2006-11-08 12:50:27 · 31 answers · asked by Lady 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Asking this because i was talking with a friend whose very religious and apparently it says husband and wifes love should come first and mean most of all.
I'm not sure, we dont even have kids yet, but just wondering is this a normal thing that everyone thinks?
2006-11-08 12:57:27 · update #1
Dumb people, read the details before you say i shouldnt ask this. I am asking opinions. I myself dont even have kids yet. My friend says its in the bible... want to know other opinions. Some people are so stupid on this thing!
2006-11-08 13:03:09 · update #2
Yes, he SHOULD love you more than he does the kids, but very seldom does that happen. In my case, I definitely loved my kids more than I loved her, and we ended up divorced after 25 years. If I had loved her more than the kids , it might have ended up differently. If I had it to do over however, I think I would still love the kids more......they're MY flesh and blood!
2006-11-08 12:56:58 · answer #1 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know that you are talking about love. Perhaps you mean should he pay more attention to you than he does the kids or that should he spend more time with you than he does the kids?
Anyway, if you are feeling unloved, the best thing to do is to talk about it with your husband and and see if you can work out some issues that are making you feel that way. After all, once the kids are grown and living their own lives; ideally you and your husband will still be together so now would be a good time to start working on a relationship that will endure the empty nest syndrome.
2006-11-08 21:09:05 · answer #2 · answered by daisy 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well lets see i guess my love for my husband should come first especially when my children are grown but while they are small mother is god in the eyes of a child soooooo id say at that time my child's love is first so see as a baby id say no but when they grow up yes cuz i have seen parents who don't love there spouses enough to listen to them about there kids who have repetly hurt there parents and it causes divorce and a mother and father need to be a team to raise kids because kids can at an early age figure out how to manipulate parents to get what they want and if parents don't love each other enough it can cause conflict hope this makes sense
2006-11-08 21:17:54 · answer #3 · answered by alysiac78 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The love you have for a child should in almost all cases be unconditional. Many would say the same for a spouse.
The way you love a child is totally different than the way you love your spouse. I don't know of any scale or unit of measurement that you could use to determine the amount of love.
So why try to measure something that is a perception, that has no physical substance or weight, that does not cast a shadow, and has no odor or taste?
2006-11-08 20:58:13 · answer #4 · answered by OleMarbleEyes 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes! You were together as one before the kids were there and you will be together as one after the kids are gone.... Once while I was away on a business trip my son and wife had an argument that escalated to my son pulling a knife of my wife...He quickly came to his senses and put the knife down. My wife told me about it... I went to my son when I got back... I said to him that she is my wife and I love her more than I love you... If you try that again then I will kill you! Now, the threat to a 13 years old boy made a difference... I would never follow through on it but it did put a fear of God in him...
BTW... Today he is a very well adjusted and intelligent son who served his country in the middle east..and treats his mom with the utmost respect.
2006-11-08 21:11:32 · answer #5 · answered by Dan J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, this is a tough one. Sort of like the question: If your spouse and child were both drowning who would you save.
I actually asked my husband this once, his reply was "well you could always have more children, but you're wife is your wife."
Hard to say if I could say the same. A great part of me sees children as being helpless, therefore I'd want to save the child.... but there's that love for a spouse.
I'd say let me drown, and hubs saves the kid
2006-11-08 21:29:49 · answer #6 · answered by honeybaby729 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your friend is right. sort of. it's not that your husband should love you more than the kids, God said let no one come between you and your spouse. your husband should place God first in his life then you. Children are gifts from God. Being in love with you and loving his kids are incomparable. I searched a few verses for you to help you with this question. Check it out.
2006-11-08 22:40:33 · answer #7 · answered by kerik 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would ANYONE wanna make their husband choose the love like that. And your husbands love for you is and will be diffrent from the kids. Both of you (you and your child) his heart I am sure is big enough to love you both. I really don't get this question its like well I will never have kids with my husband he will love me more. Pretty silly
2006-11-08 22:33:40 · answer #8 · answered by Babie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
These are two different forms of love, so you should be able to feel that his love for you is special, and not like the love of the kids. I think that "more" is the wrong word in the question, because it isn't more, but special or an exclusive kind of love.
2006-11-08 21:03:14 · answer #9 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a tough one...
While your kids are really important, I guess at the end of the day kids will grow up and find partners of their own. Husbands and wives (all being well) will be together for the rest of their lives.
I think it's a different kind of love, but equal.
2006-11-08 20:54:25 · answer #10 · answered by Amy D 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋