over their bits and pieces, in my kitchen. "It inspires me to be a better cook," I'd laugh.
Bottom line, just think of the women you're attracted to the way you would men who aren't your husband. Look, don't touch, enjoy.
2006-11-09 11:51:12 · answer #6 · answered by GreenEyedLilo 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I think is normal... now just try to be yourself and feel the way u do... good luck
2006-11-09 11:58:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋