I'm a fairly regular guy. Late 20's, tall and above-avg looks. I'm also college-educated w/ some grad school under my belt. So I don't feel that I'm a total loser. My problem is that I've always been a little on the shy side, and a bit of a loner. I have basically 2 friends in my life outside of my family with which I get along great. I'm actually very easy to get along with, and was pretty popular in my small hometown, but have found it hard to make close friends as I've gotten older. I also feel that when I start dating a woman, the fact that I have very few 'buddies' tends to put a damper on the romance. I feel they think 'what's wrong w/ the guy w/ no friends?' and lose interest. Is this all in my head? This issue has prevented me from asking out other women before because I think it will be a problem. What is a woman's take on this????
2006-11-08 22:07:17 · 12 answers · asked by mu 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
All you need is 'booster shot' of confidence. If a guy comes up to ask a gal to go to dinner and he seems unsure, girls take it as the guy is unsure of her, like the female is not good enough or something. You must find ways to put this notion of few friends out of your head. There is a Chinese proverb that says something to the effect that "if in your life you have three best friends you are a very rich man..." You say you have two, so that makes you a very wealthy man at least. There is nothing wrong with having close and reliable friends. Better than having a plethora of acquaintances that you can't trust or count on. To start with ask 'your boys' to set you up, girls love intense fellows. I know I am a sucker for a shy fellow. No woman likes a blow-hard-talks-too-much type of guy.
2006-11-08 22:27:40 · answer #1 · answered by xillith 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think too many women would care how many friends you have, in fact, it's probably a good thing! Better to have a couple of close friends rather than lots of 'friends' who you hardly ever see or associate with. Don't worry your life about it, otherwise your princess is going to pass you by! You sound like a great guy with a lot going for you, so chin up and start asking those chicky babes out!
2006-11-09 06:28:10 · answer #2 · answered by melfromhell001 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You dont actually state it but it sounds like you live in another town other than the one you grew up in, possible a larger populated area. You seem to be hung up on the # of friends you have, believe me, girls wouldn't be, in fact, some may count it as a blessing since you wouldn't be doing the guy thing constantly with all of them. Stop being so self conscious of yourself, you seem like a nice guy. If you cant get over the friends issue and you do land up asking someone out and dating them, and if by any chance they ask you about your friends, if you are now living in a different area, you can state that you are not from this town.... and if you live in the same town as you were born in, your friends moved away. ITs that simple- but believe me, it's your issue, not the gals.
2006-11-09 06:13:37 · answer #3 · answered by mac 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The fact that you have little to no friends shouldn't damper anything. Sounds like you are having some self esteem issues. I would just assume you've been busy with your school or work or both. Maybe you spend a lot of time with a sickly family member or are a caregiver. All pluses in my book
2006-11-09 06:11:03 · answer #4 · answered by driftinglust 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tis better to have only a few close friends than to have a bunch of "friends" that you aren't close to.
I see nothing wrong with you and your situation... just a lot wrong, possibly, with the girls that you went out with. Keep your chin up, hon, and that perfect gal will come around when you least expect it. You sound like a wonderful man, so you WILL get that princess you have been looking for.
2006-11-09 06:13:34 · answer #5 · answered by Jennifer L 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
women I know think of the shy guy as a challenge. They want to try to get you to talk and loosen up. Keep asking women out. You will find the right one. A great place to meet is at church or temple to find someone with values like yours. Also try Match.com or similar sites
2006-11-09 06:11:03 · answer #6 · answered by winkcat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Woman can want to own someone just like men can do.... It is insecurities on her part and shouldn't be ok with you... It's healthy to have friends and people that you talk to besides a girlfriend, a girl like that is called ''possessive'' and you need to find mature woman that wont be this way with you and try and keep you in a box all to themselves......
2006-11-09 06:18:13 · answer #7 · answered by sexton 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mate!.... dont be sooooo shy. Thats probably why u dont pull the chicks. U kow u r gr8...all u have to do is let yourself get out there. Dont let the small town mentality ruin your chances...your cinderella will come just be a little patient and not so inhibited. xxxx
2006-11-09 06:12:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
i dont go out with someone because of the amount of friends he has. dont make an issue out of it. be yourself and the right one will come along, but you have to ask otherwise she could walk right on by
2006-11-09 06:12:25 · answer #9 · answered by my_lyin_eyes 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i don't think it is bad that you don't have a whole herd of friends. I think that this is all in your head. It speaks well of a man to have a few good friends then to have many false friends.
2006-11-09 06:13:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋